Divorce Poem

Timeless Question: "My parents got divorced, but why'd I lose my dad?"

Through the Eyes Of A Child

© Brianna K. Slone
When I was only two years old,
My daddy went away.
He swore he'd always love me,
But he said he couldn't stay.
Days turned into weeks
And weeks turned into years.
I never saw my father,
He never saw my tears.
He never read me bedtime stories
Or tucked me in at night.
He never showed up for my birthdays,
But I always hoped he might.
He missed my first day of kindergarten
And all of my school plays.
He doesn't know how smart I am,
My report cards full of A's.
Sometimes I want to call him
To say Hey Dad I'm still alive!
I'll be 16 years old soon,
Will you teach me how to drive?
It’s almost time for college,
The years go by so fast.
I'm looking forward to my future,
But I'm still trapped within my past.
I guess I'll never understand,
Did I do something bad?
My parents got divorced,
But why did I lose my dad?

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Published: Feb 2006

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  • Well I was 8 years old my dad was a druggie he would go and get high with our house payment so we ended up having very little to eat he missed my birthday to get high with his friend he took all my birthday money with him so I waited up all night for him and he never came but now I hate him more the anything I am almost 13 now but what he has said and done I just can't forget so I was left to sit through life my mom later ended up marrying some guy after only a few months she was later pregnant but now 5 years later we are back where we started and they are getting a divorce I am starting a new school everyone stares at me here I don't like it but hey when life obviously doesn't like you you just have to take it and hope one day you can escape but it doesn't matter anymore I just am tired of being on earth why can't god end it now. I must be good for something but I don't know what but whatever!

    Alex Submitted Dec 2008
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  • Hi Alex,
    I went through many of my Mother's divorces with her...My mom has been married 5 times. I am now 25 and married and you know what I discovered? You have to learn through your parents mistakes. Take whatever happens and apply it to your own life and avoid making the same mistakes when you get older. You are good for something...you are good for your Mom who is enduring a lot of pain and your little brother or sister who needs your strength. You are going to follow your own path. I have taken all of my life experiences and pain and turned them into something wonderful for myself and my children and my marriage. Best of luck to you Alex and keep your chin up :)

    Teresa Submitted Jan 2009
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  • my parents divorced when I was two. I never really got over how my dad got remarried so quickly. my dad gave me up when I was eight, I haven't seen my family in seven years. my mom got remarried and I was adopted, I was abused in many ways by my new father.
    I love this poem because I can relate.

    michaela Submitted Feb 2009
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  • I'm among the lucky ones who've never been through this kind o pain before...
    after reading this poem, I cried. it's because I've never thought that kids who lives in a broken family would suffer from this kind of pain... I have a friend who is suffering like this... she cries every time when we talk about family matters.. now, after reading this poem, I know how she feels…

    anna Submitted Feb 2009
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  • When I was 2 years old my mother and father got into a fight and he left. I saw him again when I was seven but that was the last time. I cried a lot because I wanted to know him so bad. I wonder if he had more kids and just forgot about me I don't even know if he's still alive. I wish till this day that he loved me but that ill never know. I'm 18 in college and I'm so proud of my success I thank my mother and my god father without them I would be nothing.
    I Love your poem and I can relate to it a hundred percent......

    kris Submitted Mar 2009
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  • Hey I read this and tears filled my eyes. My parents are divorced and my mum has 7 kids 5 from him and 2 from another man who lives with us. My mum and dad split up about 6-7 years ago yet it still feels like yesterday because they are always arguing it is horrible but I still feel for people it happens to x

    katie Submitted Mar 2009
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  • my parents went thru a divorce to and I am so glad I read this because I needed for myself! oh... thank you so much!

