Poems by Shianne

My pain and misery fall from the sky
So hard I try to ignore it, but it still gets by.
Surrounded with memories of what could have been,
The hatred screams under my skin.
Pulsing through my veins is the anger I feel.
Wounds break open as soon as they seal.
Darkness surrounds me with every step I take.
I manage a smile, but do you know it's a fake?
I laugh when people talk to me,
But inside I'm dying, wishing they could see
I'm as different inside as I am the same.
Wish they could see they're not to blame.
I know the truth, but it's locked in my heart,
And now more than ever, it's tearing me apart.

You don't mean what you say and don't mean what you do
You don't mean anything because it's not true
You broke my fall and stole my heart
And already damaged, you let it fall apart
The tears I cry now fall with my misery
Once covered up, now for the world to see
Who I really am inside
For all to see rules to which I don't abide
The circumstances in which reality shall fade
The unwanted feelings your lies have made
The shame when I realized you gained my trust
The truth fading as the dust
Slips through my fingers grain by grain
My heart's not only torn but slain
As shards of glass fall from the sky
Tears of blood fall from my eye
Your words crawled across my skin
And I forget what I don't believe in
My heart pounds as I lift my head
Dare to enter where no one has tread
And I looked deep into your eyes
Found the source of all your lies
And even though I know they'll never be true
With all my heart, I'll continue loving you

The truth you tell me hurts more than your lie
Once I learned it, I started to cry
Every time I thought of you
I remembered what I thought was true
I try to cover it as I mend my heart
It's no use, I'm broken apart
Into a million pieces I've been shattered
Not that you cared, not that it mattered
The truth hurts more than I thought
Reality showing what I forgot
My smile returns to a fake
There's nothing else for you to take
You took my heart when I learned the lie
Inside I'm dying as I try
To mend myself as best as I can
Hoping that this won't happen again
I'll try to leave this behind
As I start to find
Myself looking at you during the day
And try to find something to say
That won't bring back this painful memory
That won't remind me of what couldn't be
As I start to learn it's still true
I still find myself loving you

The hurt in my eyes is all that has to be said
Sometimes I know I'm better off dead
The pain is the only thing I can feel
Knowing it's the one thing that's real
Behind all the games and lies
An emptiness haunts my eyes
A person who I used to be
Worse even though it wasn't me
Sorrow consuming every thought
Slowly losing everything I've got
Darkness closing in all around
Still I don't make a single sound
Evil fills the void inside
This life's not one I'll confide
However deeper someone tries to look
Whatever happens the ground has shook
The dread and hate leaves me in a daze
All around me demons' fires blaze
Living isn't worthwhile if it's torture
Yet it's that to which I'm not sure
Don't try to understand the words written here
For I'm not the one to fear