Poems by Ronald Doe

The happiest day of my life
Was when I first laid eyes on you
For you were like a gift from God
An Angel sweet and beautiful

Deep inside my tender heart
Actually felt your halo shine
I quickly knelt and prayed to God
And I asked Him to make you mine

The happiest day of my life
Was the day when I first kissed you
For I had never felt a kiss
So tender, soft and beautiful

But when I felt your gentle lips
I could have sworn I owned the world
Right then and there I knew for sure
You would forever be my girl

The happiest day of my life
I guess it has to be right now
For here I stand in front of God
Ready to make a Solemn Vow

A vow to have you as my wife
And to love you with all my heart
To honor you and cherish you
And say, "Until death do we part."

The happiest day of my life
Has to be on some future day
About fifty years down the road
Upon the death bed that I lay

For when God calls me on that day
If I still have you as my wife
I'll die on the happiest day
The happiest day of my life

“You are disgusting”
My wife says to me
When I passed some gas
While watching t.v.

With a guilty grin
I enter my plea
“Must have been the dog
‘Cause it wasn’t me"

“You are a liar”
My wife hollers back
"Came straight from your ass
I know for a fact

I told you before
Won’t tell you again
Go to the bathroom
Before you break wind.”

“You are disgusting”
I heard my wife say
When I passed some gas
While driving today

With a guilty laugh
I enter my plea
“Must be the exhaust
Cause it wasn’t me”

“You are a liar”
I once again hear
“Roll down the window
I need some fresh air

Now why can’t you be
Like me from the start
For I’m a lady
And ladies don’t fart”

"You are disgusting"
Words ran through my head
As I watched my wife
Asleep in our bed

Really felt guilty
Shame every man knows
When without notice
A smell hit my nose

I said to myself
"It sure ain't perfume"
As a fart odor
Spread through the bedroom

Couldn’t help but think
A man she must be
Cause ladies don’t fart
And that wasn’t me