Wow I'm guessing your around 15 now. I hope you didn't give up on life when you have so much of it to live. I'm 22 and I've had a lot of hardships to overcome myself. I lost grandfather at 13, …
Published: Oct 2012
Breaking Down, Giving In, Giving Up
To not cut, to not be weak, to not fall into temptations.
You single handily abolished whatever pieces of my heart was left.
You see the struggles I've been through. You still leave me, like I'm nothing.
I'm sorry for being weak. I'm sorry for existing. I'm sorry for loving you. I'm sorry for you having to love me. I'm sorry about the struggles I put you through. But I'm most sorry for, is wasting your time.
I'm sorry I apologize too much.
I'm sorry that I can't live up to expectations.
I'm sorry I broke down.
I tried to hold out, to be strong. I physically and mentally can't.
I'm sorry I can't be the ideal perfect girl, everybody makes me out to seem.
I'm sorry you can see scars. But that's the only thing beautiful about me.
I've lost total control. Don't know where or how to start.
Don't know if I want to start. Maybe I should just give up
I cry too much. Too many tears in only a short time.
I'm sorry I couldn't put my fake smile on. I'm sorry I can't find it anymore.
However, what I'm sorry for the most, I'm sorry for affecting you. Everyone. I'm sorry for getting in your heart and in your head.
And once again, I'm sorry for apologizing so much.
Some will say that suicide or cutting is selfish. Selfish for the loved ones.
Isn't it selfish for the loved ones to continue to let the person continuing through life in so much pain?
I'm not committing suicide, but I just might. Too many thoughts, too many unseen cuts the human eye.
That's why I'm breaking down, giving in, and giving up.