Funny Poems for Kids

Funny Children's Poetry

Sometimes children with their fresh eyes looking at the world may be able to see that which an adults eyes pass over. There are many sayings to express this sentiment. One is, "out of the mouths of babes", another coined by a television show is, "kids say the darndest things". We recognize that as adults we have become jaded. We may miss hilarious ironies about the world that our children have to point out to us. If I had to take a guess, I would say that children are in the world for just this purpose.

59 Rhyming Poems for Children

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1. Sick
- By Shel Silverstein
When children don’t want to do something, they come up with every excuse they can think of to get out of it. There are many kinds of sicknesses children try to convince their parents they have been afflicted with in order to get out of going to school. The character in this poem seems to have come down with every possible illness, but what happens when she realizes it’s not a school day? Shel Silverstein crafts a poem that will resonate with children and adults alike.

“I cannot go to school today,"
Said little Peggy Ann McKay.
“I have the measles and the mumps,
A gash, a rash and purple bumps.

“I cannot go to school today,"
Said little Peggy Ann McKay.
“I have the measles and the mumps,
A gash, a rash and purple bumps.
My mouth is wet, my throat is dry,
I’m going blind in my right eye.
My tonsils are as big as rocks,
I’ve counted sixteen chicken pox
And there’s one more--that’s seventeen,
And don’t you think my face looks green?
My leg is cut--my eyes are blue--
It might be instamatic flu.
I cough and sneeze and gasp and choke,
I’m sure that my left leg is broke--
My hip hurts when I move my chin,
My belly button’s caving in,
My back is wrenched, my ankle’s sprained,
My ‘pendix pains each time it rains.
My nose is cold, my toes are numb.
I have a sliver in my thumb.
My neck is stiff, my voice is weak,
I hardly whisper when I speak.
My tongue is filling up my mouth,
I think my hair is falling out.
My elbow’s bent, my spine ain’t straight,
My temperature is one-o-eight.
My brain is shrunk, I cannot hear,
There is a hole inside my ear.
I have a hangnail, and my heart is--what?
What’s that? What’s that you say?
You say today is. . .Saturday?
G’bye, I’m going out to play!”
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I routinely skipped school for some reasons that even I couldn't understand at the time. In a thorough medical checkup after 10th grade, my parents realized that I couldn't see well. I...

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2. Being Brave At Night
- By Edgar Guest
During the day children are busy and don't have time to waste worrying about silly monsters, but children lying in bed at night waiting to fall asleep have lots of time to worry about invading giants, ghosts or elephants. To a child's mind, sticking close to an all powerful parent is actually a really sensible survival strategy.
Being Brave At Night is published in the book Rhymes Of Childhood (1924), a collection of poems by Edgar A. Guest about home, childhood and family.

The other night 'bout two o'clock, or maybe it was three,
An elephant with shining tusks came chasing after me.
His trunk was wavin' in the air an' spoutin' jets of steam
An' he was out to eat me up, but still I didn't scream

The other night 'bout two o'clock, or maybe it was three,
An elephant with shining tusks came chasing after me.
His trunk was wavin' in the air an' spoutin' jets of steam
An' he was out to eat me up, but still I didn't scream
Or let him see that I was scared - a better thought I had,
I just escaped from where I was and crawled in bed with Dad.

One time there was a giant who was horrible to see,
He had three heads and twenty arms, an' he came after me
And red hot fire came from his mouths and every hand was red
And he declared he'd grind my bones and make them into bread.
But I was just too smart for him, I fooled him mighty bad,
Before his hands could collar me I crawled in bed with Dad.

I ain't scared of nothin' that comes pesterin' me at night.
Once I was chased by forty ghosts all shimmery an' white.
An' I just raced 'em round the room an' let 'em think maybe
I'd have to stop an' rest awhile, when they could capture me.
Then when they leapt onto my bed, Oh Gee! But they were mad
To find that I had slipped away an' crawled in bed with Dad.

