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I grew up in a whole family of alcoholics and addicts. It just wasn’t Christmas till Aunt Susan fell down drunk. My mother was the ONLY person in my family to escape her addiction. She made it through after a few relapses. Now I watch helplessly, not knowing what to do as my best friend since the 6th grade falls into the pit of addiction. She can’t even see it as a problem. I am stuck at a fork in the road, leave my friend to her own peril or make her hate me by trying to force her sober. I know you can’t make someone get sober if they don’t want to; I’ve been going to AA meetings with my mom since I was 5 but you still always feel like you can save someone. This poem isn’t great but is how I feel. Enjoy and thank you. (There is inappropriate language for all who are easily offended)

My Friend Is Sinking.

©  Danielle Lollis
Sitting here unaccompanied, concerned and not knowing what to do.
Should I attempt to save you, what have I got to prove?
I’ve already waded my way through a life packed with addicts.
Can I live through one more? Through all the pain you inflict?
Lives have been lost. People I loved, trusted, and admired.
All lost in addictions, what all has transpired?
You forget your friends, and family that care.
All you care about is drinking and dancing while flipping you hair.
When you see video of you drunk you think it's funny and laugh with glee.
All the while the rest of us are hoping you can just f***ing see!
See how you are, the way you act!
You act like a moron and physically attack.
How can you continue when you almost lost me as a friend?
I guess 10 years mean nothing when you get to the bottles end.
Why do what you’ve said you would? Acid is so much more fun!
I can’t go on watching you drown, maybe the addictions already won.
What should I do? Should I cut my losses? Just walk away?
If I asked you to stop to save our friendship what would you say?
Would you tell me it’s you life and to go to hell?
Would you see you need help or just f***ing bail?
I’m at my wits end; I can’t even answer your call.
The drugs and bottle have got you enthrall.
What do I do, dear God what can I do?
When you see a friend drowning and are unable to rescue.
My Friend Is Sinking. by Danielle Lollis @FamilyFriendPoems

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Published: 10/27/2008

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