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Abortion Poem

I am a married mother of 3. Together my husband & I made a decision to terminate our pregnancy, the choice we made on that one day, has caused pain & heartache to the two of us and our children for 3 years now, unfortunately in life there are some things you can never change. I just hope I can forgive myself & my story can be a wake up call to someone else.

Remorse Is Forever

© Ebony Angel B.
I can't believe I took your life
I know now and I knew then, I had no right.
It was a selfish choice than I made.
I chose myself when your life, I could have saved.
I thought it would be easier to terminate
But i still feel the remorse 3 years to the date.
You were one of Heavens Angels that GOD lent to me.
And I took your life, could GOD forgive me.
I was lost and confused and didn't know what to do.
So I selfishly chose me, when I should have chose you.
I regret that I will never see your face.
or never comfort you with a motherly embrace.
That decision has put a strain on our marriage.
I believe what we did was the cause of our recent miscarriage.
I hope GOD can forgive us, and that you can do.
To bring you back there is nothing I wouldn't do.
Live on my love I will see you at the gate.
To hold, love and kiss you Mommy just can't wait.
I'm sorry I've stolen an Angel away.
I will feel Remorse FOREVER, because of that day.


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Published: Aug 2008

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  • Definitely made me cry. I will pray for you. Don't know if you've been to the Pro-life Rally in Washington D.C. but I'm sure they'd love to have you and to hear your story.

    Cindy Submitted Sep 2008
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  • yea...I had one too and I absolutely regret it, its been almost 8 months and I still haven't forgiven myself. I wanted to keep it, but my "boyfriend at the time" didn't want it. he had a 2 year old son, and me being me I let him get into my head with all the "I cant have another kid, my family will hate you, and you don't need a kid right now you need to enjoy life" that he said to me, 4 days after I did it, he started talking to his sons mom again. He left me lonely, lost and depressed..duno how I will get over it. I miss my baby everyday...I will never have an abortion again it was the first and last time, and if I could go back I would, I wouldn't care if I had to do everything myself I rather be a single mom then not a mom at all...to a baby I once had....

    lani Submitted Oct 2008
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  • It's hard to believe that it's been 17 years since I made that selfish decision. Your 13 year old sister and 11 year old brother will never know how lucky they would have been to have you as an older sibling. I regret not having you despite the social fall-out that I would have endured. Your life was not meant for me to take. I hope you can forgive me and I can't wait until I can hug you.

    Lisa Submitted Oct 2008
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  • My mother had an abortion before I was born. She told me when I was 18, which means my sibling would've been 3 years older than me. I am 26 now, and there isn't a day that goes by that I don't think of them. This poem was so touching, I am sorry you are going through what you are going through. There isn't a day that goes by my mother doesn't regret what she did, I do too! will be praying for you and your husband

    jacquelyn Submitted Nov 2008
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  • Your story has touched my heart, as all abortion stories so often do. Please remember that God can see deep inside your heart. He knows you regret the decision to abort your baby. He knows you have to live with that decision each and every day! He also wants you to know that He loves you and forgives you! Through this life experience, you have an opportunity to help change the hearts and minds of a nation who is blind and deaf to the pain and suffering caused by abortion. You can make a difference in another young mother and her child's lives. This poem is a huge first step. God bless you.

    Doris Rodriguez Submitted Dec 2008
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  • I'm so sorry I know how you feel I made that same painful decision and to this day I cry and reading your poem I cry I've never hurt so bad in my life and would give anything to take it back I was selfish and I too have other children, but nothing can replace this child and I will truly never forgive myself I talk to her/or him every night when I go to sleep and just say I'm sorry I love you.

    Penelope McKnight Submitted Dec 2008
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  • Although I have never had an abortion your story touched my heart. I wish that everyone who is considering abortion could read your poem as well as many of the others on this site. God bless you and your family.

