My First Child

• by Tracy Norah
• 10 years ago

Well ladies I am so sorry for every ones loss. 16 January 2014 is the day that will never get away from my head. Gave birth to a beautiful baby boy and he only lived for 2 hours i miss him so much there's no day that goes without thinking about ma angel. Love you angel Jibril.

• by Danilova K
• 10 years ago

I lost my first baby boy five days ago. It hurt so bad my first pregnancy ever I was 27 weeks no blood flow and heartbeat stop and my dumb doctor wanted ME to go to the emergency room for blood work but it's a lab right across my high risk room I was in and rejected me of an ultra sound I'm so freaking angry and I really can't stop crying or thinking about it. It hurt so bad rest in heaven E D D March 11th 2014

• by Megan, NY
• 10 years ago

Hi, it's nice to read all of your stories well not nice but comforting to be able to have people to relate to. On November 4th 2013 I lost my little boy. He was my first and only child and I was absolutely devastated. I still am. I had to deliver him the next day and he was born at 1:33pm weighting 2lbs 13oz and 15 inches long. I was 31 weeks. I'm also afraid to be pregnant again. I remember how excited I was the whole pregnancy. It's crazy how one moment can change your whole view on something like pregnancy. I hope to one day have the family I want so bad.

• by Tiffany
• 10 years ago

I just lost my baby girl 2 Weeks ago. She was always very active so when I didn't feel her move one day I went to the hospital. They couldn't find her heartbeat with the machine so they did an ultrasound and I could tell from how lifeless she looked that something wasn't right. My nurse brought me the phone so I could speak to my doctor and he told me they were going to induce me so I could birth her but that she did pass away. Me and my husband were devastated and I spent 4 days bound to a hospital bed being induced with pills every 4 hours. Indiya was finally born August 13th 2013 and was 10 inches and 12 oz. The nurse told me I had a healthy baby girl who was her big sister's twin. She tangled herself in her cord. It's hard to see the positive when you're hurting so much and I honestly feel this is a pain that will never go away. She was my firstborn and will always be just that. I wish everyday that this was a nightmare and she still be here with me.

• by Falon Shifflett Charlottrsville
• 10 years ago

I was 41 weeks pregnant on Febuary 17th 2013. My son lost his heartbeat and on Febuary 18th I delivered him. His cord was wrapped around his neck. I like to think he was born sleeping. I had a very good pregnancy and had no problems except the normal sickness and heartburn. I went to the hospital twice on the same day because I was having contractions and was in labor. Since it was the first time they sent me to the hospital. But within 5 hours I went back when they found that my son had no heartbeat. This has destroyed me & it's something I will never heal from or ever get over. I love him more than anything! He is my strength that keeps me going. I love you Kasen Emery Shifflett.

• by Azerbaijan
• 11 years ago

I lost my son on 14, 2013. Everything was all right. I've been waiting for him with a big excitement. He would be my first baby. Unfortunately he was my big loss after my dad's death. When I lost my dad I thought nothing could hurt me more than his death. But after my little angel I understood there is always worse. I felt empty and out of place. When I touched my tummy, well I can't express my feelings. I am sure the people who had this experience before could understand. I couldn't see his face and didn't hear his voice. it was a big disappointment in my life. No words could help me cuz nothing would bring him back. When it was raining after his death I started crying and felt so much pain in my heart. His little, innocent body was under the wet, cold ground. But later I understood that it wasn't true cuz he was an angel and went to heaven. And he feels so happy. No crying, no pain. This is the thought that made me feel strong. Now I am pregnant again. God sent me my little angel's sibling.

• by Tiffanie Combs
• 11 years ago

My son Landon Shade Daniel Brewer passed away June 4, he would be 7 yrs. old now, I was 37 weeks. His cord was too short and pinched shut. I was however able to hold him, have keepsakes, footprints, and pictures so I got some closure. But he is Gods little angel now, he watches over his 2 little brothers. One day I will get to hold him again in heaven.