    Cody Cherpin Submitted Sep 2009
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  • I can really relate to this poem because my parents got divorced when I was five. And now my dad has cancer and I hardly see him. I want to call him and ask him why he doesn't call or why he doesn't send me a card on my birthday. but every time I hear his voice mixed emotions run through my head. love, hate, anger, questions

    Madi Submitted Dec 2009
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  • This poem touched me. My parents are divorced. I understand. I don't know why I lost my dad either. and like you said sometimes I just want to call him and tell him that I'm still here and alive! thanks for sharing your story. I know how you feel.

    Kayla, Lancaster PA Submitted Apr 2010
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  • my mom and dad are divorced. I don't see my dad, I have a younger brother and a few older. My mom struggles everyday with money/bills while my dad has a lot of money. I am only in my teens. I don't know where he is, how he is or how I feel about him - love, hatred, sadness. Sometimes I cry a lot because I hate to think what my mom is going through and how my father was in our lives one day, and he was gone the next, no warning, no calls, nothing. I know how you feel.

    Louisianne, California Submitted Oct 2010
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  • This poem has touched me because I have been through 2 divorces. Luckily my father stayed, but things went wrong and he began an addiction to alcohol. and now I'm left to deal with being in a foster home.

    Stacy, Coventry Submitted Dec 2010
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  • My parents divorced when I was the age 7. Now I am 16 years old. The results of the divorce is two separate homes, a sister on my father's side and my mom has a dumb ass boyfriend who I don't give a damn about. Her boyfriend is useless and isn't worth a dime and he's the reason why my parents split I really dislike him and wouldn't care if he disappeared!!!!

    Anonymous, Wi Submitted Mar 2011
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  • My mom and dad have never gotten along. They were always arguing and sometimes brought me into it. My mom said he never even smiled at there wedding and didn't want to kiss her. I'm 12 years old, and today my father announced he will be moving out. I asked him where he will go, and he said he would stay with his best friend, who I call uncle. I asked when he would be leaving and he replied tomorrow or maybe even tonight. I ran out of the room and into my room where I hid under my bed. He came in a few minutes later and called my name. I came out and I ran to hug him. I heard him choke up and the cried. He said he would still see me sometimes. He was a wonderful father when I was a toddler/baby. When I got to be about 7 years old he stopped. I'm an only child who was always surrounded by kids whose parents where divorced or separated. I always said I wanted my dad to move out, and I think it's for the best, but I'm gonna miss being tickled till I cried whenever I was upset. I love you dad.

    Hope, USA Submitted Mar 2011
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  • When my mom was pregnant with me my dad cheated on her then decided he didn't want a family and left with hardly a goodbye. He visited when I was 2. Then I didn't see him again until I was 5. The he disappeared. I turned 16 in April and felt like something was missing so I looked him up and found him. Finally getting to know the man that helped bring me into the world is rough. I'm getting so many of my questions answered though and I found out that he regrets every day what he did. I have two little brothers too! No it's not perfect now and I've spent many days crying. It's not an easy road but I'm willing to do this so maybe one day I won't have to wonder about him and we can finally be a family.

    Katie, Michigan Submitted Jun 2011
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  • Hope. I got a story kind of like that. My mom and dad always fought. My dad is now staying at my aunts and I miss him so very much. We get to go and spend the night two days a week. They always fought and one time my mom just called my granny my papaw and my cousin. My sister was so sad she wasn't even eating her dinner. I love him so much. Love you daddy!

    Kaitlyn. USA Submitted Jul 2011
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  • I was two when my parents got divorced. I'm 14 now, and just found out the truth of WHY they did. I found out my dad cheated. And all the pieces I didn't understand came clear. It explained why my dad was ''dating'' so quickly. It was the woman he cheated on my mom with. I understood why my mom hated my dad. He beat her and neglected me... I discovered why I hated my dad. It was because I finally saw that he was never there for me. That he had no excuse... But the ''excuse'' that hurt the most... "you can't come over this weekend. The Family is coming over." and that's why I used to be suicidal... I felt unloved. Like the daddy's girl with no daddy. But, I figured out that I have my mom who loves me enough for two parents. And while I still wish I had a dad who loved me, it's enough. And now, while the depression's still there, I have a newfound respect for my life.