No giants, ghosts or elephants have dared to come in there
'Coz if they did he'd beat 'em up and chase 'em to their lair.
They just hang 'round the children's rooms
an' snap an' snarl an' bite
An' laugh if they can make 'em yell
for help with all their might.
But I don't ever yell out loud. I'm not that sort of lad,
I slip from out the covers and I crawl in bed with Dad.
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This is truly a great poem describing the vivid imagination of children, and it does seem that children have an even deeper imagination when it comes to bedtime! I think this is a great poem...

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3. Our Imperfect Dog
- By Cynthia C. Naspinski
- Published: February 2020
Humorous Poem About A Dog

Our dog's misdemeanours and idiosyncrasies are what make her endearing.....well, maybe not all of the time.

We love our dog with all our hearts,
But not so much her stinky farts.
Her doggy breath is less than fresh,
Yet we hug her nonetheless.

We love our dog with all our hearts,
But not so much her stinky farts.
Her doggy breath is less than fresh,
Yet we hug her nonetheless.

From barking she will not refrain.
The house and yard are her domain.
Park on the street or walk on past,
And you will likely cop a blast.

Meter readers, couriers,
Serve to make her furious.
Possums, lizards, neighbour's cat,
Will not be shown the welcome mat.

In the name of crime prevention,
Airspace gets the same attention.
We feel safe, it must be said,
From birds that dare fly overhead.

She wages war with the lawn mower,
Outdoor sweeper and leaf blower.
And switching on the vacuum cleaner
Won't bring out her best demeanour.

This causes some embarrassment,
This doggy form of harassment,
But she does provide protection,
And for that we feel affection.

Once introductions make the rounds,
Her friendliness, it knows no bounds.
Though not all guests are fully rapt
With thirty kilos on their lap.

Should you leave your nice warm chair,
On your return you'll find her there.
And when she's urged to please vacate,
She'll turn into a limp, dead weight.

To baths she has a strong aversion,
Desperate to avoid immersion.
Yet she'll display her dive technique
In any muddy pond or creek!

We give her scratches, make her smile.
Give an inch, she'll take a mile.
Stop and she'll demand still more,
Prodding you with paw and claw.

"She's got character!" we all say.
At times it's just a nicer way
Of saying she's our problem child,
Kinda crazy, kinda wild.

For all her faults we love her dearly
And in turn she loves us clearly.
She's our funny, gorgeous girl.
We wouldn't trade for all the world.
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Hi Marybeth. What a cute story...he sounds adorable. It reminded me of our previous dog, also a lab, who was our resident present opener. She loved nothing more than tearing off wrapping...

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4. My Big Fat Cat
- By Christian M. Mitewu
- Published: May 2017
Homework Excuse

I am new to poetry (having only started last year), but I believe some of my work is quite good quality. Anyway, you be the judge.

I own a big fat cat-
The fattest for miles around.
Wherever there's lots of food,
That's where he'll be found.

I own a big fat cat-
The fattest for miles around.
Wherever there's lots of food,
That's where he'll be found.

He's really good at eating.
It's a talent, I suppose.
I'm sure if he keeps at it
He'd win the talent shows.

I own a big fat cat-
He weighs at least a ton.
He couldn't run to save his life.
Yes, he isn't much fun.

His favourite room's the kitchen.
(I'm sure we all know why.)
He eats just about everything,
So that's why, with a sigh...

I'd like to tell you, Teacher,
I'd like to tell you straight,
I might have "accidentally" dropped
My homework in his plate.
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This story is hilarious! Coming across this story, it reminds me of my fat cat, Ziggy, also known as Tubby once her grew. I would compare him to a lot of fat jokes, but apart from that, he's...

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5. Snowball
- By Shel Silverstein
Shel Silverstein's (1930-1999) comedic genius is demonstrated in this short, funny poem that is sure to bring a smile to children of all ages and adults as well.

Bonus pleasure points: If you're sharing this poem with a child be sure to catch the look on their face as they figure out why snowballs don't make good pets!

