Poems by Ronald Doe

My brother was always my best friend,
We would play sports and we'd just pretend.
I'd hit a homer, a goal he'd score,
You see I was Yaz and he was Orr.

As we grew up in The Project Courts,
Nothing mattered except for sports.
We never once thought about a girl,
As we lived in our fantasy world.

For in the courtyard in which we'd play,
The next Bobby Orr would proudly say.
"Ronnie, someday when I'm all grown up,
I'll help The B's win The Stanley Cup.

Score the winning goal in the last game,
And all of Boston will chant my name.
But till that day comes I guess once more,
You can be Yaz and I will be Orr."

Butchie and I played hockey for fun,
And we weren't out to hurt anyone.
But then came drugs, fast money and girls,
And playing sports wasn't in this world.

Because as the years went flying by,
Butchie's goal was to be a Wise Guy.
With the new meaning of the word "score",
They'd be no more Yaz and no more Orr.

I saw Butchie in the project court,
Where we had played every single sport.
His eyes were bugged and his vision blurred,
And when he spoke his speech was slurred.

His face was pale, his expression blank,
He told me he was robbing a bank.
I said, "Butchie, what about poor Ma?
Her heart can't take another scar".

But the madness in my brother's eyes,
Brought out the sadness in my cries.
For there was hatred not seen before,
Back when I was Yaz and he was Orr.

And on the day he was sent to jail,
I had a vision that seemed so real.
I pictured him on a breakaway,
I saw him wink and I heard him say.

"Ronnie, someday when I'm all grown up,
I'll help The B's win The Stanley Cup.
Score the winning goal in the last game,
And all of Boston will chant my name".

As fate would have it, it was his name,
That truly was Butchie's claim to fame.
But in my heart I just wish once more,
I could be Yaz and he could be Orr.

You came to the world,
On a God blessed night.
Your limbs were all there,
Your heart beat just right.
Your sweet, precious smile,
Brought both pride and joy,
And I proudly said,
"That's my little boy".

As your proud father,
I said that I must.
Teach my precious child,
Love, honor and trust.
I had to treat you,
So tender and mild.
For I was your Dad,
And you were my child.

I knew child abuse,
Had been on the rise.
And many a child,
Had tears in their eyes.
More often than not,
The culprit was known.
So I promised you,
You'd not be alone.

For you were my son,
And I was your trust.
As your proud father,
I said that I  must.
Protect my young son,
From being defiled.
And keep my eyes on,
My precious young child.

For deep down inside,
Your Dad knew for sure.
That when you grew up,
You'd want to explore.
Your innocent eyes,
Somehow wouldn't see.
How cruel and unkind,
That this world could be.

So each day I watched,
With fatherly love.
I taught you to trust,
In God up above.
I never forgot,
The first time you smiled.
Or how I promised,
To protect my child.

I'm reminiscing and I'm missing,
The childhood I never had.
I'm triggering and I'm figuring,
There were reasons to be sad.

I'm supposing and I'm closing,
In on all my childhood fears.
I'm indicting and I'm inviting,
The people behind my tears.

I'm reflecting and I'm injecting,
The power of God above.
I'm unmasking and I'm asking,
Why the child was void of love.

I'm a hunting and I'm confronting,
The abusers once again.
I'm a hurting but I'm supporting,
The courage of the child within.

I'm remising and I'm dismissing,
The notion that I was no good.
I'm a fearing but I'm a sharing,
All aspects of my childhood.

I'm a feeling but I'm a dealing,
With all of my past issues,
I'm a dying and I'm a crying,
So please pass me the tissues.

I'm confiding and I'm not hiding,
From the issues I must explore.
I'm expressing and not suppressing,
The child's feelings anymore.

I'm a shrieking but I'm a seeking,
To help heal the child again.
I'm a grinning because I'm winning,
The trust of the child within.