    Abbi, Michigan Submitted Aug 2011
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  • I'm 14 yrs old now my parents have been divorced since I was 6. I went through the normal trauma or having your parents recently divorce I thought that I was all me I was the one to blame. I thought that if I was gone everything would be ok afterwards I didn't talk to no one for months about my parents. I couldn't deal with it. I went from being this happy little girl to this girl who just stopped being so happy and open to quiet and bad ever since I was 6 everything went down hill my grades dropped I had poor attendance at school and I still do. I am still recovering from their divorce but it's very hard to deal with. Especially since my dad is remarried and my mom is trying to find someone who isn't a jerk. I can't talk to my dad about it honestly cause he has a drinking problem and used to be abusive and now that he has a new wife it's even harder. They have been married for about 5 years now and I still can't deal with it its depressing.

    April Bryant Submitted Aug 2011
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  • I am 47 years old and my parents divorced when I just turned 16 years old, after having 7 children. I wished they did it earlier then I would not have needed to see Love Die in such a destructive way. My Dad was Aloof/Poor Me in manner, but was a Womanizer. My Mom was an Intimidator/Interrogator and a Heavy Drinker. Growing up I took on my dads nature and my Mom treated me the way she treated my Dad, with detest! As I grew older I realized I took on all my Parents mannerisms. I now realize why I chose them as my parents as they had a lot to teach and show me about their lives together and to get a better understanding of what they really wanted instead of what they got out of the Marriage and Relationship. I needed a balance to get me through life. I needed the Good and the Bad! I can now choose to Love for myself as it is a choice how we choose to feel about a situation.

    Manchester Submitted Sep 2011
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  • Hi,
    I am a single mom of 8 years old son, My eyes filled with tears, while I was reading this poem. I can feel the pain of my son's heart. We were separated when he was 3, and then I decided to go back to his dad only for my son, but he was still a bad husband and bad and irresponsible dad. We again got separated when he was 7.5 years old. My son always says that he doesn't want to go back to his dad, and even always refuses to talk to him over the phone. But still I can understand his feelings. Parents are also not happy with this situation, but it's better than fighting in front of the kids every day and also a good way to keep kids away from bad manners, I hope you can understand your parents too!!! And I would appreciate if you give some suggestions about how can I make my son happy and feel good.
    Thanks

    Jas, Surrey Submitted Sep 2011
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  • This poem brings back memories. My older husband divorced me to marry a girl younger than our children. As a result I lost not only most of my property and all my rights but also both my children - one to death and the other to a very dangerous cult. The children hurt; the faithful spouse hurts and ultimately, Society hurts. Men should never take a young girl out of her family home to abuse her. If they have no integrity, they should not marry or procreate to torture!

    A Covenant-Wife: Trinidad Submitted Sep 2011
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  • I went through the same thing. Except my dad wasn't a druggie, he was a drunk and he used to make fun of my mom, my sister, my brother, and me. Let me tell you I'm writing this crying. He used to call my sister a pig ''cause my sister was a little chubby. He told my brother he could play volleyball with him. He called my mother names in front of his family just for laughs. Except, for us, they weren't laughs, they were cries. One school day when I was 5 I had to witness the divorcι. There was screaming, throwing, hitting. I didn't see my dad anymore after he left.

    Luis Leon Submitted Sep 2011
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  • Well my dad left me when I was 1 or 2 and after he never bothered to call until he found me on the internet and then he called. I was so excited but then he started calling me more often but then it got to the point where I heard a women and kids in the background and I asked him who's that he said who? I said that women and those kids he said oh it's my family. Then I got sad and told him well you didn't forget about me did you he said in a funny voice laughing he said no silly I told him well then why are you laughing he said I don't know its just funny you will say that kind of things. But after awhile he never bothered to call and I felt sad I started to cry then my mom said she would always protect me but it got to the point where I got... and I started to cut myself and went all being so emotional and stuff. but ya that's my story and I would say more but I really don't wanna waste who ever is reading this time.