I made myself a snowball
As perfect as could be.
I thought I'd keep it as a pet
And let it sleep with me.

I made myself a snowball
As perfect as could be.
I thought I'd keep it as a pet
And let it sleep with me.
I made it some pajamas
And a pillow for its head.
Then last night it ran away,
But first it wet the bed.
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I love the humor, innocence and whimsy of this poem. But there's more here than meets the eye. If you look a bit deeper, you can see how we sometimes don't properly interpret our experiences,...

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6. Summer Camp Souvenirs
- By Richard Thomas
- Published: June 2019
A Humorous Tale Of Attending Summer Camp

An exaggerated description of the perils of attending summer camp as a boy. I wrote this over forty years ago for my students. After all the years, it remains my personal favorite.

When I got home from camp today,
My parents almost died.
They asked me how I got this way,
And here's what I replied:

When I got home from camp today,
My parents almost died.
They asked me how I got this way,
And here's what I replied:

This little cast from heel to hip
Is nothing much at all.
Some broken shingles made me slip
From off the dining hall.

The poison ivy's not too bad.
It missed my back and chest.
Of course, I guess I oughta add
Mosquitoes got the rest.

I tried to eat some hick'ry nuts
And cracked a tooth or two.
And all these bruises, scabs, and cuts?
I haven't got a clue.

I got the lump that's on my head
From diving in the lake.
I should've watched for rocks instead
Of grabbing for the snake.

That leaves this bandage on my chin
And these three finger sprains,
Along with lots of sunburned skin
And sniffles from the rains.

I also got a muscle cramp
And very nearly drowned.
It's some terrific summer camp,
The coolest one around.
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It is really a beautiful poem which blends childhood imagination, narration, and joyful experiences.
"It is some terrific summer camp,
The coolest one around."

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7. Englksh Is A Pane
- By Alan Balter
- Published: October 2017
Humorous Poem About The Inconsistencies Of English Language

Hello, I am a retired university professor who had a fulfilling career, spanning 32 years at Chicago State University. Now, in retirement, I fill my time writing fiction, personal essays, and poetry. This keeps my brain cells firing and preserves the sanity of my dear wife. We live in Northbrook, Illinois, and enjoy six children, fourteen grandchildren, and extensive travel.

Hear eye sit inn English class; the likelihood is that eye won't pass
An F on my report card wood bee worse than swallowing glass
It's knot that eye haven't studied, often till late at knight
Butt the rules are sew confusing, eye simply can't get them write

Hear eye sit inn English class; the likelihood is that eye won't pass
An F on my report card wood bee worse than swallowing glass
It's knot that eye haven't studied, often till late at knight
Butt the rules are sew confusing, eye simply can't get them write

Hour teacher says, "Heed my advice, ewe must study and sacrifice"
Butt if mouses are mice and louses are lice, how come blouses aren't blice
The confusion really abounds when adding esses two nouns
Gooses are geese, butt mooses aren't meese; somebody scent in the clowns

Two ultimatums are ultimata, and a couple of datum are data
Sew wouldn't ewe expect it wood bee correct fore a bunch of plums to be plata?
And if more than won octopus are octopi, and the plural of ox is oxen
Shouldn't a couple of busses bee bussi and a pare of foxes bee foxen?

Let's talk about spelling a wile, specifically letters witch are silent
Words like "psychologist" and "wreck" shirley make awl of us violent
And another example quite plane witch is really hard two explain
If it's eye before e except after sea, then what about feign and reign?

The final exam will determine how eye due, weather eye pass ore fail
I halve prepared as much as eye can down two the last detail
I'm ready two give it my vary best inn just a little wile
And then isle take a relaxing wrest on a tropical aisle
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Very clever and funny, but it kinda blows my mind reading through this at the same time! How on earth did I manage to learn this wonderful, confusing language?! I must be converting it into...