    Claudia Lee Submitted Sep 2009
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  • Thank you for your lovely poem. God does offer forgiveness when we repent. He will never stop loving you! The Lord has recently moved my heart to start an anti-abortion blog. We need to help save the babies but we also need to love the ladies! We all have sinned and fallen short of the glory of God. Ebony, you are right where you need to be with the Lord. And I have counseled others to know that their aborted little ones will indeed be waiting in heaven with open arms to reunite with their mamas. Just like your little angel. Love, Pastor Melanie

    Melanie Jean Garuffi, Southern NJ Submitted Jan 2010
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  • I really like this poem, and it takes a lot for you to tell your story, GOD doesn't punish people for their mistake instead he takes you and shields you in his arms, continue to pray and you will be blessed..

    Shasheena, Canada Submitted Mar 2010
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  • I wish I could go back. I would be celebrating my babies 1st birthday this month. I think about you every day my little bean, I wish your dad didn't make me believe I had no other choice. I miss you and love you and cannot wait until I can hug and kiss you xo.

    Megan, Ottawa Ontario Canada Submitted Apr 2010
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  • My husband and I have a 18 month old little girl, and I have recently been diagnosed with cervical cancer, so when I got pregnant we made the decision to abort. It was the hardest thing I've ever done, and the biggest regret of my life. Your poem is something I will always consider very personal and will always be my comfort. Thank you. It is amazing.

    C, Las Vegas Submitted May 2010
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  • This poem touched me very much. 20 plus years ago I had an abortion. Today I am doing a post abortion bible study. There is forgiveness and hope. Really the hardest thing is to forgive myself. So sad how many lives are affected by abortion.

    C, Welch Submitted Aug 2010
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  • Thanks so much for sharing these wonderful words with all, I wish with all of my heart and energies that we could pass laws that protect out youngest future citizens, they are our blood and not just a "fetuses" like they say they are. we act only out of fear and emotional ignorance. we will carry this mourning in our hearts.

    Mary, Salt Lake City Submitted Nov 2010
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  • Hearing you story touch me in so many ways I'm 18 and was pregnant and had a miscarriage on 10-27-10 and before that I was really considering an abortion because the father said he couldn't handle a child. The pain of knowing that a part of you will never see or experience what we have or see this day is the worst pain that a woman/mother can experience. Not a day that I don't think or cry that my baby isn't here. I almost feel it's my fault that I had a miscarriage or that god is punishing me for considering the option of abortion. your poem is truly inspiring and you are in my prayers

    Cheyanne W.Harvey, Il Submitted Nov 2010
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  • I had a termination 20 years ago. I was just 17 and on a medication that caused developmental issues with the unborn. I also had no support from family. I felt I HAD to. I have regretted that decision everyday. I have 4 children now but I always think of my oldest baby. He will always have a special place in my heart and I hope that I have the forgiveness that I have asked for all these years. If I could turn back time I would in a heartbeat.

    Jill, San Diego Submitted Jan 2011
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  • This is almost like reading my life, but instead of having a miscarriage, on medical grounds doctors said I had to have another abortion. So I did, only to be told 2 weeks later that they had made a mistake and I could have had the baby. I'll always feel like it was karma, that it was my punishment.
    It never leaves you and I will always blame myself for it.
    Thank you for sharing this poem. It's extremely sad and I'm sorry for your loses. xxxx

    Sarah Submitted Jan 2011
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  • Hello all my name is Ebony Angel Bailey Bryant I am the author of this poem and it brings me great comfort and joy to know that my tragedy could have provided comfort to someone else. I have 3 other kids and a stepdaughter my husband and I are still together but unfortunately I have not been able to forgive either of us. Your comments have all been very comforting to my still aching heart and soul.

    Philadelphia, Pa Submitted Feb 2011
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  • loved your poem. I have had 2 abortions. both very painful to me to this date. I am blessed to have been able to get pregnant again and I have decided to keep this child even if me and the dad don't get along in the end. I already have 2 boys from different relationships and the fear of another child being raised without their dad made me follow through with my decisions but not no more. I have put my fear aside and will raise 3 babies alone if I have to. God knows I didn't want to go through with it and all the tears I cried and the pain I went through. Thanks for a beautiful poem. expressed my feelings perfectly!