    Long Beach Submitted Sep 2011
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  • My parents recently divorced after a long 4 year battle with adultery. My dad went through years of therapy, and never changed. My mom has been managing pretty well, but his portion of the custody kills her. He made my younger sister cry the other day, because she was venting about him calling all the time when he's hurt us so much, and he was listening. She cried and cried, and I called him and we yelled and screamed. I sometimes sit alone at night and wonder why this possibly could have happened to my family, and I realize that we're supposed to learn. My current boyfriend is nothing but sweet. He understands my problems and tells me he's here for me. So for all of you struggling with this, just remember that even though they didn't work out, it doesn't mean you will. Let it out, cry, scream- but when it comes down to it there's another person out there waiting to comfort you. You've just gotta find them, and not make the same mistakes.

    Mississippi Submitted Dec 2011
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  • My dad is a big drunk, he hates my guts and loves my brother which hurts me really bad because I did nothing and him and his family all treat me horrible.....I'm just about to turn 12 and my parents got divorced when I was about 6, they decided to get back together a bunch of times then separate, which made it worse. I have to go to my dads house every other weekend, but am treated like crap for every minute of it.-----And as for Jas, Surrey or whatever, to help your son feel better you should absolutely NEVER talk bad about his dad in front of him, it will make him think you want him to hate his dad. Another thing is encourage him to talk to his dad, but don't force him. When he needs to go visit his dad just say, "I bet you'll have fun," and tell him fun stuff that they might be able to do. Slowly encourage him to spend time with his dad and hopefully they can eventually have a good relationship:)

    Unknown Submitted Dec 2011
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  • When I was 1 my younger sister was born and that was when my father began drinking and taking drugs 24/7... When I was three, my mother went to work and she left us (my little sister and I) in my fathers care but when she got home (during a freezing cold winter) my sister and I were outside only in our nappies and we were playing in the streets while my father was half stoned half drunk on the couch... He beat my mother and me and my mother took us kids and left him...on my 4th birthday, my parents got a divorce and even to this day (I am 14 now) my father missed EVERYTHING in my childhood...

    Ashleigh Submitted Dec 2011
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  • My mum and dad have divorced after 15 years in marriage and my mum managed to marry quickly after that. My childhood means a lot to me because I'm having a hard time at school and looking back makes me feel happy but my mum remarried some guy I don't even care about soo quick! He is much younger than my mum and I believe he only cares about himself.. He doesn't like me so he is trying to make my mum against me which make me feel depressed and isolated. I need help but I'm too scared to ask for it because if I do I'm scared my mum might leave me like she did my dad for this horrid stepdad.. :(

    Anna Submitted Jan 2012
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  • I just read all your comments and my heart aches for everyone. I grew up in a home where my mom & stepdad were always fighting. My real dad died when I was 1 and he used to physically abuse her. I grew up feeling unloved and suffered from depression. Since I was 12, I knew what I wanted in a spouse: fidelity, no addictions and for him to be responsible. I thank God that I found and married my husband. I continued to battle depression until one day I came to the realization that only I, with the help of God, could make my life worthwhile. I now have 2 amazing teenage kids and my greatest goal in life is to be the best mom I could ever be. I decided to bless others and stop living in the past. You were all born with a great purpose in life. Use your negative experiences to help others who have not reached that level yet. You are priceless. Only God can free you from all the ugly and give you a new beginning. Find your purpose, embrace it, and bless others with your presence.

    Sheila, Miami, Fl Submitted Feb 2012
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  • My parents are still together but my older half brother lost his dad. His dad and my mum were married and split up and he never saw his dad, I found out that his dad died of a brain tumor a few years ago and he did see him before he died. My brother is now 40 and I guess I have been drawn to the fact that unlike me his dad was never there for him and my dad was not very good to him.
    I have fallen out with my brother recently but it seems to me what we argued about revolves around his life without his father. He does not have a father who was always there for him. I think my dad tried to do his bit but my dad drinks and is not good at these things.
    What can I do for my brother?

