STOP Teen Suicide Poem

This actually didn't happen to me or anyone I know, but it's a poem about what could happen when trying to commit suicide, I know that's sometimes it's hard to deal with things and that suicide may only be the answer because I have been there. I almost died when I took all those pills, I was actually raped by my brother at my old elementary school one night. I hope this poem helps someone out there...

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This poem reminds me when I started having my own depression problems. All I could think about is are the people that call my name and smile when they see me going to miss me when I leave.. then …

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© Amanda more by Amanda

Published: Jul 2011

Why Did I Do It?

POP!
the bottle is opened,
spilling the liquor.
GULP!
I take a huge sip of it,
trying to subdue my pain...

I open another bottle,
this one has a white lid an orange container.
I pour its contents out onto my bed.

I just stare at them for what seemed like hours,
I pick the first one up and put it to my lips,
I say a silent prayer and insert it into my mouth,
then I put another in,
then another then another, until I can't put any more in my mouth,
I gulp it all down using the liquor to wash it down.

I go and stand inside my window for my last look of sunlight,
I see a little girl standing, staring in at me,
she is wearing an old faded blue dress,
she's holding a stuffed rabbit that has patches everywhere,
then I notice that she's me,
that's me when I was a little girl...

I cry even harder
as things start getting blurry,
I gasp for air between sobs
as I get dizzy,
then it goes black.

I see me,
it's my 8th birthday,
daddy isn't there,
a car pulls up...
daddy is dead.

I fall asleep that night,
I wake up to this noise inside my bedroom,
I feel something moving my night gown up,
I try to scream but can't.
then it goes black again...

I'm transported to a magical place,
I see all kinds of colors,
I even see daddy!
wait... who's that?
is that me when I was 8?

I try to call out to my dad and me but no noise comes out,
then just like that they are gone.

I wake up lying in a hospital bed,
the bright lights blinding me,
a tube hanging out of my mouth,
what happened I try and ask,
but nothing comes out.

a nurse walks in,
and tells me I've become mute,
and I'm paralyzed from the waist down,
because I passed out and fell...

all I could think of was this:
WHY DID I DO IT?

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Has this poem touched you? Share Your Story
  • by Taylor, Mesa Az
  • Mar 2012

This poem reminds me when I started having my own depression problems. All I could think about is are the people that call my name and smile when they see me going to miss me when I leave.. then someone found my note that I was in a dark place and they sent me to the hospital.. I was here for a week and even now sometimes I read these poems and think that isn't the way to go although I am in such a dark place.

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