Humorous Poem

A Humorous Take On Our Efforts To Appear Young

I began writing poetry in middle age. For about 5 years I lived aboard a yacht in remote areas of Australia, mostly in the Torres Strait. We had intermittent TV and radio signal depending on the anchorage and I began writing poems for family and friends for special occasions. The majority of my poems have a whimsical quality and this poem is no exception. It takes a humorous look at how we deal with the ravages of aging and particularly strikes a chord with women of middle age and older.

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Growing Old

Published by Family Friend Poems May 2019 with permission of the Author.

They said I was an "old fart"
But I hardly think that's true
My boobs were done in '75
But my teeth and knees are new.

And since my eyes were lasered
I have 20/20 sight
Though I like to sit on 50 k
And hate to drive at night.

All in all I object to "old"
But "fart" is another matter
For I think the valves that seal the gas
Now leak as I've got fatter.

To add to the indignity
And make me feel antique
Sometimes when I sneeze or cough
I spring a little leak.

So if you're feeling young and smug
With a body like brand new
Just remember in 30 years
This figure may be you!

more by Pamela J. Langdon

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