    E Medina Submitted Mar 2011
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  • I don't know where to start with my story. I've had 2 abortions from my ex partner I also have 3 beautiful children and they are the only good that came out of that 13 year abusive relationship. I have recently had a baby boy from my new partner who means the world to me and is bringing up my other children as his own. I'm suffering from my actions all those years ago and not a day goes by when I don't regret it..but for some reason I'm dreaming about it. I wish I'd had the strength to save my babies lives and I'm sorry for taking them. I had no right but at the time I thought I was doing the best for them :( I'm in bits xx my heart goes out to all you ladies and our tiny baby angels xx

    Rachel,Uk Submitted Mar 2011
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  • I am so so sorry, a wrong decision, a life of regret and stabbing pain when least expected - its been 20 years and never eases - so sorry my should have been baby, so sorry x

    Gina, Kent Submitted Mar 2011
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  • I just went through this not long ago. I still can't stop crying. It hurts so much. I wish I wasn't so stupid and chose to not be so selfish. Not a day goes by when I don't think of my unborn child. I have so much love for him/her even though he/she will never get to know :'(

    Tahlia, Brisbane Submitted Jul 2011
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  • A child is a gift from God, but with certain circumstances in a person's life, we do what we think is best at that moment with the pressure and depression. God sees the heart of a person. Life is always not about wants. God is a loving Father who understands you, accepts you and loves you just the way you are. You cannot change the past, sorrow no more! He has already forgiven you. Just commit the matter into God's hands, press forward and count your blessings :)

    Ann, Sri Lanka Submitted Nov 2011
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  • So sad to say this is my biggest regret in life I was young and I know that no excuse I always wonder what could have been. I had so much family support but I still made this terrible choice I hope and pray for forgiveness from god and my little angel.....

    Melissa Submitted Jun 2012
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  • It's been 28 years for me and rarely a day goes by that I do not think about, and regret my decision to have an abortion. I never got pregnant again, although not much later in life, I desperately wanted to, even trying in-vitro fertilization, to no avail. I tried for 20 years to have a baby. Then I got cancer and had to have a hysterectomy. No baby for me. Ever again. Worst decision I ever made in my life. I'll go to my own grave begging my unborn child, and God, for forgiveness.
    I'm forever sorry, baby.
    Your poem is beautiful.
    Thank you for sharing.

    Traci Submitted Jul 2012
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  • I went to college. Had sex with this boy whom I barely knew. Needless to say that one encounter was all it took for me to get pregnant. I tried talking that morning after pill several days later. Days dragged on like months and everyday I wondered am I pregnant while waiting for signs of my menstrual cycle. My breast began to feel tender like never before and of course I though it was because my period would soon start. Days go by and no sign of my period. Labor day I decided to go get a pregnancy test come back home and take it. Of course it read positive. Really scared I immediately told my mother hoping to get some comfort. She was more so disappointed than anything. She took me to get two test and they both read positive. To make an even longer story short. My baby's father was not cooperating he had somehow made his mind think that he wasn't my baby's father and I was only trying to set him up. I felt like me having my baby would bring shame to all my love ones. I felt like I had no one and one wanted me to have my baby. So made the decision to abort. I carried my child for 10 weeks before I had an abortion. And almost half of those ten weeks consisted of severe morning sickness. Which kind of made me want to abort. I went through with the abortion. And I at first felt really relieved. But that quickly wore off. I began to really regret my decision. I just want my baby back and I felt that I was selfish and unfair to a life that God had blessed me with. 8 months after the procedure I still haven't coped with it. I think that by now my baby would be at least two to three months old. One day I hope I finally forgive myself. Until then I will continue to pray that God and my precious little baby forgives me.

    Kaylausa Submitted Jul 2012
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  • I am 6 weeks along and the father wants me to get an abortion that's all he really says. I have been thinking of keeping the baby after all these stories I know it will be hard either path I choose. I know it is not a good time and we don't have the money for it but I just don't know if I could live with myself if I do have the abortion. Me and the father aren't together anymore he says will get through it but I an very scared of what to do.

