Rape Poem

Can No Longer Trust

I wrote this poem to kind of tell people the fear you have when you get raped and also how it affects you for the rest of your life. Its been 7 years for me and I still absolutely cannot forget it. And it doesn't matter if I'm around my best, sweetest guy friend, I'm still afraid and nobody will ever understand that unless someone does something sick like that to them. But I have learned through all this that God has a purpose for everything- even this and no matter what He is always there for you so you are never alone!

Featured Shared Story

This poem hit right home for me. I was raped since I was 6 years old. I only left home 10 months ago. I sometimes wake up screaming, wishing I could just die to take away the pain inside. I...

Read complete story

Share your story! (70)

I Trusted You

©

Published by Family Friend Poems July 2009 with permission of the Author.

I hear the floor creek
Closer and closer toward my bedroom door
I try to stay quiet hiding under the covers
Though I know he will find me

I hope he doesn't hear my heartbeat
Or hear me praying God will protect me tonight
But as I do I start to cry because I know
TONIGHT'S ONE OF THOSE NIGHTS
WHEN GOD JUST DOESN'T HEAR ME

I let out one more sob
And the door swings open
The hallway light shines in
But darkness radiates off him
So strong
He has a smile on his face
Nothing will stop him
I cant even defend myself

He gets on top of me holding me down
As I try to turn away
He pulls me back covering my mouth
I am too scared to breathe

A few weeks pass by
I hear him moaning my name
While stumbling around the house
Closer and closer he is walking toward me

Now he is on my bed
And before he even touches me
I begin to cry as I wonder
Where is God tonight?

This time I fight back
I yell
I cry
But he has ways to shut me up.
I do everything I can to loosen his grip
He's hurting me so bad but will not let me go
NO
He will not let me go
Not until he is finished

He leaves me lying there
To think of what I have lost
"I'm sorry" is not enough
He doesn't even realize what it has cost

Another few weeks pass by
The shame keeps getting worse
Too afraid to tell
Though its so hard to hide this pain
Day after day

I must have been bad that night
I hear him coming closer as I'm lying on the floor
Lord I would do anything
If you would keep him from walking through that door

But he does
I finally realize I am all alone
No one to protect me
No one who can save me...
So I lie back down to take it
But he throws me on the bed
And makes me relive my worst fears
When I just want to be dead

I don't want to kill myself
I just want to die
God, why have you abandoned me?
Can you not see the tears I cry?

I will hurt myself later
After you have hurt me
This blood that stains the sheets
Tangled up on my bed
Reminds me of the words
The images you have put inside my head

I can still feel you touching me, grabbing me
Forcing my body closer to yours
The feeling of your cold fingers all over me
I constantly try to wash away
From my scarred skin

Since that first night
I live my life in fear
You are the reason I love too easily
Why I cannot love at all.
Because I trusted you
I can no longer trust

The pain I hold inside
You will never know
They will never understand
That my scars don't even begin to show...

  • Stories 70
  • Shares 709
  • Favorited 47
  • Votes 1880
  • Rating 4.59
Has this poem touched you? Share your story!
  • Itsuki Daugherty by Itsuki Daugherty
  • 8 months ago

I was raped from the age of 2 and I don't know when It stoped but it was a long and torturous time. I was raped by the people I trusted My dad, Brother, Uncle and their friends. They sold my body to random guys every single day i suffered. i wake up every night screaming and crying.

  • Nirma by Nirma
  • 6 years ago

I am a victim of sex abuse from the age of 5. I don’t know when it stopped, but I’m 19 now. I was abused by my neighbor. He was my brother’s friend and someone my family trusted. I never lost my virginity, but he made me lose my innocence.

  • Madison by Madison
  • 6 years ago

I was 7 and my brother raped me, so now I wake up screaming and crying. I also cut myself because every boy tries to bully me into being their property and I beat the crap out of them. I'm always screaming and my nickname is Asylum. My best uncle ever died.

  • Esther Smucker by Esther Smucker
  • 6 years ago

This poem hit right home for me. I was raped since I was 6 years old. I only left home 10 months ago. I sometimes wake up screaming, wishing I could just die to take away the pain inside. I am working on pressing charges in my birth family. It has been so unsafe for me that I have changed my name and moved so many times. I have these awful memories of the night that I try to push them away. I fear that if any man finds out that they will either leave me or hurt me the same way.

  • Why by Why
  • 8 years ago

Yeah, I've been raped too. I know what you mean when you say falling in love too easy and not loving at all as a result. It's so hard for me to trust anyone too but whatever. It's just a bad mix of psychology.

  • Elizabeth Lovett by Elizabeth Lovett
  • 9 years ago

I can kind of relate. I'm 18 now but I've been struggling with really bad anxiety and depression and I know the core of the problem is because of abuse that happened when I was really little when an older friend used to come over all the time. I want to talk about it and get over it but I can hardly ever bring it up without crying or hating myself. How do you get over something like that.