    I struggle with relationships too, every one I have I am cheated on and once I was so sure that I would be cheated on I did it first to stop it feeling so bad. I can't seem to stop the cycle but girls just seem drawn away from me and end up hooking up with someone else.

    James, UK Submitted Feb 2012
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  • I never thought that my parents would break up. Then when I went to sleep at night I heard my dad get home later, then my mum and dad use to fight with each other saying that my dad was cheating on her. One day I came home from school and my dad drove away, my mum was crying and I didn't know what to do, it turned out that they divorced. Soon as that was over my dad moved on so fast and is now married to another lady, my step mum talks about my mum and says rude things about her behind my back, the thing is my older brother has a different mum too and my dad has moved on from them to my mum and then moved on from us to another lady. I HATE MY LIFE!!!!!!! now because my step mum says stuff that I don't like I live with my mum, my dad told me he will call but he never does.. I don't know if he hates me or what.. WHAT SHOULD I DO!?!?!?!?

    Samantha, Townsvile Submitted Mar 2012
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  • I can relate to you Samantha my step mom does the same thing. I was 13 when my dad left I know I had him in my childhood but I needed him know more than ever. I guesses bad things happen and we can't explain why....also I don't go to my dads house because I end up getting into arguments with his girlfriend cuz not only does she talk about me and my mom but my baby sisters and that hurts. My dad took her side over mine says he loves me doesn't show it. I wouldn't fret on waiting for your dad to call..it only gets you depressed and makes you get gray hairs really bad!!!! I learned just to keep my head up I'm 15 years old and my dad still hasn't called it's been 2 years......

    Saria,San Antonio Texas Submitted Mar 2012
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  • I can relate to this poem as when I was one my father left me and my mother and brother. I saw him once or twice after that but then never again. When I was nearly nine my mom met her partner. She got pregnant with my 2nd brother who was born in 2006. When I was 10 I was stupid enough to ask to see him again. I saw him a few times but he eventually told me and my older brother that his new girlfriend was more important than us. I never saw him again. My mom had another baby boy in 2007 with her partner, but later that year my "father" got married and didn't even tell us. I feel hurt and jealous because everyone else I know has a father or even if they're split up they still see them. I just wanted a relationship with my dad that other girls had but that can never happen. He can go die for all I care.

    Lucy,Co. Louth, Ireland Submitted May 2012
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  • My wife, my two kids and I lived in Florida. My son Alex was 2 and my daughter Lisa was nine. Alex was sick a lot. Then I was offered a much better paying job in California, and it offered excellent medical coverage for my kids - something I didn't have in Florida. My wife and I agreed I should take it. She told me to get settled and she would join me with our kids.

    I moved, and found a nice apartment for us. But then my wife said she'd changed her mind and filed for divorce. She knew I wouldn't quit a job and leave Alex with no medical coverage. We had an autodial phone and Alex knew which button was me. I'd get calls late at night and my little boy would ask me "Daddy why you no come home? Why you no be here?"

    That little voice would cut into me like a knife every time. How could I tell my little boy that his Mom had betrayed me?

    That was 19 yeas ago. My kids are now adults. But sometimes I still hear that little voice at night. "Daddy why you no come home?"

    Carlos, Oakland California Submitted May 2012
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  • From the very first line in this poem I was caught of guard. I came here for help and now I cant stop sobbing. The only thing is I'm the father faced with destroying my innocent 3 year old she's so innocent so beautiful smart and talented I love her so much I also have a newborn 2 weeks same mom and an 8 year old son different mom. I lost my son at a year old and was only allowed to see him every other Sat and Sun 8-5 my heart bled every agonizing drive that we took to his moms house. I always wanted to drive so slow to cherish what little time we had left but all it would do was bring up the pain that we both felt and at some point on the drive one of us would burst in to tears. Maybe that's why when I had my daughter I was so swept away by her but now I'm finding out that I never forgave her mom for cheating on me early on in our relationship and I know how damaging it is and unhealthy for daughter but I don't know if I can bare to loose her and my new son the way I lost my first born.

