When somebody dies, folks hardly ever say "dead."
They prefer "expired" or "departed" instead.
Most of the euphemisms don't do any harm,
Like "biting the dust" or "buying the farm."
Funny Poem About Death
When somebody dies, folks hardly ever say "dead."Featured Shared Story
I found this poem very refreshing and true. Very good.
Humorous Poem About The Inconsistencies Of English Language
Hear eye sit inn English class; the likelihood is that eye won't pass
An F on my report card wood bee worse than swallowing glass
It's knot that eye haven't studied, often till late at knight
Butt the rules are sew confusing, eye simply can't get them writeFeatured Shared Story
Very clever and funny, but it kinda blows my mind reading through this at the same time! How on earth did I manage to learn this wonderful, confusing language?! I must be converting it into...
My Great Grandfather And His Life's Work
Great Grandpa is a wise old man who says he's ninety-four.
He tells me that he lost his leg fighting in some war.
When I was just a little tot with eyes and nose still runny,
He swears that he forgot my name, so now he calls me Sonny.Featured Shared Story
Balter's poem reminds me of my own grandfather whom I lost 49 years ago when he was 94. I remember his two habits very lucidly. He was a frugal eater. He used to weigh his food every time...
Limerick About A Hippo
Harvey is a huge hippopotamus
Who bathes in a bay that is bottomless
HIs mouth is as large
As a riverboat bargeFeatured Shared Story
Hi Rita, thanks for the kind words about Harvey the Hippo. I've got about 20 otherr poems like Harvey. I can also furnish an illustrator. You go ahead and find a publisher, and we can be...
Some are as long as hoses
You buy at a garden store.
Mine can be used to smell roses
From a couple of miles or more.Featured Shared Story
I think children will like the poem. It's funny. You must have a lot of imagination to write such a poem. I like it!
My parents' bedroom is far from mine, so I have to wonder
What the noise is every night that sounds a lot like thunder.
We don't live near the seashore, but almost every morn
I'm wakened by a noise that sounds like a fog horn.Featured Shared Story
The writer has given a humorous touch to a common incident found in many a home. Mother's lighthearted comment, "I don't mind; it's really a godsend" makes the idea more effective.
Crowded ClosetWishing For A Better World
in Change Poems
Father saw me looking in my closet yesterday
A place in a state of rather constant disarray
It's something I do often to stimulate my mind
Because I'm never certain of exactly what I'll find
Poem About The The Rigors Of Travel
A voyage abroad with my good wife Maude turned into a real mess
In need of some rest in Budapest, about all I got was stress
Then in France I took a chance on some pork a little too rare
I so regret that Monsieur's toilette was very crowded there
Poems by Alan Balter
1 - 9 of 9
1 - 9 of 9