  • Shala Sandoval by Shala Sandoval
  • 10 years ago

I know how it feels because each day I live in fear even though it happened when I was 6 till I was 8 and now that I'm 19 and pregnant from a guy I thought had cared about me but now wants nothing to do with me or his kid...Since I was raped from an older cousin I had another cousin that was very protective of me and always tried to be there for me but he couldn't and that's when I got scared and ran away from home so many time and since then I was put into foster care at age 8 and finally got out before my 18th birthday and since then I keep falling for the wrong types of guys that I think love me but only have used me and broke me more but yet I am still here and stronger than I have been so keep your head up and stay strong.

  • Mone by Mone
  • 10 years ago

I can almost relate. When I was about 7 my older cousin age 15 touched me and would make me touch myself and touch him. At age 9 my other cousin age 13 would touch and hurt me and at age 12 my uncle semi molested me he didn't touch "down there", but he would rub my body and finally I had enough torture and told my mom about my uncle. She doesn't know about my cousins though. I would cut myself and still do but I'm trying to get better. Now I'm 13 and will be 14 in 2 months.

  • Sky by Sky, England
  • 10 years ago

This poem really got to me, I'm 17 and i was abused by my dad for 12 years and I was too scared to tell anyone as he said that he would kill me if I did. I see his face in my mind everyday and I can still feel him touching me and he just haunts my dreams all the time.
It's a nasty and horrible experience to go through, I believed it was normal and it happened to everyone and it was only until I started doing sex ed at school I realized what was happening isn't right and it made me feel sick inside and out. I hated myself and blamed myself for what happened. Seeing this has helped me realize that it's not just me that has gone through this sort of experience and that it's ok to talk about things thanks xxxx

  • Canada by Canada, Alberta
  • 10 years ago

Hello, my name is lynda and I'm still young for my age, I'm 14 and I'm not going to pity you, cause I know how it feels, I'm not going to say sorry for you, cause what ever I say cannot change your past. And I'm not going to tell you about what happened to me (My sob story), but I wanted to say you are very strong for what you gone through cause your still alive you haven't commited suicide and I'm happy, I'm happy you told someone while some people have not, I also wanted to say that god is with everyone even though we go through very bumpy roads, he just had his reasons of why this type (or other type) of situations. I know you don't know me but thank you for writing this poem about your life, cause it showed that I'm not the only one that went through rough time, you saved my life by me not ending it, thank you :) I hope your wounds heal, keep strong!! And everyone else that reads this, and been though hard times stay strong, or tell a trusted adult, cause you all don't deserve to be through that, and just remember there is always a rainbow after a storm!!

  • Naadia T&Tobago by Naadia T&Tobago
  • 10 years ago

I am so very sorry to hear this. I wish those people who made you all suffer will get what they deserve. I really hope you all feel better. Try to move on from your horrid past, your future is still to come, Live life freely and if it happens you'll know what to do. I'm truly sorry guys.!

  • Kennedy by Kennedy, Phoenix
  • 10 years ago

I am a sophomore in high school and just a few months ago my tennis coach said these words " if I was 16 I'd be all over you." Hearing this from someone I was supposed to be able to trust was very difficult. I did not know what to do and went weeks before telling my own mother. I did tell the school the day after it happened because I did not feel comfortable being on a team with a coach that thought of me that way. The team ended up with a new coach the next week and the season went great. However, the old perverted coach began teaching at my school again almost two weeks ago. I was very scared to see this person because I did not know what he would say or do or what anyone else would say or do. I saw this person two days ago for the first time since the indecent happened and all he did was look at me like I am the one who did something wrong. I am scared for what will happen next considering I still have two years left before I leave. I don't have the support I need at home and at school only few people know about what happened. People tell me that words don't hurt, but trust me words do hurt more than I ever thought.

  • Abbie by Abbie
  • 10 years ago

When I was reading this all I was thinking was I had the same thing happened to me. I know how you feel I have flash backs all the time. I live with a sad face and scared that someone will do it or try to. A few months after it happened to me it happened again by the same guy when I was coming from my school. It is not even that far away he came from behind a big tree and boom it happened again. I ran to the school screaming and crying. My bother was at the smokers corner and saw me I ran over to him and dropped in his arms. I stopped breathing he picked me up and brought me to the offices while his buddies went to look for him.

  • J by J, Hall
  • 11 years ago

I never been raped or hurt myself, but I know people who have. I cannot fully understand the extent of what you guys go through because I am not you. I will not judge, I will not pity. But, my empathy goes out to everyone who has been hurt. Justice will come to those without justice, maybe not in this life, but definitely in the next. Just remember the power you have and how you are in control of your life. Don't ever let anyone make you feel inferior or like you're not in control. YOU ARE. And when you're scared or feel bad about yourself, just remember, that's how they want you to feel. And when you ever think your life is worthless, that you should end your life, remember. Sometimes justice comes with a sacrifice. Don't leave without some justice or piece within yourself. Sometimes just thinking about the small things will help you make it another day, especially on the bad ones. Looking towards the future always keeps the past bright. My heart goes out to all. LOVE, PEACE AND HAPPINESS FOR ALL WHO WANT TO RECEIVE IT. From a 12 almost 13 year old philosopher in the making. Sort of.

