I Hurt Too

Do you feel the pain I feel when I leave you in this place ?
the heartache and the grief are etched in the lines upon your face
I truly hate to leave you...but you know the time has come
and you'll  be so well cared for..in this lovely nursing home

The staff seem all so friendly, and they'll care for you so well
so please don't look at me that way...I'm in my private hell
you'll always be my mother.. and my children's loving Nan
and I promise that I'll visit as often as I can

So you just cannot begin to know my feelings of despair
when I turn around and leave you sitting sadly in your chair
and you can't begin to imagine the agony of my choice
not to have you close at hand...or hear the comfort of your voice

But you'll have a lovely room. With a window and a view
it's not the same as home I know... but cozy and quite new
And flowers you can see and touch... just like the ones at home
the ones you could no longer tend, because of aching bones

So please don't look at me that way.. I ache inside as well
cause the choice I've had to make for you has been my living hell
I love you from the bottom of my sad and lonely heart
and grieve as much as you because life has dealt you this part

So in this lovely nursing home I've chosen just for you
please understand my reasons.. for what I had to do
I did not put you here to take away your home
but you could no longer manage... living on your own

So please don't look at me that way.. my grief has made me numb
because I have to live with knowing what I've done
You're here because I love you.. and you need a lot more care
but whenever you feel sad or lonely.. just call and I'll be there

So don't think that I've abandoned you or put you out of sight
I've agonized over this decision and hoped I'd done what's right
I know your mind is active and still very full of wit
but your body it has crumbled.. and just enables you to sit

So please don't look at me through tears.. it's hard enough to bear
I would not have found this place for you if I really didn't care
So if I've missed a day or two.. still know I love you Mum
cause the ache I feel on leaving you.. just makes me feel so numb