• by Jannet, South Africa
• 11 years ago

I'm sorry for everyone's loss...In 2005 we lost our perfect little girl at 21 weeks. I went into early labor due to an incompetent cervix. She was beautiful, but not strong enough yet to survive the birth process or moreover the world.
Life as I knew it ended for ever. Pregnancy became an illness. We carried on to have two healthy boys (with the help of cervical stitches and months of bed rest).
Then in July 2010 we fell pregnant again with a little girl. She was born at 23 weeks and died in my arms 15 min later.... Believe you me, this poem grabbed at my heart. So many raw emotions that never completely heal.
Thank you for all your stories. May all our angels forever watch over us and know they will always be in our heats.

• by Khadija, Philadelpia
• 11 years ago

I'm also sorry for everyone loss. I guess everyone who actually read the this poem experienced it or knows someone who did. Well ladies I also experience this hurt recently I found out I was pregnant in October 17,2011 and my due date was June 6, 2012 I was 30 weeks when I didn't feel much movement my baby was very active in my belly so it was unusual so went to the hospital on April 5, 2012 and found out the worst news ever my baby heart stopped. I remember I couldn't stop crying my baby is my angel yes I know but still hurt and I am also scared to try again. I feel a little better that my feeling is natural and other people went through the same. Once again sorry for everyone loss.

• by Felicia, California
• 12 years ago

Hello I'm sorry for everyone's loss, my baby boy was due right on Christmas day. My husband and I were very happy just thinging about our Christmas baby. I went into labor on the 20th of December, everything was going good I had dilated completely and it was time to push..after a few times pushing, I noticed the doctors facial expression changed, he ordered an emergency c-section. I remember being very sleepy during the procedure, I was scared to fall asleep, but I did. When I woke up a nurse was holding my baby boy, she put him close to me and I kissed his face but there was no reaction, my OB came a minute later and gave me the news that my baby boy didn't make it! I broke into tears.. baby victor was 21 inches and weighed 6 lb 4.6 oz. Doctor said the cord wrapped twice around his neck, I will never forget my baby boy.. he was my 1st child, I miss him so much! My little angel is watching over me now. I loved all your stories, and I am very sorry for everyone's loss.

• by Martha Arvizo
• 12 years ago

I'm so sorry to hear about everyone's loss. It is very hard to move on and carry this sadness with us, but life does go on. I now am a mother of 3 beautiful children.

Going over this poem, I wrote the year of 2004, takes me back to that day. For me it's a big blur. Only because I spent all day crying. I don't even remember who attended the funeral. I do see him as watching over all of us. He is my guardian angel. I miss him but see him in my children.

I hope you ladies are doing better. I know the pain you guys are in and how hard it is or think about going through another pregnancy. If you are a believer of GOD then pray. He is listening. It is some what comforting to know we are not alone.

Thank you for sharing your stories. I do read them all. Because I can feel your pain as if I was there with you that very day.

• by Ally, Canada
• 12 years ago

Hello, my baby boy was born June 21, 2011. I started going into labor on the 20th, when I was 25 weeks pregnant and they could not stop the contractions. Still no one can tell me why I went into labor so early. Marcus was born weighing 2 lbs 2 oz and with no complications. He was doing well and lived for three weeks and then he suddenly got sick with NICU and they told us he would not make it so we held him as they took the tube out and it took him 20 minutes to pass as he was still trying to breath on his own. I can't even describe how painful I feel because I miss him so much. He was my first and only baby and I'm scared to try again.

• by Arpita, India
• 13 years ago

Hi, my 4 months old baby boy died on 9th Feb., 2011 due to some infections. Still I am fighting with my emotions, but I am not able to. I don't know how will I go ahead. I loved this poem and I can feel those words from bottom of my heart.

• by Chrsitie
• 13 years ago

I must say this poem is beautiful. My husband and I too were expecting our first child, Harmony, we were all so excited...immediatly after Harmony was born we discovered she had a heart defect...she was rushed to a hospital with specialists of the heart...she was to have a major surgery to correct the defect...When Harmony was six days old she had the surgery....Harmony never recovered from the surgery and died about two months after the surgery...this poem is going on my profile in her honor.

