Spend Time With Those You Love

I am seventeen, and am losing my father to cancer. I am writing this poem to him, in hopes that it inspires others to not waste time, and let go of the past. I will forever had to live with all the time I wasted when I could have been there, loving him. Please learn from my mistake.

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This poem is very strong. I am loosing my father as I write this. He is in the ICU unable to breath on his own and its just a matter of time till I loose him. And I am not ready. I am only 18...

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I'm Sorry Dad

Published by Family Friend Poems July 2008 with permission of the Author.

Dad,
I sit awake at night
Crying... Waiting.
I don't want to get that call.
I know that I'm selfish, but God only knows how much I still need you here!
I'm not ready to let go.
I'm so sad, yet so angry at you!
Why weren't you there!?
Why didn't you make more of an effort!?
How could you let so much time go by!?
I sit here now,
Crying.
Thinking of you.
Damn you!
You're supposed to watch me grow older...
You're supposed to walk me down the aisle!
What am I supposed to do?
I'm so alone.
I know that I have made a lot of mistakes, and that I to let so much time go.
I'm Sorry.
I'm sorry that I wasn't there.
I'm sorry that it took me this long to see.
I'm sorry that I can't get over the past.
I'm sorry that I'm just not realizing how much you really mean to me.
I love you, Dad.
I just want a second chance.
And I want to say that everything is going to be okay, that everything is going to be fine... You will come home and get better, and we will go horseback riding again, or play yatzee, or order a pizza and watch a movie together!
But I know that it's not okay.
I know that what I want isn't going to happen.
I just wish I could save you.
I wish that I could go back and be there.
And now I have to live with myself for the things that have happened.
I just want you to know before, that I always loved you, and will continue to...
No matter the outcome, I want you to know that I'm here for you!
I love you Dad.
Don't forget about me.

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by Codi Smith
13 years ago

This poem is very strong. I am loosing my father as I write this. He is in the ICU unable to breath on his own and its just a matter of time till I loose him. And I am not ready. I am only 18 just turned it. I don't think anyone is ever really ready to loose a parent but life takes it's toll. And unfortunately if you don't take good care of yourself that will be the out come. My father had many chances to change his way of life and he didn't. And I was a little angry with him but you can't force anyone to do anything they don't want to do. All you can do is keep them close and remind them you love them...