    Bonnie, Mesa Az Submitted Oct 2012
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  • I had an abortion when I was 17. It was a one night stand and when I confronted the father he denied all knowledge. My mother took me to have it. Wasn't really any other option.
    I have always been a partier since then and a little off the rails but when I was 26 I met a great guy and fell pregnant. We were over the moon. The pregnancy was ectopic and resulted in the loss off the baby and of one of my fallopian tubes. I was told that the chances of becoming pregnant were very slim and of carrying to full term was even less. Naturally I was upset and blamed myself. My relationship ended and I took off overseas. So this brings me here. I am 29 and 11 weeks pregnant but I am single and so scared. I want this baby but I am scared that I want it for the wrong reasons. My life has changed and I have made so many plans that don't include being a mother because I didn't think it was a possibility.
    Look but if I don't have this baby I will hate myself.

    Jana, Ireland Submitted Oct 2012
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  • Bonnie from Mesa, I am praying for you! I was told once, that if you make a decision from selfless love, that you've made the right choice. Never make a decision from fear, you are no doubt stronger than you think. I am praying for strength, wisdom, and peace for you. With love.

    Brandy, New Boston, Illinois Submitted Oct 2012
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  • I know it wasn't something that I was suppose to do but I was scared and so confused. I didn't know who to talk to about it and the guy that got me pregnant was really mean to me when I told him I was pregnant. He told me things that really hurt me!!!! Idk why I did it! I don't know what was I thinking! I just hope my baby forgives me one day...
    A few days after I had the abortion I had a dream that it was a beautifully baby girl. She was beautiful!! I wish I could go back and have my baby in my arms because it's really hard for me to know that I took her life away when I didn't have the right to do something like that!! I think of my baby every day and I every night that I look at the stars at night I know that one of those stars is my beautiful baby girl!! God please forgive me!!

    Arizona Submitted Nov 2012
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  • 4 days ago I made the decision to abort. I am a single mom of 3 already. The pain and the tears will never stop. I made a very selfish decision that will live with me for the rest of my life. I will always wonder what if. I will always wonder what the baby would look like, whose eyes would he/she have. I regret my decision fully but somehow have to come at peace with the decision. It's killing me slowly, every minute, every hour of every day.

    Denise S Submitted May 2013
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  • I am 17 and just had a medical abortion, I have been with my boyfriend now for over a year and accidentally got pregnant. I was 8 weeks and 4 days pregnant when I made the decision to have an abortion and I regret it so much now! I'm not the type to usually post on blogs but I feel that people need to know what you can feel like after. I feel selfish and stupid I thought I was too young to have a child and it wasn't the right time and I wouldn't be able to afford it and it would ruin mine and my boyfriends future and he agreed. The day I had the abortion I went to change my pad I saw my tiny baby lying there . It had fingers and toes its not just a fetus it's a life that we created and selfishly ended! Now I feel like a murderer and wish I could go back in time and keep the child instead. If people know they aren't ready for a child they should use protection not just the pill ( that's what I was on when I got pregnant) but condoms also then you may not make the wrong choice like I did.

    Kelly Ann, England Submitted May 2013
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  • It's been 2 years now and not a day goes by that I don't regret it. I am married and already had a 3 year old son, but when I told my husband I was pregnant again he said no no no. He said we must take care of it quickly. He said we could not afford another baby. He said he just wanted one child. He went with me to the abortion clinic, to be "supportive". That was two years ago. We have not had sex since. We sleep in different rooms. I'm mortified of getting pregnant and having to murder another baby. My marriage is sick. What we did was so selfish. When you're pregnant you don't ask where will the money come from, how will I take care of it, you just trust in God, like the millions of woman who have been scared bearing children before you. What, did I think I was the only woman in history who was pregnant and scared? If I could go back in time I would. My son still asks me sometimes if I'm going to have a baby so he can have a little brother or sister.

    Keli, Texas Submitted 8/9/2013
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  • I was 21 when I had my abortion. I was so scared to tell my mother fearing she would throw me out of the house. Like a coward, I took the easy way out, but I have regretted this for more than 40 years. I think about my baby everyday. I think about how he/she may have looked. I'll always carry my guilt. I hope God can forgive me because I can't forgive myself. The father was never able to have children in previous marriage so he could not believe it was his. He was the only man in my life at that time. But I was a coward. I hope my baby forgives me and I truly hope he/she is waiting for me in heaven.

