Poems by Shahinaz Soliman

It is not a man or a woman
It is not even a human
It is what you chose for your life
It is why you left your son and your wife
It is the man made evil
It is what blinds most people

Money was your choice
Money was your loudest voice
Money was your brain wash
Money was your one approach
Money was your master
Money was your life disaster

One day you had a heart
money and greed tore it apart
One day you had a life
It is gone, no family and no wife
One day we made a promise, Greed stepped on it, so it vanished

Now you are standing behind bars
A memory of being happy with coins in the jars
Memories of the dark transformations
Memories when you lost your faith and sensations

Sorry that this was our fate
Sorry that you didn't have a strong gate
Sorry that this is the end
Sorry I can't pretend
Sorry you had a will and you had a choice
Sorry that's insane, you  didn't hear your Lord's voice.
Sorry I lost you, sorry for what you are going through..
Sorry that you did what you do
After all,
we will always love you.

Praying for you

I'm a mess, I guess,

Wanted it all, but settled for less.
A soul adrift, in a pretty dress,

Or a jumbled brain, unable to address

I am a looney tooney in my own way
It's time to work but I chose to play
I can't decide what I will relay
My wisdom or craziness, who to obey?

I am a haha lala dada weeee
I can't make a sentence or even agree
I like it when my brain is locked
When those crazy sounds are totally blocked
When I only listen to a  none-sense thought
It can be boredom or something I caught

Okey dokey the day is over
Tomorrow I will wear this pants and pullover
Lovely or ugly way to go
Wake me up when this whistle blow.

Good night.

The child within me,
A soul you cannot see,
Simplicity and innocence, as pure as it can be,
Purity, laughter, wings that set me free,

It's that child within me.
When I lower my shield,
My thoughts take me to an epic, green field,
I'll run and embrace the flowers,
I can linger there for endless hours.

My arms are wide open to help the world,
No one needs to ask or say a word,
I'll extend my hand to a poor little boy,
To make him happy, I'll give him my toy.

It's that child within me,
Who wants to laugh, play, and jump all day,
To cast away these world impurities without delay.

I didn't ask to grow,
I want my eyes to continue to glow,
My hair to flutter, move, and flow,
My true feelings to be clear and show,

It's the child within me,
That I want you to see,
Just clear, no fear,
That's who I am,
That child is me.

My dad, I miss you every day
My greatest love, my hero
My best memories in every way

The greatest man I knew
In every moment of my life I do remember you
I remember your strong yet tender features
I remember you as a role model and a great teacher
I remember looking up to you, jumping, hopping, and feeling safe

I always hid behind your existence
You taught me about patience and persistence
I felt safe, secure, and never worried when you were around
I always knew with you I was standing on a solid, safe ground

I remember your tear when I read for you my first poem
I remember when you waited for me after my late classes till I came home
I remember your daily hard work, dedication, and tender care
I remember all the love, fun, and thoughts that we used to share

I wanted you to be proud of me
I wanted to be the daughter that you wanted to see
I made sure everything I did was what you would approve
I am purely your daughter, there is nothing more to prove

My children hear about you every day
They always ask me why grandpa didn't stay
I tell them he is in heaven now, looking and praying for us somehow
I love you so much, my dad, your memory will always be alive
I love you so much, my dad, your words and wisdom will always survive

I am a woman,
My strength comes from above,
My emotions, moods, and love,
I am the mother, daughter, and wife,
I am the woman who fought for her life.

I am a woman,
Cancer, I don't care,
I will fight this, and I will dare.
Those breasts fed my baby,
Without them, I will still be the same lady.

I am a woman,
A fighter until the end,
Complex emotions that blossom and blend,
A survivor who will hold your hand.
We will cross that bridge and firmly land.

I am a woman,
Don't listen, they are all wrong,
I'll stay courageous and strong.
No, I'm not leaving now,
Baby, mommy will stay here somehow.

I am your mother,
The woman who nurtured you,
This challenge is easy, it's true,
You don't know what I've been through,

So please don't worry, and don't even feel sorry,
I will fight this till the end, to that cancer, I will never bend.

By Shahinaz Soliman

Broken
To give and not receive
To intimidate when you achieve
When your love falls on a cold ice
Or your dedication sells for a low price
When you hug and it is just a wall
When you cry and no one to call

Broken
When you don't care how I feel
And my broken heart is not the deal
When I see the leaves with no colors
My once fruitful garden has no flowers

Broken
When you are in your own world
When I scream for you and hear no word
When I walk alone on my way
When you have no answers and nothing to say

Broken
looking for my strength
Resting here on this bench
I will shout and shout
then I will figure it out
How to add colors again to the leaves
To encourage my heart and my strong beliefs
My flower's colors will revive
My broken heart will survive
I will never sing again choking, that my heart is still Broken
Never again broken.

Trapped in my thoughts,
In my days and what my life brought.
Trapped in my memories, lost in my reveries.

The scenes of chasing butterflies, laughter and peace .
The thoughts of life waves, hits that dropped me down to my knees.
The happy ways, charms and lucky days.
The grief, the losses and the foul plays.
Life and its waves,
To be strong- to be brave .

Face it- it's something we have to do
Chase it - it is not just me and you
This is life, we just need to accept and survive.
Sharp as a knife but sweet to enjoy as long we are alive.
Trapped I need to set myself free
Trapped I need to get out and see.

I need to open my eyes
Enjoy again the blue skies
Laugh again from my heart
Push myself to a new start
I am free from my thoughts today
Free to love, laugh, live and play.
I am free Today..

Free spirit on a top of a tree,
Watching you humans from the land to the sea.
Remembering life and what it used to be
I  am relieved, my soul is resting,I am all set free.

I see some of you are running like crazy
You there decided to layback  and just be lazy?
Here she is so romantic loving roses and daisy
You there; your life has been unclear frankly so hazy

Angry? just take a deep breath
Scared? don't be afraid of death
Hopeful? For health or for wealth
Lonely? Embrace your life and redo the math

Power and delusions
Money and confusions
Love and relations
Morals and temptations

Judging and arguments
Vitamins and supplements
Winning and losing
Trying and choosing

Behavior and rules
Computers and tools
Punishments and retaliations
Feelings and sensations 

Failure and success
Suits and a dress
Right and wrong
Weak or strong

Happy or sad
Good or bad
Smart or dumb
Sensitive or numb

Peace and war
Little or more
Rich and poor
This is life for sure !!

Ha, I am glad I am free
I don't need to think what it should be
Too much to handle
I am  done, I blew my candle
Here again on the top of a tree
The breeze  is so fresh I am all set free