Abuse Poems - Page 3

I've spent many years now
Running from the bear.
Just when I think you're gone,
You once again are there.

Fear grips like a vise
If you're anywhere around.
I stay quiet and hidden
So that I will not be found.

Overwhelmed by sheer terror
Of another vicious attack,
Praying you won't find me,
But you always circle back.

Adrenaline is now surging,
Giving me the strength to flee.
I run until I can run no more,
And then you catch up to me.

Suddenly you're upon me.
I see the rage in your eyes.
I try so hard to fight you off.
I hear your roar above my cries.

You could do more than frighten me,
For of your strength I am aware,
But you let me go once again
So I can start running from the bear.

I never knew you,
we never spoke,
but you thought you could take
what was never yours...

Your eyes, your breath
I still feel on my skin,
your ruthless power
still kills me within...

What made you do it
I will never know
but I refuse to be a prisoner
within my own soul...

My heart still bleeds,
my soul stone cold...
if only I could take back
what you stole.

I never knew you,
we never spoke,
but forever you will have
something that was never yours.

I try to rationalize
it all
as you
tear
right through me.

The monster's back tonight.

Fueled by alcohol
and past conversation,
by rage and
imagination,
you've become a beast
I hardly know
yet know too well.

I can't build walls fast enough
for you.

All these years have taught you well.

The assault
begins,
you're armed
with the thoughts
inside your head,
barbed words and
insinuations.

You leave wounds
no one sees
but me.

The monster's back tonight.

I can't build walls fast enough.

I try to rationalize it
all.

Yesterday might've gone down in flame
But I remember the nights spent alone
I remember your shame I called my own
I remember you and your twisted games

Yesterday might've gone down in flame
But I remember the days full of pain
I remember the scars and the pouring rain
I remember you and your twisted games

Yesterday might've gone down in flame
But I remember the storm and hurricane
I remember the clouds above my head
I remember the days I used to dread

I saw a monster, I promise he was real,
A presence haunting with a touch you could feel.
His footsteps echoed like a beast's heavy tread,
A roar of laughter that filled me with dread.

No piercing yellow eyes, no razor-sharp teeth,
Yet cruelty manifested a silent, sinister beneath.
He wore no fangs, no claws on display.
Yet his actions are a predator's in a more subtle way.

A living nightmare, not confined to tales.
With a grasping hand as sharp as nails.
A figure once gentle, now an expression of rage,
Creating havoc on his abusive rampage.

His words and actions poison the air,
Memories and stories impossible to bear.
His voice like thunder, sharp and cruel,
A monster's tongue is a venomous tool.

A creature unseen, a master of disguise,
My father, a monster with familial ties.
He created nightmares, chased away dreams, 
A horrific man with a monstrous scheme.

his belt hung on the wall, 
in the backroom where he victimized me;
as mom tried to stop it
the door slammed shut, click,
the feeling of leather against my skin,
cold sweats running through me
you could hear my cries,
begging him to stop,
like dogs screaming. 

he says he loves me,
but does he? 

his behavior was ugly,
picking me up by my arms,
pinning me against the wall,
in my face,
shouting ugly things. 

hiding in the bedroom corner while weeping in pain?
begging a higher power to make it all go away,
Why me? "I asked"
trying to imagine it all away,
the fighting, the phone calls, 
911
the knock at the door,
the young man in uniform, slender and tall.
the badge on his shirt,
two children clinging to their mom's leg,
not saying a word,
while imagining being saved,
does one deserve to shake?
shake like a creaking broken fence in the wind!