  • Mac10 by Mac10
  • 11 years ago

I am only 15 and I'm scared. When I'm alone, my grandpa comes in the room and asks me if I want 20$ I don't know what to do so I say "si" he smiles and puts his hands in my shirt and touches me. I tell him to stop that I'm busy but he doesn't instead he say want 20$ I tell him no and he goes away then comes back I don't know what to do. :'( I sometimes wish I could tell and everything will be alright but I can't tell because so many people like and love him no one will believe me. I want to be okay, you know? I want to be treated right. I want to fall in love and not think of boys hurting me :'( I'm still alone....

  • Andrea by Andrea
  • 11 years ago

Wow this poem is really touching even though I never went through anything like this. I've been in a situation where one of my closest friends got raped last year by two boys that lived next door to her and she told me two weeks after it happened. I didn't know what to do to help, but every time I tried to tell someone she wouldn't let me, but now she's doing fine, but I know she still thinks about it. I just wish I said something to someone sooner then I did.

  • Andrea by Andrea
  • 11 years ago

I am 24 yrs old now but when I was twenty I was staying with my aunt house she was having a party she sent me to the store with her boyfriend. While I was not looking he slipped something into my drink so I wouldn't understand nothing I started to feel dizzy and become unaware to the world. He took me to a hotel room and did what he wanted he left me there for dead when I finally did come around I was at the hospital. They caught him later that night he got charged he got to be a sex offender for ten years and probation for two.

  • Jessica by Jessica Poet
  • 11 years ago

Hello, I am the author of this poem and I just wanted to give you guys some encouragement and tell you the rest of my story. Reading all of your stories completely broke my heart, but thank you for continually reminding me that I am not alone. I want to let you all know that even though this abuse changes your life forever, YOU STILL HAVE A FUTURE. I still think of this everyday and although I'm never going to forget, I am continually learning to live a life that is not defined by what others have done to me or what I have done in response. I felt alone most of my life. My mom left me for drugs and my dad was an alcoholic for many years. I carried so much bitterness inside me because of all this. Against myself, against others. No one understood why. I didn't know how to handle the pain so I turned to alcohol, drugs, and hurting myself. I lived my life thinking that this limited the person I could be. I didn't really know who I was. I know it's so difficult for you to trust anyone now and it is for me too, but please hear me and consider what I am saying because this truly saved my life. Even though I was so angry with God for letting me go through this, after a few years I finally turned to him for healing. I realized that we are not defined by what we do or what others do, but we are defined by what Christ has done for us. If He loved us enough to die for us, we are worth so much more than those things they did to us. This realization freed me from living in the grasp of my past. Everything happens for a reason. I do not believe in God because I have been hurt or broken, but I believe in Him because I was made whole again. I still have a long way to go until I really move on, but hopefully this will encourage you to let you know that you have a future despite this: I have been clean for about 2 years. It has been almost 2 years since the last time I have hurt myself. I have been sober for over a year. I have recently become comfortable spending time alone with my best friend. I am graduating from high school this year with honors, and going on to attend a university. I still haven't told anyone the identity of my abuser, but I have been open with a couple people about the abuse itself. I will be praying for every one of you, that you find healing, strength, and a future filled with joy. Also, if you need continual support check out the "To Write Love On Her Arms" website.

  • Luisa by Luisa, Texas
  • 11 years ago

Hey, I read your poems and peoples comments. There's no words of how sorry I feel about all of this, I might not understand all your suffering, since I've never been through that... And I wish with all my life no person had to go through that horrible experience, and I might not know what are the rights words to say, I just want to say you're not alone in this world and there's always hope, love and happiness even when your world is all dark and scary and there's no one around or even god seems to ignore you, don't you give up, because you're beautiful and it will never ever be your fault..... Wish you all those innocent souls the very best, I love youll!!!!<<3

  • Jessica. Usa by Jessica. Usa
  • 11 years ago

I know how this all feels because I was raped from the time I was 6 till I was around 13. And since then I'm so scared to be alone I cut myself because of it. I don't really like myself cause he always put me down. But I know there is hope. I just wish no one else had to go through it like so many of us have.

  • Kirstie-Ara by Kirstie-Ara
  • 11 years ago

God is always with you, no matter what and there's reasons for everything, even if you never find out what they are. I've never been molested but I know people that have been, and I know when you make it you become stronger and he becomes weak. God has a plan for all the bad people in the world, and if they get away with it on earth, they're doomed to hells pits twice as hard.