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8. Messy Room
- By Shel Silverstein
Shel Silverstein had a broad creative skill set that led him to be a well-known poet and children's author during the mid to late 1900s. He drew cartoons for magazines and became a song composer before focusing a lot of attention on writing many humorous poems. In this poem, the narrator is appalled by the mess in a room, and he finds the room to be all too familiar.

Whosever room this is should be ashamed!
His underwear is hanging on the lamp.
His raincoat is there in the overstuffed chair,
And the chair is becoming quite mucky and damp.

Whosever room this is should be ashamed!
His underwear is hanging on the lamp.
His raincoat is there in the overstuffed chair,
And the chair is becoming quite mucky and damp.
His workbook is wedged in the window,
His sweater's been thrown on the floor.
His scarf and one ski are beneath the TV,
And his pants have been carelessly hung on the door.
His books are all jammed in the closet,
His vest has been left in the hall.
A lizard named Ed is asleep in his bed,
And his smelly old sock has been stuck to the wall.
Whosever room this is should be ashamed!
Donald or Robert or Willie or--
Huh? You say it's mine? Oh, dear,
I knew it looked familiar!
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9. The Boy Who Didn't Like Ice Cream
- By Rebecca Syx
- Published: October 2015
Funny Poem About Trying New Foods

Due to a previous bad experience, Logan doesn't like ice cream. Logan's Pop Pop, an ice cream connoisseur, encourages him to give ice cream another try.

A boy who didn't like ice cream?
That almost seems like a crime!
This is the story of Logan
And about trying foods more than one time.

A boy who didn't like ice cream?
That almost seems like a crime!
This is the story of Logan
And about trying foods more than one time.

Logan did not enjoy ice cream.
He thought it was too cold.
Too cold on his tongue, too cold on his teeth,
Too cold right down to his toes.

No one could believe it.
“Just try one bite!” they’d say.
He'd shake his head. “No, thank you,” he’d say.
“Maybe some other day.”

At parties, the zoo, at the beach,
Ice cream was everywhere,
But as everyone enjoyed the nice cold treat.
Logan preferred gummy bears.

One time Logan did try ice cream.
Took a big bite, his eyes squeezed.
As the ice cream melted in his mouth
He got a huge brain freeze!

“Never again!” Logan said!
“Eating ice cream is no fun!
I cannot freeze my brain again;
I've got only this one!”

No one was as upset
As one man, that is for sure.
It was Logan’s Pop Pop,
The great ice cream connoisseur.

“Please, Logan!” Pop begged.
“Please try it one more time!
Just try a small bite,” Pop said.
“Your brain will be just fine.”

Logan gulped, his eye squinted tight.
Pop Pop was NEVER wrong.
Maybe just one more try won’t really hurt.
He decided to be strong.

“Little bites are the trick,”
Pop Pop winked and said.
“That way the cold goes to your tummy
Instead of to your head.”

So Logan scooped a tiny bite of
Homemade vanilla cream.
He squeezed his eyes, stuck out his tongue
And then let out a scream!

“I LIKE IT!” Logan yelled,
And Pop Pop laughed.
“I knew you would, my boy!”
They laughed and both enjoyed tummies full of ice cream joy.

So what did you learn from Logan?
Remember this little rhyme!
Trying new things doesn't hurt!
And try them more than one time!
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I love this poem! I think this is so true- my niece used to hate broccoli, then tried it again and liked it. If you don't think you like something, try it again anyway: you might find your...

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10. Sneezles
- By A. A. Milne
This humorous poem by A.A. Milne shows parents taking care of a child with a cold, but they are worrying about the symptoms turning into something worse. Christopher Robin, mentioned in this poem, was A.A. Milne’s son. Milne was the creator of Winnie the Pooh.

