Puberty Love Poem

Last year I thought that you were icky as I ate my glue,
But this year I can see that I have greatly misjudged you.
Your retainer gleams with moonlight beams when you smile in my direction.
I can see through greasy hair that we have a connection.

My armpit hair is growing just as fast as our romance,
And now that I'm like 5 foot 5 I think I have a chance.
There's something about my love for you that others just don't get.
The things I like about you are as many as my zits.

I've not seen you for a while now and I hope you're doing well,
Because I think my armpits have a very lonely smell.
If I were left without you I would have a heart attack,
So let me serenade you with this song from Nickleback.

You want to play Diablo with me? I hope you won't mind.
I think you would be purple, you're a legendary find.
I want to see your visage more than any other faces,
'Cause like my Warcraft druid, you have charmed me with your graces.

You're beautiful, you're wonderful, you make my heart go boom,
Just like the can of Axe I unleashed upon this room.
I know that you will love me, and I know it will be neat,
Because my shampoo label says, "Rinse, attract, repeat."

Though I may be awkward, this poem may be weird,
And my good side may be tough to see through my patchy beard,
My mind is going crazy, but one thing is true:
My random hormones have paired me with you.