  • Halle by Halle, Louisiana
  • 12 years ago

I was molested and raped by my step father. It started at the age of eight and didn't stop till I was twelve. We were from Louisiana but we moved to Indiana because of the hurricanes Ike and Rita. The only reason for this situation stopping was because I had told my teacher what happened. She called child protective services, they put me in anger management, therapy, counseling; and all of that. My mother tried too escape it and move back to Louisiana after they had told her that we were Wards Of The State, meaning you're not able too leave the state you are in until the case is dismissed. Once they figured out where we went they said we had four days to return or she was going too jail and I was going to a foster home. We returned yet still I had to go to a foster home. But must I remind you while this whole situation is going on everybody thinks that he just molested because that's all I had told them... too scared and ashamed of what my family and friends might think and how they may judge me if I was to tell them I was also raped by him too. After being in foster home a couple months my mother wanted me to tell them that I lied about the whole thing so the case can be dismissed... and I did, because she was my mom. But now that I'm 17 going on 18 I still have flashbacks on everything that he had done too me over the years. Regretting it day by day that I never screamed for help, fought back, or told anyone sooner before it had went further. Even though I know that I shouldn't say this I blame myself for what happened too me. If I wasn't soo developed at the age of eight maybe he wouldn't have never looked or touched me the way that he did. But most of all I blame him because he's the reason why it's soo hard for me to trust and love someone. He's the reason I'm scared to have children, especially little girls because they may follow in my footsteps and get raped or molested like me and my mother did when we were kids. He's the reason I'm insecure about myself, I wonder everyday do people really like me for who I am, or do they just admire for things that I have. I'm scared to be alone with males by myself, I get weak-kneed everytime a male comes close to me and even tries to touch me.

  • Grace by Grace
  • 12 years ago

I'm 29 years old and the other day my husband and I were driving down the road and he turned to me out of the blue and said. You make me suffer because of your past you're hurting inside and won't let the past go so all the people that love you are getting the blunt of your hatred you bottle up inside. I never thought my hatred for my parents showed so bad. I don't know how to let the pain and anger go, but I don't want to lose my real family either though he said he would never go. This poem reminds me of many nights hiding under the covers with layers of cloths on huddling so close to the wall all curled up in ball just wishing the darkness wouldn't come in that night but night after night there he was with his filthy paws all over me . I couldn't even scrub hard enough when he was done. I don't trust very many people now and I put on a show for everyone to see. Nobody knows the hurt I'm holding inside at least so I thought. I tried therapy but that didn't work. I don't know what to do I'm drowning in my hatred and don't know where to go. They say I should forgive but I just can't find it in my heart to. My husband wants me to let him inside my crazy world but how do I let him in and does he really want to know. It's enough to turn your stomach.

  • Katie Bouvier by Katie Bouvier
  • 12 years ago

I was 12 when I was raped by my cousin at night, I was in my room and my parents where downstairs, I feared him. I was too scared to yell out or even move. I couldn't believe it, I didn't want to, I want this dream to end. I spoke up and lost faith in myself I didn't trust anyone and when I started to it happened all over again by another man. I still don't look at men the same and I'm scared to even be alone with them. I don't know what I did wrong...

  • Esther Keehn by Esther Keehn, East Earl
  • 8 years ago

precious girl...you did nothing wrong. You have scars from someone else's sin....scars that only God can heal. I will pray for you!

  • Lashawm Leighton Al by Lashawm Leighton Al
  • 12 years ago

I'm 17 I used to be in that situation but the only thing he did was touch me in the wrong place. I was pretty scared cause I didn't know what to do but I went to one of my friends and told an adult and I was thankful for that. Just keep your head up and know that God knows everything and that he loves you and will always be there for you.

  • Bb by Bb, United Kingdom
  • 12 years ago

Might be strange to see a guy on here, but the pain you suffer is dreadful, but please know this, to all the women and girls who post on here. I am 22 years old, male and from the age of 2 1/2 I was abused daily, sexually, physically and mentally. Not a day goes by where I don't wish my Stepfather was dead, but I thought to myself lets over come all this, so I am writing a book at this present time to help others realize there is always light at the end of the tunnel. Hopefully one day the best justice will be my success. I wish he had just hurt me, but he hurt my sister too, and she committed suicide because she couldn't cope any more. I miss her everyday, and I wish I could of saved her, but life isn't always a winning game. just reading through the comments on here I see how destructing this trauma can be. I hope everyone looks forward and realize that you can turn your lives around, I have and even though I'm a man. My heart goes out to every person who is ever hurt. <3

  • Amanda by Amanda, Ohio
  • 12 years ago

This story touched me. I was not raped, but I was molested when I was 11 years old, and it was horrible. I did not tell anyone for almost 3 years and when I did we got it taken care of but the guy did not get in any type of trouble. He is running free probably doing it to more girls. I was the 6th girl he did it to and I am sure there will be more. unfortunately there is nothing I can do about it but I wish I could.

