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Abuse Poem

Domestic Violence Poem

From the mouth of a woman being abused by her spouse, "I wonder if this is how my life will be from now until I die."

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I can completely relate to your experience. Mine was exactly the same and my thoughts were equal to yours. I was beat 54 separate times and I never could bring myself to call the cops on him....

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Abuse

Published by Family Friend Poems February 2008 with permission of the author.

He pulls my hair.
He slaps my face.
He kicks me on the floor.

I love him so much,
So I don't have the strength
To walk right out the door.

There's blood on my face.
Everything hurts,
And all I can do is cry.

I made him mad,
So this is what he does.
I wish I knew his reason why.

My heart won't let me leave him,
And it hurts too much to try.

I wonder if this is how my life will be
From now until I die.

He says he's sorry.
He takes me in his arms.
He even starts to cry.

I tell him I forgive him
And that everything is fine.

For now at least because I know
It will happen again in time.

Stories 20
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Has this poem touched you? Share your story!

by Phe
2 years ago

I'm 22 years old. I have been in a abusive relationship for about two years now with someone who is 5 years older than me who has bipolar disorder and schizophrenia. It has been very challenging for me to stay with him often times found myself packing my bags walking out and goin right back in. I've Been choked, slapped, punched ....Recently slamming my head against my car which cause me to finally press charges and get a restraining order. He said he was sorry every time just to abuse me over and over again.
It's not love if it hurts ...
It's not love to feel that way and never was ..
He just used my heart away until I could no longer want to come back.
I think if I would have been pressed charges I would not have been fighting for my life two days ago and got my head slammed or punched twice while driving. He said he wanted to be normal but I make him that way by being smart out the mouth or expressing how I feel which makes him angry. Maybe him going to jail will help

by Elyse Kennedy, California
1 year ago

I can completely relate to your experience. Mine was exactly the same and my thoughts were equal to yours. I was beat 54 separate times and I never could bring myself to call the cops on him. The last beating, he almost killed me. I was black & blue from head to toe. It went on for almost 4 hours. I was I unconscious twice. Luckily, I survived. The severity of it changed him too. About 2 weeks later while I was asleep, he went out and basically purposely got himself arrested so as to stop himself from being able to hurt me anymore. Long story short he did 10 years in prison. He got out 2 years ago and was a changed man. So to answer your question, yes, jail may help yours, but it will take a lot of work, effort, honesty and a real desire to change on his part. I wish you all the best. Take care.

by Emmalyn Grace
3 years ago

My mom cries the words of this poem every day. Even before the guy she is with now, she did the same with the one before. My baby brother was taken from her and from us.... All we wanted was to love him and be there to help and see him grow. At the age of two, he would hit himself and say, "Daddy hit!" in our supervised visitations, which we would drive an hour to every day - they were scheduled. Countless times, we would drive all that way just to watch the other parents play with their babies because his dad would never show. Eventually, he started bringing him. I remember we celebrated his birthday with him one of the visits. We brought him a whole car full of gifts and even a backpack to take some home with him.

by Steven McKinnon
3 years ago

My son is in an abusive relationship. He always makes excuses for his partner's behavior. My son says that he made him mad. He said he was sorry. He says he won't do it again. It's a broken record. It's always the same thing. And although my son knows that I grew up in an abusive household and I tell him that his partner won't change, my son refuses to leave him. I'm heartbroken. I don't know what to do. I fear for my son's life.

by Christine Reid
3 years ago

I find this to be true. I lived under an abusive household of my father to my mother. Back in the day, you kept your mouth shut. What goes on in the household stays there. After leaving home, I felt this was just what a relationship was to be. I found myself in an abusive relationship. I found myself back home with my parents. I'd reach out to my mother, but all she saw was he had a big house and was a good provider. I really don't think they believe me. While at my parents’, house they'd do things to force me to leave their house, knowing I had no place to go but to my abuser. My mom thought it was ok. Dad too. I left to go into a domestic violence shelter, and after hearing the other women's stories in the group, it was like a repeat of my story. It was there where I became knowledgeable about domestic violence and that I was being abused. I opened my mouth and went through the legal process and found out in the midst of that my mother would be testifying against me for my abuser.