• by Amanda, Ohiio
• 13 years ago

I was 26 weeks pregnant and then I delivered at 3:00 p.m. on July 30,2010 I was told I was having a c-section and I was scared my husband was at work I called him he came the people from NICU told me they might not be able to tube my baby it was small and I said please try and at 5:18 p.m. my son Ryan was born premature and only weighed 13oz. and was 10.5 inches long he was tiny. he lived four days and on Monday Aug.2,2010 the NICU doctor told me the baby was brain dead I called my husband up to the hospital from work again and told him that he was brain dead and he needed to come and hold him before he crashes and we don't get our last moments with him and he came up there. We took Ryan and held him we had the nurses take the tube out and we held him and loved him and at 2:04 p.m. he passed away.

• by Krysti, Ohatchee AL
• 13 years ago

On Feb.14, 2005 I found out that I was pregnant with my first little girl she was going to be here October 12 and I was so excited. I was 27 weeks and I started have contractions so I went in to the hospital and when they couldn't find her heartbeat, she was born on July 21, 2005. I thought my life had fell apart I couldn't go on.
On Feb 14, 2006 I found out I was pregnant with my little boy he was going to be here October 18, well I started having contracts at 27 weeks again they put me in the hospital and my son was born on July 21,2006, God works in many ways and he knew that I couldn't go on with life. My son is a perfect four year old and I just had another little girl. Just remember God does things for a reason, we might not understand them, but just remember that he does it for the best.

• by Sarah Saunders, Aldershot Hampshire
• 13 years ago

This poem truely touched my heart, I had a still birth 4 days before my due date, I had a beautiful little girl weighing 10 pounds 3 ounces, She looked like she was sleeping the most beautiful angel I've ever seen. Its been 4 years on November 4th and it still feels like I was holding her close yesterday, Family and friends told me time will heal, but it truly doesn't. We just have to believe they are our little angels in heaven looking over us. I'll never forget and we will always keep her memory alive. My prayers are with you all.

• by Emalee
• 14 years ago

This poem is absolutely beautiful! I am 16yrs old and I have a beautiful angel baby in my family - she is my cousin Ashleigh!! We lost her due to stillbirth at full term. Saying goodbye was the hardest thing but she is loved and thought of everyday! I have organized a 2nd birthday party for her and I wanted to give this poem to my aunty, uncle, and my 2 wonderful cousins (ash's big sister and little sister) Ash's sisters love her 2 bits. One of them is 5 and her lil sister is turning 1. They both know all about their angel sister and we will continue telling them for the rest of their lives. They will always know how lucky they are to have a very special sister watching over them. We are planning to do a balloon release and I was hoping I could read this poem!
I am soo very sorry for all your losses! My thoughts and prayers are with you all! XXX

• by Annette
• 14 years ago

25 years ago our daughter Melissa was stillborn. We had a doctor appointment on Friday March 7th and all was well, heartbeat strong and reactive. On March 9th I lost my mucus plug and was in early labor. It was my second child and I stayed home to do the early part. When the contractions were stronger and closer we went to the hospital. When the nurse tried to hook up the monitor she had trouble finding the heartbeat, she left and came back with several people and a portable ultrasound machine, to show that there was no heartbeat. I gave birth to a perfect baby girl who looked just like her sister. The cord was very short and around her neck. Back then they did not do the pictures, lock of hair and the beautiful memory boxes, all I have to remember her are the memories, a footprint and a small teddy bear from some funeral flowers. I can remember every detail from 25 years ago, thank you for your poem, my prayers are with you.

• by Noah
• 14 years ago

We went in for a routine checkup at 27 weeks, only to find out that our daughter no longer had a heartbeat. We are devastated. Just knowing others have shared our pain is somehow comforting. I have no idea how we can move on with our lives.

• by frances
• 14 years ago

Hello I'm very sorry for your loss I lost my son when I was 31 weeks and 2 days. I found out that he had no heart beat. I wish you the very best. and GODBLESS YOU

• by valerie
• 15 years ago

this poem is just the best, it has touched me, I love it, I just lost my son and he was my first it hurts so much, but knowing he is in a way better place then we are, is good to always know. I'm sorry for who else has ever lost a son or daughter, it hurts so much. I just thought I would never hurt this much! =[ I miss my son so much words will never explain my pain =[