  • Alaska by Alaska
  • 12 years ago

I am really sorry, I read your poem and many others and I couldn't believe how awful it was that girls were being abused like this.
Then I read the comments and discovered that there were more. I was almost blind to this before, I didn't know it happened so much.
Again, I am very sorry for what happened to you, to all of you. I would do anything to stop it. I really would.

  • Jessica by Jessica
  • 12 years ago

I got raped a year ago. I am only 11 years old and I got raped at 10 year old. I feel so different since I was 9. I am so sorry for all of you who got raped too. I know how you feel.

  • Anna by Anna, North Carolina
  • 12 years ago

I know how you feel. I was raped everynight since I was 5 and I know the pain. I never told because I was scared. I am now 14 and it's been 1 year since I last saw him. But I think about it all the time. Now I'm what people call an emo because I cut because of what he did to me.

  • Lisa Louise Lee by Lisa Louise Lee
  • 12 years ago

Hey my name is Lisa. I'm 15 I was sexually abused when I was 3. My dad was drunk one night and was stumbling around the house calling my name. He opened my bedroom door walking closer and closer towards me. He sat on my bed and then started touching me grabbing me forcing my body closer to his. It all stopped when I was 4. but some times when people get to close to me I can still feel his cold fingers all over me. and I get scared. I am 15 now and I have only told 3 friends and 1 teacher about this and no one else.

  • Maya by Maya, British Columbia
  • 12 years ago

When I was 5 years old my step father started raping me and he didn't stop until I was 11. I have never told anyone this I guess I am saying this now because no one I know will read this, but he came into my bedroom every night and during the day he would hurt me he was abusive and for the longest time I thought it was my fault that I deserved it, and when I realized it was not my fault I hated the world and now I am learning to deal with it. I haven't seen him in 2 years. I still have not told anyone about what he did because I'm scared. He told me over and over that if I told he would hurt me like never before and I believe him and I'm still scared I'm only 17 years old and I live by myself and every day I have to live with my past and I hope to any god out there that this never happens to any more girls.

  • Mercedes by Mercedes, California
  • 12 years ago

Hi everyone my name is Mercedes and I was molested by my uncle from age 4 all the way up until I was 13. I can't explain how scared and confused I was. When I had to live with him, it was the worst possible thing I had ever gone through. I would stay awake all night wondering if he was going to come in and take advantage of my innocence. He also would tell me to keep what was going on a secret, so since he was older than I was, I believed him and did not tell until I was 13.I was forced to have sex with him multiple times under my will. It did not matter if I tried to fight him off he would just force his body even more. He would throw me against the bed and take my clothes off. I still have major trust issues to this day.

  • Jessica. Usa by Jessica. Usa
  • 12 years ago

I know what this is like I had the same thing happen to me. It happend a lot more from the time I was 5 or before unill I was 13. I'm 16 now and I still have nightmares about it.

  • Charliann by Charliann, Texas
  • 12 years ago

Hey,
My name is Charliann I'm 13 years old. When I was 5 or 6 my step dad raped me. I did know what he was doing and I tried to stop him but I couldn't. When I was 10 my sister told me and my mom that he raped her my mom did not believe her. He raped me again when I was 11. I told my mom and she didn't believe me either now me and my sister live with my grandma and I will never see him again!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

  • Rose by Rose
  • 13 years ago

This poem really touched me, had me in tears. I could really relate to it, and made me realize that no matter how hard it is, you need to tell somebody. I read this and felt like screaming at the scream to tell somebody, but I understand most the time its just not that simple :/
I hope others read this and understand that this doesn't have to happen again and again. Make it stop from the start and tell somebody.

  • Jess by Jess
  • 13 years ago

when I was about 6 I was abused by my grandfather. I was at his house once and he touched me there and even at my own house when my family was home just outside he touched me too. I will never ever forget what he said "now, promise me you won't tell your mother. "I didn't tell a soul until he died. at his funeral I was sad because he was family but because I was relieved it would never happen again. I told my mother about a month after he died. I called her from my dads house in the middle of the night and I was crying and on the verge of screaming and she was just silent. I cant remember how that phone call ended. we haven't talked bout it since. I am 16 years old now. and I have only had one boyfriend. when we first kissed I just felt gross and I started crying. I only kissed him. I broke up with him. I made a promise to myself that I will remain a virgin until I am married. people laugh when I say that but they don't see why it is important to me. I don't trust anyone. How can I?

  • Tecora by Tecora, USA
  • 13 years ago

Hi, I'm 17 and I was raped by my mothers ex boyfriend at the age of 9. It tore me apart because I thought that he was suppose to be a father figure to me but instead he had his way with me and didn't even care.. I told my mother but at the time she was heavy on drugs that she didn't believe me so now that I am 17 I have to go to court and testify against him.. my mother is trying to say that I never told her but deep down she just doesn't want to admit that I said something and she did nothing.. But I know how all of you feel and this poem really touched me...