    J, Stockton, CA Submitted Jun 2012
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  • Even more I can't bare to break her Heart. I know not what to do because I would go through an eternity of agony for her but I'm also charged with the responsibility of a roll model and teacher to her which means I have to choose what's best for her and part of which is showing her not to stay in a dysfunctional relationship. I am so lost please help I want to know what the daughters that lived through this poem would want. Please help me save my daughter from this kind of pain.

    J, Stockton, CA Submitted Jun 2012
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  • Even more I can't bare to break her Heart. I know not what to do because I would go through an eternity of agony for her but I'm also charged with the responsibility of a roll model and teacher to her which means I have to choose what's best for her and part of which is showing her not to stay in a dysfunctional relationship. I am so lost please help. I want to know what the daughters that lived through this poem would want. Please help me save my daughter from this kind of pain.

    J, Stockton Ca Submitted Jun 2012
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  • I'm a mother of a 13 year old daughter. We got divorced when she was only 6 months old. Her story is much the same as in the poem. Her dad disappeared for 11 yrs & 2 yrs ago she begged me to find him for her birthday, which I did. He was full of promises and saw her for 6 months on and off. However after the 6 months he disappeared out of her life completely again. The emotional scars he left was so bad! She even attempted suicide, twice! All she ever wanted was for him to love her and be a part of her life. Now, its almost her birthday again...and her ONLY wish, to see her dad! I found him yet again, but from experience I have learnt that this is not going to end up differently! How do I protect her from the heartache that is coming?

    J V Tonder Submitted Jun 2012
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  • When I was 9, my parents got a divorce. My dad cheated on my mom with his brothers wife. So now I have a aunt/step mom. Well, I wanted to live with my mom, but she was on drugs and my dad is an alcoholic. I am stuck with them fighting for me. I cry almost everyday. I am trying to get over it! It's really hard, though. But, just remember everything will get better in time! Keep praying and hope for the best! Keep me in your prayers!!

    Leanne, Mississippi Submitted Jul 2012
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  • I am 10 years old and my father left when I was two, I'm writing this while my parents are arguing, they moved back together when I turned nine. 3 minutes ago my mom just threw a purse at daddy. I have been ok in those years they were apart but, I HATE it when my daddy says mommy is ignorant, stupid, and dumb. My mommy say daddy has big a$$ lips and stuff, and they cuss. He doesn't even know I am an excellent painter and artist. My mom doesn't either, they're too busy cussing at each other and throwing stuff. I even think I Might belong to another family, but my mom says no. I ask if I was an accident, before I was born they were arguing, I'm so upset right now.

    Chelsea, Tx Submitted Jul 2012
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  • I was three when my mom and dad got a divorce.... I remember the terrible fight they had. One time my mom goy a knife held in a napkin and said she was going to kill herself right in front of me. I was scared. She never did it though. My dad got custody over my siblings and I. We have money problems. Once in a while my mom will send birthday cards to us ... Usually they are late. One time mom said she was going to pick us up. She never showed. My grandma and dad was trying to call her but he would never pick up the phone... Three years went by and I swore that her boyfriend had actually killed her. I would cry often. My friends mom asked about my mom and then I told her I hadn't seen her in three years. She just hugged me for about a minute and said she was sorry. She saw the pain in my eyes... And my own mother couldn't? Well maybe she could she just doesn't care. She finally called one day and said that she was sick. Well after it was four years she came and picked us up.