Christopher Robin
Had wheezles
And sneezles,
They bundled him

Christopher Robin
Had wheezles
And sneezles,
They bundled him
Into
His bed.
They gave him what goes
With a cold in the nose,
And some more for a cold
In the head.
They wondered
If wheezles
Could turn
Into measles,
If sneezles
Would turn
Into mumps;
They examined his chest
For a rash,
And the rest
Of his body for swellings and lumps.
They sent for some doctors
In sneezles
And wheezles
To tell them what ought
To be done.
All sorts and conditions
Of famous physicians
Came hurrying round
At a run.
They all made a note
Of the state of his throat,
They asked if he suffered from thirst;
They asked if the sneezles
Came after the wheezles,
Or if the first sneezle
Came first.
They said, "If you teazle
A sneezle
Or wheezle,
A measle
May easily grow.
But humour or pleazle
The wheezle
Or sneezle,
The measle
Will certainly go."
They expounded the reazles
For sneezles
And wheezles,
The manner of measles
When new.
They said "If he freezles
In draughts and in breezles,
Then PHTHEEZLES
May even ensue."

Christopher Robin
Got up in the morning,
The sneezles had vanished away.
And the look in his eye
Seemed to say to the sky,
"Now, how to amuse them to-day?"
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11. When The World Turned Upside Down
- By Margaret A. Savage
- Published: February 2017
I started writing humorous ditties for family and friends many years ago, but since having grandchildren, my desire changed to write humorous rhymes for them. As I write each one, another pops into my head (I currently have 2 on the go at the moment). I now have a small collection of poems.

The day when the world
turned upside down:
when a frown became a smile
and a smile became a frown.

The day when the world
turned upside down:
when a frown became a smile
and a smile became a frown.

When the mice chased the cats
the cats chased the dogs.
The dogs laughed out loud
at the pink and yellow frogs.

When you went to bed in the daytime
and got up at night.
When birds caught the school bus
and the cows took flight.

When the moon came out
in the middle of the day
and all of the ocean's fish
rolled around in the hay.

When the children ruled the world
and ice cream was for free
and the elephants shrank
to the size of a flea.

When the grass rained lollipops
up to the sky.
When you wanted to laugh
but could only cry.

When magic beans were real
and giants very small,
you would eat spiders legs
so you could creep up the wall.

This all happened when the
world turned upside down
after I went to bed
with a smile - not a frown.

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Hello Anna,
I notice that you sent this message 3 months ago and want to apologise as I have been very busy in other areas of my life that my poems came to a halt for nearly a year. Things...

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12. Dirty Face
- By Shel Silverstein
Shel Silverstein, who died in 1999, was a singer, song writer, poet and author of many children's books. "Dirty Face" is a fun poem to read for both children and adults. Silverstein reminisces fondly about the carefree childhood existence.

Where did you get such a dirty face,
My darling dirty-faced child?
I got it from crawling along in the dirt
And biting two buttons off Jeremy's shirt.

Where did you get such a dirty face,
My darling dirty-faced child?
I got it from crawling along in the dirt
And biting two buttons off Jeremy's shirt.
I got it from chewing the roots of a rose
And digging for clams in the yard with my nose.
I got it from peeking into a dark cave
And painting myself like a Navajo brave.
I got it from playing with coal in the bin
And signing my name in cement with my chin.
I got if from rolling around on the rug
And giving the horrible dog a big hug.
I got it from finding a lost silver mine
And eating sweet blackberries right off the vine.
I got it from ice cream and wrestling and tears
And from having more fun than you've had in years.
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So cute!! Like the spaghetti, chocolate, ice-cream. It's the kids that get the dirtiest, that have the most fun. It's a lifetime of adventure and silliness that they will remember forever....

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13. Halfway Down
- By A. A. Milne
“Halfway Down” is a poem written from a child’s perspective about the special spot in the middle of the staircase. What makes it special is it’s not at the top or bottom, it’s not upstairs or downstairs. It’s in a place all its own. Children have a wonderfully unique way of looking at the world.

Halfway down the stairs
Is a stair
Where I sit.
There isn't any

Halfway down the stairs
Is a stair
Where I sit.
There isn't any
Other stair
Quite like
It.
I'm not at the bottom,
I'm not at the top;
So this is the stair
Where
I always
Stop.