  • Amy by Amy, Illinois
  • 13 years ago

I'm sorry for what has happened to you. I understand of what you're going through b/c everynight I think to myself is this the night he will come to my room and hurt me? I've felt that same heart beat wondering to myself should I kill myself?

  • Clarissa by Clarissa, Boys And Girls Town Of Missouri
  • 13 years ago

My name is Clarissa and I was thirteen when I was sexually abused by my father. I had a boyfriend named Gary, and my dad soon found out about it because Gary lived with us. Well my dad pulled me into his room one night and said that if I wanted to do anything sexual with Gary then I had to do something sexual with him first. thinking I had no other option I did, I soon started to refuse, but then he forced me to do things. I had to put my hands and mouth in places that still give me nightmares...My answer to the hell in pain was cutting, I never was a big Jesus person, because I felt that through out that period of time he was ignoring me...I have a big heart for people who have pushed past trials in their life, I know that it is hard, I was 13 when I got put into the states custody and now I am almost 18. I am still working on handling things, because my family still thinks I'm a liar. But I believe in myself.

  • Barb Faber by Barb Faber
  • 13 years ago

I was 13 years old when my father first sexually assaulted me. He put his hands around my throat and threatened to kill me if I screamed. I lay there and prayed that God would let me die. The scars remain, but I am no longer a vulnerable child and am in charge of my own destiny. Sometimes the things in life that are so horrendous, make us stronger. We become survivors and show a great deal of compassion for others who suffer.

  • Analin by Analin, Guadalajara
  • 13 years ago

Hi my name is Analin I have been sexually touched and anything I can think of my cousin did this to me when I was 5 I was watching TV when he comes into my mom's room and he starts touching me I'm now 13 and I told my mom about just a couple of weeks ago when I came back from Mexico I was scared but he had done this to his sister and his cousins one of his cousins told me and I told her my story and we both started crying sometimes I feel like telling my boyfriend but I'm embarrassed that he will think bad things about me and he might want to do the same thing cause it's happened but whoever has been touched or anything don't be scared to tell your mom or a counselor try and say something don't be like me love you all!

  • Katy by Katy, Georgia
  • 13 years ago

I have been raped but I can see how you all feel, it is hard, my step brother, forced to me to mess with his "junk" and forced me to let him "play" with me... and then one day..... I was in a walmart bathroom... he came in there, and crawled under the stall, and forced me on the ground, and........

  • Kimberly by Kimberly, Ashland
  • 13 years ago

Hi, my name is Kim at the age of 16 and I just wanted to say gosh.. It's hard I never thought about how many people have actually been through what I have been through. I was sexually abused by three different people. My step father, and My two cousins. Ever since I was 8 they raped me over and over each day... If it wasn't one of them it was the other. Over and over again. I told one person which was a teacher. She told many.. and that lead me to foster care. I was in foster care for couple years then I was placed back into the hands of my step father and mom again. I told a second time and that's when they removed me for good and placed me with my bio-father. I just got out 8 months again. since then I've been through Akron Children's Hospital for suicide attempts and cutting. I realize now those aren't the key. The key to success is to get better in the mind and the head... I'm still working on it. It's part of your everyday life.... Thank you for sharing your story.

  • Heather by Heather
  • 13 years ago

I'm sorry. I haven't been through that but reading your poem has really upset me, and it hurts that something like that happened to you. It makes me want to be more careful about who I'm with, and about who I want my future daughter to be around. I'm sorry, and I don't think that should have happened to anyone. It hurts just thinking what you have went through, and I wish that could have been prevented for you.

  • Kelly by Kelly
  • 13 years ago

Hello, this story & poem touched me soo much that I ended reading it in tears. More because I know exactly what you went through. I know the exact feelings you went through because I went through this from 9-13 or 14 yrs of age. Every single day over & over again for over 5 yrs until I couldn't take it anymore. Once the news came about to my family they all blamed me for it; like it's a 9 yrs old fault. 'Till this day I still believe that some blame me for it. So I do feel for you %100 on this because I too went through it:(

  • Angela by Angela, Usa
  • 13 years ago

Hi, I am 18 years old. I was raped when I was three years old until I was six years old. I was raped by three cops, family members and people I didn't know. I was put in foster care and was beaten while I was there. Not only coming out of a house where I got beat and raped. I went into another house where I was chased down the road and beaten with sticks or whatever they were able to find. I'm writing this because I also understand what other people are going through because it is hard to forget it and forgive the people that did it to us.

