Poems by Jodi M. Kucera

If I don't make it home, please remember it wasn't because I didn't try.
The last thing I wanted was to make you cry.

I wanted more than anything to make it back to you,
But there was a job I just had to do.

As you were sleeping through the night,
We woke to the sound of gunfire; and I knew this would be my last fight.

It's my job to keep you safe and free,
And to do that I will give every ounce of me.

I am a soldier who will defend until the very end,
But that comes at a cost that I know I can't mend.

Keep a picture of me beside the bed and kiss me goodnight.
Imagine my arms around you, holding you tight.

Don't forget how my lips felt on yours.
Or my soft caress as our clothes fell to the floor.

Remember the warmth of my breathe as I whispered, "I love you," in your ear.
Just because I'm gone, my love doesn't disappear.

I know I broke my promise to be here to wipe away every tear.
You've cried a million of them every time you wished I were still here.

Please forgive me for leaving you so soon,
But my country called and needed me, too.

I'm frightened by the enormity of the mountains that surround me,
Blinded by the darkness of troubles of which the end I cannot see.

I'm drowning in worry and my soul is weary,
These burdens I can no longer carry.

This is known as "The Valley," a place of deep despair,
With no hope in sight, I fall to my knees in prayer.

"Lord, this journey is too hard, and I feel so alone,
And I'm so afraid of all the unknowns."

The Lord took me by the hand,
And in that moment, he helped me to understand.

He said, "My child, though the valley can be painful, it is a place of beauty,
For it's in these moments you experience me fully.

It's here where I hear your cries,
And where faithlessness dies.

It's a place of low-lying rivers where your thirst can be quenched,
And green pastures that offer you a place to reflect.

It's a place where I'll carry you when you can't take another step,
And I'll tell you about the tears I collected as you wept.

It's a place where you'll learn perseverance,
And one where you'll discover your purpose.

It's a journey where testimonies are made,
And one where when you look back, you will sing my praise.

So, no matter how painful, look for the beauty; just open your eyes,
For it is then that you'll see me walking by your side."

The honor guard stands sentinel and stiff-backed.
Their tears silently fall, for their brotherhood was forged in combat.

One of their own will be laid to rest,
A tribute and honor given only to the best.

As his family gathers near,
His wife takes her place as she wipes away her tears.

At the front, soldiers offer a salute,
And the casket is draped in red white and blue.

The red stripes are made redder by the courage in which he served,
Defending our freedoms he fought to preserve.

The white is made more pure by his devotion to duty,
A bronze star he earned in the midst of the enemy's cruelty.

The blue field and the stars are our great land and our ideals that he defended,
Because of his love for the flag and what it represented.

In unison, the firing party begins to volley
A 21-gun salute, because a hero he embodied.

And then in this hallowed ground,
The melody of Taps begins to sound.

There isn't a dry eye in this place,
As emotion begins to overtake.

The honor bell rings its solemn toll,
And pride wells up within her soul.

The flag is folded one last time and placed in her lap,
Her lips quiver as she tries to hold the tears back.

The soldier says, "Ma'am, please accept this flag as a symbol of our appreciation
For your loved one's service to our nation."

As the final prayer is spoken and he's lowered in the ground,
Two soldiers offer a final salute to this man who once stood so proud.

You took a piece of me with you the day you left,
leaving me unable to catch my breath.

This isn't how it was supposed to be!
The world carries on like nothing has happened, but not me.

I'm stuck in this uncomfortable place of pain that no one can see.
I ask God to bring you back as I fall to my knees.

Tossed to and fro in a raging tide of emotion;
without you, I'm just so lost and broken.

I can still hear you calling my name,
then reality sets in and I'm reminded my life will never be the same.

Out of the corner of my eye I see you there, but when I turn to look, you fade away.
What I wouldn't give to just have one more day.

One more day to hold your hand
and to watch you live your life as you planned.

One more day to sing our song, "Close To You,"
and listen to you sing it to your son too.

I think about all the things I'll miss,
your smile, your laugh, your kiss.

I don't know how to make it through this,
when all I want is to call it quits.

As I look into your little boy's eyes, I know I have to carry on
so I can tell him about his mom.

I'll tell him how much you loved him and how you couldn't wait for him to be here.
Because of him, I know you will always be near.

My little girl has gone,
but to her little boy I will continue to sing our song.

Forever in my heart,
Always on my mind.
Together again we will be, all in God's time.
Heaven gained another angel the day you left.
Eternity promises you much needed rest.
Rest now, Daddy, I'll be okay because I carry you with me every single day.