Halfway up the stairs
Isn't up
And isn't down.
It isn't in the nursery,
It isn't in the town.
And all sorts of funny thoughts
Run round my head.
It isn't really
Anywhere!
It's somewhere else
Instead!
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My mum and dad would read and recite all of AA Milne's poems and stories to the four of us in the early 1950's. There was one piece that I can vaguely remember; it was about a leather donkey...

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14. My Shadow
- By Robert Louis Stevenson
A child tries to understand the concept of his shadow. He finds it to be a silly companion who doesn’t seem to understand how it ought to act.

I have a little shadow that goes in and out with me,
And what can be the use of him is more than I can see.
He is very, very like me from the heels up to the head;
And I see him jump before me, when I jump into my bed.

I have a little shadow that goes in and out with me,
And what can be the use of him is more than I can see.
He is very, very like me from the heels up to the head;
And I see him jump before me, when I jump into my bed.
The funniest things about him is the way he likes to grow-
Not at all like proper children, which is always very slow;
For he sometimes shoots up taller like an India rubber ball,
And he sometimes gets so little that there's none of him at all.
He hasn't got a notion of how children ought to play,
And can only make a fool of me in every sort of way.
He stays so close beside me, he's a coward you can see;
I'd think shame to stick to nursie as that shadow sticks to me!
One morning, very early, before the sun was up,
I rose and found the shining dew on every buttercup;
But my lazy little shadow, like an arrant sleepy-head,
Had stayed at home behind me and was fast asleep in bed.
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15. Morning Prayer
- By Ogden Nash
Ogden Nash was an American poet who lived from 1902-1971 and was known for his light verse. This poem captures the honesty of a child who has a difficult time behaving during the day. It’s much easier when he’s sleeping. It’s a reminder to all of us to look for new opportunities presented each day.

Now another day is breaking,
Sleep was sweet and so is waking.
Dear Lord, I promised you last night
Never again to sulk or fight.

Now another day is breaking,
Sleep was sweet and so is waking.
Dear Lord, I promised you last night
Never again to sulk or fight.
Such vows are easier to keep
When a child is sound asleep.
Today, O Lord, for your dear sake,
I'll try to keep them when awake.
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He did an amazing job on this poem.

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16. My Next Door Neighbor Is A Witch
- By Samiya Vallee
- Published: September 2014
Poem about a witch... for children everywhere. My daughter, Samiya, is eight years old, and she has had a talent for rhyming and writing since she was little. She wrote this poem for our family and delighted us with its wit and humor. Samiya loves playing outdoors, reading, singing, and of course, writing. She hopes to be an author and an archaeologist when she is older.

My next door neighbor is a witch,
And she lives way down in a ditch.
Her clothing is a little strange,
Because she never wants to change.

My next door neighbor is a witch,
And she lives way down in a ditch.
Her clothing is a little strange,
Because she never wants to change.
She has a black robe and a black hat,
Green skin and a smelly black cat.
A big fat wart grows on her nose,
And seventeen pimples on her toes.

But...her food is EVEN worse,
Because she eats it course by course.
Her first course is seven dead bats,
Laid on top of seven rats.
Then she has twenty flies
With lots and lots of llama eyes.
Her main course is a horrible soup,
Because it's made with doggie poop.
But worst of all is her dessert.
It's little children rolled in dirt.

Last night she had a witch's feast
And turned into a greedy beast.
I think she cooked my best friend Tilly
And ate her with some peas and broccoli.

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I REALLY GOT SCARED OMG but YES this poem is really so so so funny.