  • Julie by Julie, Ohio
  • 13 years ago

Well I do know what It feels like, my dad raped me when I was 7. I am now thirteen and it hurts like hell all the pain I went through, I have been in the hospital over 6 times for trying to kill myself. plus my oldest sister was raped too by my dad, and she now has multiple personalities,( if you don't know what it is then please look it up cause it's hard to explain) our family is so screwed up I don't see my two oldest sisters because they think we made it up, so trust me I know! It puts you through hell it sucks bad! Any of you out there that haven't told please do, I will for you if you want me to, I want to help whoever I can so if you need help I'm here. Love Julie

  • Alyssa by Alyssa, USA
  • 13 years ago

I have never been rape or abused. But I feel really bad for all of you that have been or are being today. I wish their was something I could do to help but there is nothing a 13 year old girl could do. So I wish the best of you and that whoever has hurt you in any way that they be punished in the worst of ways.

  • Keely F by Keely F, Canada
  • 13 years ago

Hey, I have never been sexually abused in any way, but reading this poem and all your stories made me cry! Please remember God is always with you and will help you no matter what!
All of you are wonderful people who didn't/don't deserve that! It's heartbreaking. Just hold your head high and know your worth more then that.

  • Dani by Dani
  • 13 years ago

Hey, I am 18 yrs old and I know exactly how you feel. Those are the same thoughts that run through my mind everyday. You see, when I was about 4 or 5, my stepfather raped me. It continued until recently when I turned 18 and was able to move out. The abuse was unbearable, he used things, he allowed his friends to join in his lude acts and he recorded it all for memoir purposes. I have a 1 month old daughter whose father is also her grandfather.
Like you I was afraid that no one would understand or even take the time to listed to my problems. They seemed so un-important and inconvienient at the time, at least that's what I would tell myself to justify the ignorance of everyone else. Even though NO ONE should ever have to go through this, it gives me strength knowing that I am not alone and that through my story I can be that helping hand or that shield of armor through their darkest times. Just like you are being with this poem. So thank you. For fighting.

  • Pennsylvaina by Pennsylvaina
  • 13 years ago

I got raped 7 times by the same guy. And I'm 14 turning 15 and I have 2 kids. I feel your pain. When I go out to hang with my bf since I was 10 when he touches me I think its the guy touching me so I hurry up and move away. I wake up and sees his face in my dreams it hurts me and I scream and wake my kids up. But like I said I feel your pain right there.

  • Andrea Lynn by Andrea Lynn, FL
  • 13 years ago

Hey I'm 19 years old and I feel you. I was abused and raped by my father from 8 years old to 16. I was so scared of him I wasn't allowed to talk to anyone in school or watch health videos that had anything to do with sex, abuse, rape, or anythng. He told me that he is supposed to do this to prepare me for the future..that's what he kept putting in my head. I tred to say something in school but the words "I'LL KILL YOU IF YOU SAY ANYTHING THIS STAYS BETWEEN ME AND YOU IT'S OUR LITTLE SECRET" never left my mind. I didn't know what to do I tried putting him in jail but he got out a month later on a half a million bond. The reason the D.A. told me was that it was my fault to wait so long to say anything to anybody. But what could I have done when I'm scared for my life.
I feel like I did something wrong. I keep blaming myself. I wake up everyday knowing what I know, trying so hard to keep this smile upon my face ..well I can truly say I know how you feel and I hope you stay strong.

  • Yamila by Yamila, Mobile AL
  • 13 years ago

Hey I'm 17 years old and I'm Cuban. When I was 14 my uncle kind of was drunk and touched me while he was in my room and my bed! He was so cool, he was the best uncle I knew until he did that..my life is so confused no one knows but my boyfriend. My life is so messed up now, I'm so misunderstood. I just want to die but I don't want to kill myself. I understand what you went through but you know what hun he will get what he deserves don't let him ruin you because it makes him stronger. I mean idk if he's dead or alive now but just live your life sweetie trust me you'll be happy one day!:)

  • Bella by Bella, Geelong Australia
  • 13 years ago

I liked your story but its really sad :( I'm 14 my brother raped me over and over again since I was about 8. I never told any one until last year. She freaked out. Now a few people know but they think I should just get over it. I didn't even know what he was doing to me was wrong until I was 10. Only 2 of the people I have told know who it was and I sit there every day while the others discuss how good looking he is. I don't think he will ever do it to me again but he still lives here and I'm scared. No one in my family knows and not one of my friends understand and now there is not even that, they just left me and now I'm alone :'( and its horrible

  • Jessie by Jessie
  • 13 years ago

I am no position to speak I can't even comprehend the pain you are going through. The world is full of terrible people, with sick screwed up minds. But remember there are people who love you. Hold your head high. do not be ashamed of what he did, you are a strong independent woman. I admire you for ever and always

  • North by North, Carilona
  • 13 years ago

Hey.
For everyone out there who was raped I'm sorry I was molested but never raped. Keep you head held high and don't ever say NEVER you will fulfill your dreams and iloveyouall.<333

  • Samantha Baraga by Samantha Baraga
  • 13 years ago

wow...all these people are right you are a really good writer. I don't really know what it feels like to be raped but I know what the situation is like! I have lived with someone that was a rapist for several years! but don't let that stop you from filling your dreams because everyone has a lot to live for. keep your head held high(:

  • Becca by Becca, Vermont
  • 13 years ago

I am 16 now and I know how you feel. since I was 5; the earliest I remember at least, I was sexually abused by my dad. and all I have to say is that things aren't going to be easy for you. the rest of your life this will follow you but it is YOU that decides how it will affect you. you choose to let it bother you, you choose how to handle it. and I know that you probably felt like it only happens to you but it doesn't, there are many of us out there Hun, and you just have to remember that its not your fault. but no one can tell you or force you to think that, it's something that you have to realize on your own. your past only makes you stronger.