    Rilynn Submitted Jul 2012
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  • This page has been very touching, from the poem to the user comments. My ex recently left me without much warning and one day just stopped answering my calls or messages. I am very close to my daughters and haven't been able to see them for months. I really want to see them but the mom is punishing me by keeping the kids away from me. The kids have always had a better bond with me than with her, and they are known to be daddy's girls. I feel she is alienating my children from me so they won't want to come live with me when they grow up. I am currently working through the family court system to get steady visitation with my daughter. I used to see her almost everyday and had consistent visitation with my daughter almost 3-4 days a week. So kids, if you are in a situation like the ones described above, please remember that sometimes its not your dad's fault. Reach out to your parent, try to have a relationship with them. Forgive them.

    Portland Dad Submitted Jul 2012
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  • Hello there kids and moms, my ex also left us. He left saying it was my fault having affair and remarried within 3 months getting the divorce final. Though he claims its my fault funny part he was with someone during that time and said he need someone to take care of him when he is old. So fast and so cheap his love was for his family. I always ask my daughter just keep talk to him via phone as he cant be bothered to see her alone saying he is married and will come with his new wife. She is also woman that broke our family intentionally ,knowing that we wanted to be together I wrote her sms and she knew that we are battling to keep the family together but she insist to marry him and break our family. So how can my daughter want to be with her and now he has a child coming soon, My god our heart just shattered into pieces especially my daughter. As his wife has already a kid from her former marriage. he has neglected her a lot for his new wife and now new kids coming. We are keeping away from him as he never stop hurt us. The past never stops haunting us though we want to move on:)

    Loraine Submitted Aug 2012
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  • This Poem moves me because my parents divorced when I was 5. My dad never fully left me but my mom kept me from him as much as possible. When I was that young I became severely depressed. I wanted to die because I thought I was the reason they were getting a divorce. My parents always just told me they fought a lot. My mom blamed my dad, said he was a slob who wouldn't get a job. My dad never said anything bad about my mom. I was really sick as a baby & my dad stayed home with me. I just recently found out she wasn't the saint she claims to be. One of the main reasons for the divorce was SHE cheated on my dad a lot, starting the first year they were married. My dad wasn't perfect either and I know that but he admitted it to me, she hasn't. I'm in college now and I still don't know if my daddy is my father. I don't want to know really, he was always there for me. That doesn't mean I don't know the pain...I still rarely got to see him. I wish that now after being divorced 12 years they would be civil but they aren't.

    H., Texas Submitted Aug 2012
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  • My dad told me today that he and my mum are splitting up. I don't even know how to feel.

    Roxy Submitted Sep 2012
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  • I just went through a divorce. My wife just wasn't happy. tried everything I could to make it work, but in the end, she didn't want it to. Her son, my step-son, is the only child I have ever had, and will ever have. Due to a genetic syndrome, I can't have kids. I raised him as my son, he called me daddy. I was going to adopt him, but that costs a lot of money. Now, I have no rights, and will likely never see him again. She thinks it better to "not confuse him" with my presence. I think he has a father who is willing to be there, and he shouldn't be left wondering "where did daddy go?".

    Jon, Texas Submitted Oct 2012
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  • Dear Brianna

    Your poem is lovely and your experience, among those of too many children, is exactly why I became a family mediator. My job is not, sadly, about keeping couples together, but in helping them to manage their separation with the least hostility and destruction. Children have a right to two parents. In my mediation practice I strive to get separating parents to recognize this so that both can stay positively involved in their children's lives. I found your poem when I was looking for something to illuminate a class I'm teaching about family mediation. Would you mind if I used your poem? At some point I'd also like to revamp my website. Would you mind me putting a link to your poem?

    Brianna, it may be that your Dad loves you but doesn't see how to be a part of your life. It may be that he just doesn't care. But you need to know this is not your fault. You are clearly loveable, intelligent and sensitive. Carry on being you!