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17. Little Boy Blue
- By Darren Sardelli
- Published: May 2014
Funny Poem About Sneezing During A Read Aloud

Please cover your nose.
You sneezed on Miss Muffet
and ruined her clothes.
You sprayed Mother Hubbard

Please cover your nose.
You sneezed on Miss Muffet
and ruined her clothes.
You sprayed Mother Hubbard
and now she is sick.
You put out the fire
on Jack's candle stick.
Your sneeze is the reason
why Humpty fell down.
You drenched Yankee Doodle
when he came to town.
The blind mice are angry!
The sheep are upset!
From now on, use a tissue
so no one gets wet!
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The poem gives a good lesson how to behave while you are sneezing.

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18. Candy Tree Shops
- By Beryl L Edmonds
- Published: August 2019
Limericks Poems For Kids About Sweets

As I enjoy reading and writing limericks, it was a delight to see that limericks are one of the four poetry forms in the 2019 Summer Poetry Contest. Children love poetry with some humour and a rhythmic beat. I hope to have gotten that right in these limericks I've written for children to read and hopefully enjoy. Five Limericks, each having a line syllable count of 10,10, 5, 5, 9.

If ice cream could be grown on the tree top,
Tiny tummies would be liking it lots.
Any fruit flavour
For all to savour.

If ice cream could be grown on the tree top,
Tiny tummies would be liking it lots.
Any fruit flavour
For all to savour.
Do stop by at the ice cream tree shop.

If only the trees could grow lollipops
With a sharp tangy taste of lemon drops.
Lolly licky-lick
With a zingy twist.
Come along with a skip and a hop.

If chocolate heaven grew on tree leaf,
Bountiful, tempting, delicious to eat,
A smooth, silky, treat
In a chocy feast.
If only they weren't so out of reach.

If bubblegum grew upon trees that blew
Bubbles in the air, to catch and to chew.
Be nimble, be quick;
Remember the trick.
Don't swallow, because gum sticks like glue.

All are welcome at the Candy Tree Shops.
Feast your eyes on all the goodies they've got.
There are enough treats
For all down the streets,
So come and join the jiggery-jog
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Thank you for the congratulations on my winning the Summer Poetry Contest, Brother John. Winning was an unexpected surprise. To my mind, all of the entries were worthy winners. Yours I...

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19. A Day Out To Remember
- By Samantha G. Faulkner
- Published: December 2017
Fun Poem For Kids About A Trip To The Zoo

This poem captures a child's experience of visiting the zoo with parents and being excited about the numerous things to see and do.

Today we're going to the zoo.
I'm psyched, I'm zinged, I'm Scooby Doo.
My shoes are on, my scarf, my hat.
I'm bouncing like an acrobat.

Today we're going to the zoo.
I'm psyched, I'm zinged, I'm Scooby Doo.
My shoes are on, my scarf, my hat.
I'm bouncing like an acrobat.
Come on Mum, come on Dad.
We'll get there late if traffic's bad.
We're on the road; it won't be long.
Mum says an hour; she must be wrong.
Right now to queue, which one? I'll pick it.
I'm desperate now to get that ticket.
Through the turnstile, up the slope,
And face to face with antelope!
The keeper leads along the path,
Which draws my gaze to a huge giraffe!
Whilst licking food from round its face
It locks its neck with a suitcase.
No wait, no case; why, that's a trunk,
But elephant poo's not what I stunk.
It comes from there - the mud and bog.
I spot the snout of one warthog
With bristly ears and curly tail
Snuffling food from a big green pail
Mum declares, "It's monkey time!
Let's snap them whilst they swing and climb."
Two small ones crouch besides the bars,
Bananas clutched like fat cigars.
Mum reads the guide and then she squeals.
"Let's buy some fish to feed the seals.
12 o'clock is feeding time.
Then they perform in pantomime."
I thought the zoo filled kids with glee,
But mum it seems is worse than me.
Dad likes the zoo but isn't fond
Of bags and coats so he plods along.
He likes the noise and even stench
But longs to find a comfy bench.
His luck is in; we find a seat
To root through what we've brought to eat.
Foil wrapped rolls and cans of pop,
Some chocolate from the local shop.
"Stop for breath; you're going to choke!"
"Come on Dad, there's lions to stroke."
"Love, listen close, and please stay calm.
If you stroke them they'll take your arm!"
"Okay Dad, if that's the case,
Instead I'll kiss a gator's face."
Mum takes the lead of all of us.
She wants to see the rhinoceros.
She lures me with a red balloon
Reminding me of one baboon
That pressed the glassed and firstly posed
And then turned round, his butt exposed.
But then it comes as no surprise
They don't make trousers in his size.
It's 5 o'clock and time for home.
I'm sad but tired so will not moan.
There are no gorillas back at mine,
But Gran smells close, so I'll be fine.
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20. Springy Sidewalk
- By Kenn Nesbitt
What would happen if a different type of cement were to be used on sidewalks? In this amusing poem by former Children’s Poet Laureate Kenn Nesbitt, we find out the silliness that would be sure to ensue. Kenn Nesbitt’s poems have been used in hundreds of school textbooks around the world.

