STOP Suicide Poems - Page 3

Just a girl
In this world while it twirls when it whirls
her head in a haze
can't seem to find away out
If she screams no matter what she shouts
Not a soul hears her cry
There's nothing but dark skies
She's consumed by her morbid thoughts
Everything around, the pain has brought
Her slit wrists
Her bloody grip
She raised her arm once more
on the bathroom floor
the blood reaches her neck life flows out
still not a soul listens for her shout
she's left she's flown
to a happier place
where even her scars are no disgrace
that girl now has a smile on her face

Silence
Only tears
As I press the blade
Against my pale skin

Red
The blood flows
From the wounds
Echoing my inner pain

Satisfaction
As I feel the knife
Slicing into me
I only deserve pain

Anguish
As I realize what I've done
I feel accomplishment
As I gaze at the marks upon my skin

Stares
People are horrified
Don't understand why
Neither do I

It started out quiet
Like a dull hum
Then grew like cancer
Till my body was numb
The shock
The hurt
The tears
And the pain
All to form something I could not sustain
A part of my heart broke
My eyes bled the tears
I cried out the memories of many, many years
They started out quiet
Then struck me like lightening
Attacking my soul more than ever so slightly
My face forms a mask
Shields this demon inside
A demon of guilt, anger, sadness
All in one night
It started out quiet
Then part of me died.

Fifteen stitches on my left arm
Had nothing to do with the pain in my heart.
Broken glass was what did the harm,
Not the thoughts in my head or the hand that I love.

Behind the bandage were the secrets I kept
With no one to blame but two troubled heads.
You never saw all the clues that I left,
Not even the letter that said where I went.

I could have posted it up on a billboard or wall
But you would have looked past it with no clue at all.
I kept it inside for a really long time
With nothing to show but the tears that I cried.

You're perfect! You told me you do nothing wrong
And that's what I thought when I did what I've done.
Again the tears fell from the eyes of a child
Who never felt loved, not even a while.

A's and A's were my grades in school.
With that, I thought that I had you fooled,
But as soon as a B or C would show up
Your word would bring back the blood from my arm.

We're your parents! You told me we know what's best for you now!
So how come you locked me in this hell house
I tried to escape, I tried to just leave
But no one would give me a sharp knife or key

Only the dead can come back to life
But why does the living feel so dead inside
I repeated that over and over again
But that wouldn't change the thoughts in my head

I'm not perfect! I said I do everything wrong!
And that's what I said when you knew what I've done
Dripping down was the blood of a child
Who never felt loved, not even a while

As I fell on the floor I heard a soft voice
Who said you're okay, who said you're with god
I don't want to be! I yelled I don't want to be here!
I just wanted parents who would love me to tears!

In a hospital bed I woke up the next day
In a room full of candies, flowers and heads
Kisses and hugs were all thrown my way
Gross comments and yelling were all miles away

I lifted my head as I turned to the door
Two people stepped in that I've never see before
Half smiles on their faces and flowers galore
They gave one k

Four years have passed and still I have to ask myself, why, what if, and if only.
Why did you choose that day to die?
What if I had been there for you?
And if only I had gotten there sooner.
I know how much you hurt inside,
How scared and lonely you must have felt,
But why that day, why not wait things might have changed, things might have gotten better,
What if I had said something different to you, done something different, been someone different,
If only I had been a better daughter, cared for you more, done more.
Was it my fault that you made that choice, that you chose to leave that you left no note,
Did you know what you were doing, did you know that you were leaving me that morning when I kissed you good-bye before work,
I want to know that you don't hurt any more, that you're happy and that your pain has gone away,
I want to know that you don't regret it, that it was the right thing, the right day, the right way,
I want to know that you love me Mum, the way that I love you.
I miss you Mum, today and every day.
We all do.

So lost, just as you were.
As I made my way into the crowd.
Black surrounds me...
So do the many tearful eyes of my friends.
My eyes are red and swollen as well,
I had cried myself to sleep last night.
I remember three days ago,
You had looked me straight in the eye,
moved closer, and wrapped your arms around me.
"what's wrong?"
"nothing"
in reality, everything was wrong...
But I am here now,
placing my sight my best friend.
Now lying still in the soft lining,
Of his casket.
Tears flood my puffy eyes,
they sting...
reminding me that this is real.
That I can never forget my best friend.
R.I.P. Justice Goodwin </3

To my (old) friends: AH, RW, KF

You were all part of my life,
In the beginning you were always there helping me along, inch by inch.
But that thread we had has finally snapped.
I could have ignored you without a second thought, no worries, not a flinch.

But, I played along.
I sang my own desperate song of how one day you would understand.
But you never did.
Never tried to comfort me or hold my hand.
You all ignored it even though deep inside, you know I WAS NOT MYSELF
I no longer laughed,
But replaced that smile with a disturbed frown.
I no longer had fun with you,
This replaced by the constant though of how to drown.

And yet, you were not there.
It was like you didn't even notice,
Like I was no longer important,
YOU JUST DIDN'T CARE!
And STILL, you did not acknowledge me, and this I could see.
You were unaware of the problems that slowly, one by one, took my life from me.

I have no life now,
I hope you are aware of THIS.
You will never have to worry
And I send you this one last goodbye, this one last kiss.
For I have melted away now; dissolved.
And STILL, me, you DO NOT MISS.

The girl who seemed unbreakable finally broke.
The girl who seemed so strong finally fell and crumbled.
The girl who always laughed finally cried
and the girl who never stopped trying... finally gave up...

December 21, 2011 R.I.P Sarah ɛ

Was on this day that your were born
A ray of sunshine that I adorned
From heaven above you were sent to us
Hand crafted and unique, one of a kind you were made

With big brown eyes and a gorgeous smile
Why couldn't you stay longer than a while
An aura you had that shown like a star
I search and look in the night sky you are

As quickly as you arrived
You had suddenly departed
Not right, not fair
For your life had only just started

So today a wish I make for you
One of love and happiness
Happy birthday to my girl so true
You'll always be in my heart and soul

Beautiful as a butterfly
Your spirit set free
Wishing I could be near you
To hold you close to me

Happy birthday my sweetheart
Forever loved

Winter is here, the air is cold, the snow is deep.

His favorite time of year, he loved the outdoors and the
challenges of the hunt, the fish, the race.

We planned together, worked together to prepare, and then raced
together as only a son and father can.

We shared our victories and defeats as only two best friends can.

The pictures of Christmas past are only images on a glossy
piece of paper.

They are no longer memories to relive and share together.

There are no more races to be won or lost.

There are no more stories of the hunt or the fish.

There are only memories of what was and the realization
of what there will not be.

I had to cry tonight.