    Mary, Texas Submitted 8/28/2013
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  • Hello my name is Stephanie. I'm 23 years old. I had an abortion April 23 2013. Me and my man friend had only known each other for about 4 months. I was at work and felt really sick so I went to the emergency room and I found out that I was pregnant. So I called him and told him to come up to the hospital. when he got there I told him I was pregnant and he came to the back with me. I was very hormonal I had to get an I.V. because I was very dehydrated and the first thing he said to me was you're having an abortion but he didn't say it just like that he cussed at me and told me that he didn't want to have a baby by me because we didn't know each other for long and because we was not financially stable. But yet me and him had jobs. A week after I had the abortion I started drinking really bad and I got a DUI. I spent three and a half months in jail away from my other two daughters. I definitely felt like God punish me and that was my punishment. I just got out of jail December 12th 2013 and 3 days ago I just found out that I'm pregnant again from the same man. He told me that he wanted me to have another abortion but yet he is sad about it. I'm not having another abortion if you don't want to be there I'll take care of my 3 by myself and God will help me. I think about my daughter or son everyday and heaven and I tell him or her that I love her or him very much and I'm sorry and I hope that you can forgive me.

    Fayetteville Submitted 1/15/2014
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  • I had an abortion last July 2013. I am supposed to give birth this month, March 2014. Lately I have been getting dreams of children and at the end of the dream, this one very pretty little girl stands up and stares at me. It is freaky actually even if she was very pretty. I did not think about the abortion for so many months but this month it is like a total meltdown. I am moody, irritated and very extremely remorseful. My mother is now head of an adopting agency and is adopting a foster child living with us for three years. I cannot reconcile the fact that she ordered me to have the abortion yet she will head an adoption agency and is so proud of the little boy she will be adopting. People have noticed I am cold to the child. Of course I can't tell them my secret. It is eating me up. Guilt, shame...I wish God will forgive me one day. Please, no matter how old you are, do not get an abortion.

    Mel, Philippines Submitted 3/12/2014
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  • I had a son, then accidentally got pregnant shortly thereafter. It was carelessness on my part and I regret it every day. But I've had 3 altogether. Carelessness mixed with wanting another child but then the older man I'm with using the guilt factors and financial factors, getting inside my insecure head. I will regret my actions for the rest of my life. I feel like Karma has a hit put out on me anytime anything good ever happens. Reading your poem has reminded me of how stupid and unforgiveable my actions were. I had the ability to love those babies, and I have so much deep guilt. And today I found out my brother and sister-in-law lost their little boy, she was 5 months along, delivered and held that sweet little boy. My heart is broken as it should be. I hate myself.

    Michelle, Nl Submitted 4/22/2014
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  • Hey everyone...I cannot say that I feel the pain all you woman are going through. I'm married and pregnant with my 2nd baby...so excited and can't wait. I haven't had an abortion...or a miscarriage, but this poem touches me deep down to the core. Made me cry too just thinking about other moms that had to make this decision. It's so easy for the man to say get an abortion and terminate...at the end the woman is always left with the deep wounds. My friend was 6 months pregnant and she and her boyfriend went for a scan to see if it's a baby boy/girl...only to be told by the doctors that the baby has been dead in her for 2 days. She still had to carry her dead baby in her stomach for a few more days, she then gave birth to a beautiful baby girl, with no life. Hearing her pain was heartbreaking for me too. I know I don't really have the experience you guys have but I read to understand sometimes you don't really have to go through it to feel the pain they do, seeing it is enough to break once heart. Maybe not to the extent as the person suffering…

    Cape Town Submitted 4/22/2014
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  • I'm 43, thought I was done having kids, but did not use protection. I found out I was pregnant , so scared, ashamed because I'm not married and didn't want to face anyone. So I got the abortion, part of me wanted it, part of me didn't. I hate myself, I could have kept my baby. I was desperate and didn't think of anyone but myself. I want my baby back, I can't stop crying, I hurt all over. I feel like dying everyday. Thanks for posting, it helps that someone out there knows how I feel.

    Samantha, Florida Submitted 5/13/2014
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