The people outside on the sidewalk
can’t seem to remain on the ground.
They’re jumping and hopping and springing,
and generally bouncing around.

The people outside on the sidewalk
can’t seem to remain on the ground.
They’re jumping and hopping and springing,
and generally bouncing around.

I’ve never seen anything like it.
It’s such an unusual scene,
as if they have springs in their sneakers,
or bounce on a big trampoline.

I think I know what may have happened
that caused this chaotic event:
Last week they replaced our old sidewalk
with one made of rubber cement!

“Springy Sidewalk” copyright © 2021 Kenn Nesbitt. All Rights Reserved. Published in The Aliens Have Landed at Our School. Reprinted by permission of the author. www.poetry4kids.com
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Funny Poems for Kids

Funny Children's Poetry

59 Rhyming Poems for Children

1. Sick

2. Being Brave At Night

3. Our Imperfect Dog

Our dog's misdemeanours and idiosyncrasies are what make her endearing.....well, maybe not all of the time.

4. My Big Fat Cat

I am new to poetry (having only started last year), but I believe some of my work is quite good quality. Anyway, you be the judge.

5. Snowball

6. Summer Camp Souvenirs

An exaggerated description of the perils of attending summer camp as a boy. I wrote this over forty years ago for my students. After all the years, it remains my personal favorite.

7. Englksh Is A Pane

8. Messy Room

9. The Boy Who Didn't Like Ice Cream

Due to a previous bad experience, Logan doesn't like ice cream. Logan's Pop Pop, an ice cream connoisseur, encourages him to give ice cream another try.

10. Sneezles

This humorous poem by A.A. Milne shows parents taking care of a child with a cold, but they are worrying about the symptoms turning into something worse. Christopher Robin, mentioned in this poem, was A.A. Milne’s son. Milne was the creator of Winnie the Pooh.

11. When The World Turned Upside Down

I started writing humorous ditties for family and friends many years ago, but since having grandchildren, my desire changed to write humorous rhymes for them. As I write each one, another pops into my head (I currently have 2 on the go at the moment). I now have a small collection of poems.

12. Dirty Face

Shel Silverstein, who died in 1999, was a singer, song writer, poet and author of many children's books. "Dirty Face" is a fun poem to read for both children and adults. Silverstein reminisces fondly about the carefree childhood existence.

13. Halfway Down

14. My Shadow

A child tries to understand the concept of his shadow. He finds it to be a silly companion who doesn’t seem to understand how it ought to act.

15. Morning Prayer

16. My Next Door Neighbor Is A Witch

17. Little Boy Blue

18. Candy Tree Shops

19. A Day Out To Remember

This poem captures a child's experience of visiting the zoo with parents and being excited about the numerous things to see and do.

20. Springy Sidewalk

What would happen if a different type of cement were to be used on sidewalks? In this amusing poem by former Children’s Poet Laureate Kenn Nesbitt, we find out the silliness that would be sure to ensue. Kenn Nesbitt’s poems have been used in hundreds of school textbooks around the world.