    Izzy, England Submitted Nov 2012
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  • I'm a mom and my daughter story is so much like your poem. 6 month old she was the day he left and now she 16 years. His dad left him at 3 week and have no idea where he is. We do know were her dad is he is with his mom but for 6 plus year we had no clue where he was. My heart goes out to all. I am a mom and a child from DIVORCED parents. They divorced when I was 10 years I had him but he showed love with money not words or hugs. It's hard and even after 17 years I am still hurt and I am just now letting go and telling him how I felt for so long. Don't hide your feeling away let your mom and dad hear them even if it hurts them. You're better working and healing now not 17 or what ever years later. Good luck to all.

    Tamera Weiss Submitted Dec 2012
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  • I'm a divorced woman and I'm glad I was able to read this poem. Reading all the responses has given me an idea of what my children are feeling. Three years after the divorce it just feels as if it happened yesterday. I lived with this man for 20 years. The reason I didn't divorce before was because I wanted my kids to grow up with their dad....but then I realized that I was harming them even more. Even though we're divorced we still fight and I hate him more than anything for destroying my marriage. After reading this I realize that this is my children's father no matter what and I will do my best to encourage them to have a relationship with their dad...now that the dad is still around.....thank you great post!!,

    J.M.C Submitted 5/18/2013
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  • My dad is having an affair and my mom knows he has been having an affair for 8 years! That's since I was 4!! My dad is also an alcoholic. He stopped drinking when my older sister was born but 5 years later, when I came, he started again. I wish my parents would just get a divorce but my mom says then they would have to sell the house because both of them would want to keep it and that wouldn't be fair. Couldn't they just give it to one of my older siblings, two of them are over 18. I love my dad and I love my mom but I definitely get mad at my mom a lot more than I get mad at my dad. I wish they would get a divorce.

    Paige, California Submitted 8/7/2013
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  • My parents got divorced when I was 4 or 5. I live with my mother, this poem is a mirror of my life, I really don't know if my father knows that I'm alive or not. I really miss him. He was not there when I went to school for the first time . After 1 year later I will be in college. But I still hope that I will see him soon. And he can also wish me on my birthday and I will be able to call someone DAD...

    Oeshorjo Hossain Submitted 1/3/2014
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  • I am a woman who was married for 20 years and during that period experienced cheating and abuse of all forms because I thought at least my children had their father around. He finally left to live with his mistress and doesn't care about the kids. Reading the poem and the comments makes me cry and wonder whether I did the right thing to take care of my kids and give them a better future. I ask myself if it would have been in their best interests to let them go after their father who didn't care than have half-hearted kids who still seek for their father and not appreciate what I have to go through to give them the love and life they have. I wish I could get their honest thinking. In most cases, it is forgotten that women also have a life. Sometimes, I think I made a wrong decision maybe I should just hand them over and have the chapter closed. It really hurts deeply to be undermined by your own blood and flesh.

    Liz, Tunisia Submitted 2/15/2014
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  • Hi there to all, so at first I do want to say I have read all these comments and oh gosh was it ever touching! Little background history about myself: I'm 19 years of age who is similar to all of you who are having parents going through divorce after 25 years of marriage and gosh is it ever hard! Countless number of nights shedding tears, thoughts of suicide but always chickened out, acting out in violent ways. My message to all those who are going through this is we are united as one and we have each other to fall back on. Please for all of you who are thinking of suicide it is not the right answer, please speak to someone your siblings, parents, teachers.

    Dan The Heart To All Submitted 2/24/2014
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  • Been separated for years and am going through a nasty divorce. Raised my son by myself for years and then he went with mom so I could get a handle on some work issues. That's when all hell broke. She started a court case and is driving me out of his life while the courts don't do much if anything at all! I'm pretty much at the point where I'm going to have to walk away from my son to maintain my own sanity. As hard as it may be on me and on him I see no alternative. If I'm in his life she uses him as a blunt instrument. Perhaps if I go at least fighting will cease. Of course she'll bash me with him but she does that now anyway. Catch 22 really sucks! Damned if I stay and damned if I'm absent but at least if I stay out of his life I can have peace of mind. I never had a dad growing up so I've always tried to be there for my kids.

    Bob, Canada Submitted 4/2/2014
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