  • Shannon by Shannon
  • 14 years ago

I actually know how yall all feel. I was 7 when I went into a cici's bathroom, and this man came in calling "lil girl". I thought he might have a daughter in there but he didn't. he came for me. it was horrible. I never said a word to anyone... :'(

  • Kayla by Kayla, Washington
  • 14 years ago

I am soooooo sorry! I can't even speak. I feel violated and it wasn't even me, but your story touched me and I hope to god he's dead because he doesn't deserve life for what he did! but I will pray for you if he's still alive and please be careful!

  • Carmen by Carmen
  • 14 years ago

I am 16 years old and I was raped for 13 years and I have never told anyone this untill 6 months ago. my uncle, dad, and brothers all had a part in this. I would cover up the pain and hurt with drugs and self harm but one day finally I had enough of it and I settled down and told a close friend what had been going on for the past 13 years of my life and she did the right thing with telling someone even though I didn't want her to, but now I am getting the help I need. and putting the people who did it away for a very long TIME..........

  • Letty by Letty, California
  • 14 years ago

hey girl my name is Letty and I could understand what you're going thru, I was in kindergarten when my uncle decided to touch me, and let me tell you, the only person who can take that pain away is God, don't ever loose your faith he loves you, I trusted homegirl and he gave me the strength to forgive my uncle

  • Jessica by Jessica, USA
  • 14 years ago

I am 14 years old and I understand what you guys are going through because I have an uncle that used to be on drugs and stuff and he kept asking me if I wanted to have sex with him and asked me if I wanted to see his junk and after I had suffered for a few months over him doing this to me and about two months ago I finally gathered enough nerves to tell my mother about it and it was hard for her because he is her brother and she knew that he did drugs and stuff but she would have never guessed that he would have done something like this to his own niece!
For all you people that think it is cool to do this to people. You can't even imagine what all the rape victims have to go thru after you have done this to them. You have scarred them for a lifetime and no matter how sorry you are, you can never take back the pain and suffering you have caused them!

  • Gabriel Blanton by Gabriel Blanton, South Carolina
  • 14 years ago

I was four when my father took away a part of me. He didn't rape me but he did touch me enough to screw with my head. I keep falling for guys who touch me and leave me and I continue to accept it. But that's not the life I want to live at 15. I told but I still aint ready to trust any male. So I lay there each time and beg it to be over, or I say no and each time they push me into saying yes. I would never wish this on anyone, but I do wish someone would understand.

  • Shelby by Shelby, Glasgow
  • 14 years ago

Hi, my name is Shelby I am 16 years old I loved your story.
I was raped when I was 6 and then I got raped 3 other time 1=14 , 2=15, 3=16 and one was by my boyfriend. I got pregnant but then I lost it. I got a 2 year old little girl and she is the light of my life I love her and my new boyfriend is helping me.
Thanks for sharing your feeling I know how it feels, it hurts and it will always haunt you for the rest of your life

  • Kersty by Kersty
  • 14 years ago

Hi I'm 16 and I know how you feel. Same thing almost happened to me when I was ten. He never fully, but he forced me to touch places and touch certain areas on me too. I felt so worthless and scared. At time I felt like it was my fault that it had happened to me. That if only I was this or that I wouldn't have nothing like that happen.

  • Beatriz by Beatriz
  • 14 years ago

Wow your poem really got to me.. I've never been raped don't know what its like, I can't even put myself in your shoes. But your poem for some reason gave me that feeling, put me in your room hearing the door, the screams and cries, I have a whole new point of view on rape I'm sorry for everything you've been through and I'm glad you still believe in God he is the only one out there for us. and I just wanted to let you know you're an awesome writer!

  • Tasha by Tasha
  • 14 years ago

I'm 18 years old but I was raped the summer before my freshman year.
I drank at my cousins house and my cousin put me in his room well someone was hurt so instead of checking on me he sent his bff who sent this guy to check on me.
Well, I wasn't so far gone to know what was happening. I fought the best way I could until my cousin walked in and pulled him off but it was too late because he just finished.
I never told anyone because I didn't know how to. My cousin knew and he helped me the best, but still I have problems in a relationship... I thought I'd let you know you're not alone.

Back to Top