Abuse Poem

I was sexually abused by my dad, the earliest I can remember is when I was twelve...my mind has completely drawn a blank ..I can remember nothing before I was 12...I don't know if something bad happened and I made myself forget...I guess I will never know...I thought about being hypnotized but my man tells me I may be better off not knowing......I have quite a few poems on this subject...most of my poetry is about my life...thanks for reading

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Thanks for sharing your story! I'm praying that God will show you comfort and love in your life, and forgiveness and peace for all the things that happened to you. God bless.

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My Innocence, Never To Regain

©

Published: May 2011

If God granted me one wish
I know what it would be.
To return the child's innocence
That you stole from me.
You said it was all right
All Daddy's play this game.
I felt  that it was wrong
And thought I was to blame.

Daddy can't you see
The shame you gave to me.
There's so much guilt inside my soul
I never will be free.
I used to think that God was blind
For me, he had no love.
I was told  that he was watching,
All of us from above.

If so, why did he let it happen?
Why bestow me so much pain?
My soul, my being, shattered
My innocence, never to regain.
Daddy, you took away my innocence
I've loved and hated you for years,
As I sit here writing
I'm holding back the tears.

The Bible says to Honor thy Father
But, I doubt he meant this way.
I'm gaining back my self respect
I pray for it everyday.
I'm older now and found my faith
There's only one to blame.
I know now that God loves me
He loves us all the same.



Copyright © Ellen Rector 2003

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Has this poem touched you? Share your story!
  • Lacie Camacho by Lacie Camacho, California
  • 5 years ago

I was so touched with this poem as I have felt like a mirror to the words of this poem with the abuse I incurred and the guilt and shame I felt and the questioning of God and if God existed and would let me be so hurt like that if he DID exist. I thought that I was Gods personal joke put here on earth only for times he was bored and decided to toss more terrible and horrific things my way to see what happened. After many many years I am just starting to learn the real me and who I am and regain confidence and self respect/esteem. I am 34 years old and for the first time in my life I am falling in love and he is tearing down walls and it scares me to death but I see now I am not alone. I'm not a freak. I AM LOVEABLE!!! Your poem here was so uplifting to see I'm NOT alone and I CAN succeed in life and love. Thank You!!!

  • Tric J by Tric J
  • 1 year ago

Thanks for sharing your story! I'm praying that God will show you comfort and love in your life, and forgiveness and peace for all the things that happened to you. God bless.

  • Ellen by Ellen Poet
  • 8 years ago

I AM SO HONORED TO HAVE THIS POEM PUBLISHED...THANKS

ELLEN

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