by Brenda Ellison
4 years ago

I'm 55, and I've only known this kind of life. Every man I've been with has abused me in every way from the time I was able to date. I can't understand why I pick these kinds of men. I don't remember my childhood. They say my dad was mentally abusive to my mom, but I don't remember that. I think now that is why I pick the men I do. I'm in one now. I've done thing that I'm not proud of. When my dad died and my son died I didn't care anymore, so I couldn't handle my husband abusing me so I started doing drugs and writing checks but couldn't pay. I ended up going to prison and now I'm doing the same thing over again. Only been out a year and I'm looking of doing time again. My mom has cancer, and my sister's husband died and my other sister's husband left her and I see myself doing it all over again. I won't ever let my family go without nor will I let them hurt, so I hide mine once again. The abuse I go threw daily is so bad I'm doing drugs.

by Sol Ribeiro
2 years ago

Dear, I see that you know exactly what you’re doing is putting you down. You know that punishing yourself by doing wrong things will not bring your son back and won’t fix anything. Enjoy your freedom and try to “write” a new book of your life. Try to look for God inside your heart. Visit any church. They will know how to help you. You have the power to change everything...we all do. Quit drugs, quit excuses and all things that you believe are wrong. Those are things that will always hold your life back and won't let you grow.

by Mel Dee
3 years ago

You need to gain your power back and understand you can't change what you're not acknowledging. Your choices at the age of 55 are due to your lifetime experiences. You need to be strong and understand there is light at the end of the tunnel. Why don't you go to a doctor and explain to them what's going on instead of self-medicating? You will feel so much better and have the support you need and deserve. I'm in a similar situation, but I'm young enough to be your daughter. I hope when I'm 55 I'm not living how I am now. I hope you get the help you need, and I'm sorry to hear what's happened to you. Unfortunately, the cycle will continue until you put a stop to it.

by Forget About Me Not
4 years ago

Hey, I haven't been through it, but for years I watched my mother going through that, and it drove me to a point that I feel it’s my fault and I want to hurt my father for treating her like that. I am 16 years old, and I have a boyfriend. He never once laid his hand on me for the past 2 years we’ve been together. I’m grateful he is like that. My mother has gone through so much. It makes me want to work hard so I can give her a home of her own and show my father that he is not needed.

by LilMamas18, United States
6 years ago

Oh my! Reading this poem literally touched my heart. I'm in tears because that is exactly how I feel, and I can relate so much. This is a wonderful poem!

by Jamesanna Robles, Ohio
7 years ago

I just left a relationship with my husband and I'm hunted by nothing but his nightmare, of that last time he put his hands on me and my head into a wall. I'm scared, I'm hurt, and half the time I blame myself. I've tried so much to move on but I feel like I've changed.

by Natasha, NYC
9 years ago

This poem touched my hurt and gave me goose bumps because it reminds me of my ex ...

by Julie, UK
9 years ago

This says it all. The hopelessness and resignation. Beautifully and succinctly put, thank you for sharing your poem. I totally related to your experiences. I hope you got out. It's confusing to be free. It took me 3 years to breathe again.

by Df, Ny
9 years ago

My daughter's live-in boyfriend abused her for over eleven years. He was 17 years older than her. They had two beautiful girls, 2 and 3, together. He would threaten with taking the girls and telling her that she would never raise them. Unfortunately his wish came true by causing an "accident" which resulted in her death at the age of 30. No charges were filed as he knew someone inside.

by Jessica
9 years ago

My husband use to beat me like that. I finally got away. But he changed my life forever. I will never be the same. It's hard to have a relationship now with anyone..

by Angie Shepard, Flint
9 years ago

I was in an domestic violence relationship for 13 years, had 2 wonderful children from him and thought we would never get out of it alive. I experienced physical, emotional, mental, verbal and economic abuse everyday. We were together for 6 months and I became pregnant with my son and then about 6 months after he was born is when the physical abuse started. He had gotten in my head so bad that I was scared to leave so I stuck it out and 4 years later I gave birth to my beautiful daughter. When she was a year old he started physically abusing my/our son and threatened to kill me and them if I intervened at all. Finally in 2008 the dear lord put this wonderful man I now call my husband in our lives. He gave me the strength to leave and 6 years later I am married, my children call my husband dad and we all are the happiest we have EVER been. I encourage anyone in an abusive relationship PLEASE know that you are strong and a survivor.

by Ash, MI
10 years ago

You guys do not deserve that. I was in an abusive relationship and somehow I got out of it. I felt so free. But then I thought it was the end in my life with domestic violence I was wrong. My two cousins, aunt, and uncle were killed by my cousins husband on 7-7-11, she did not get any help we had no idea it was that far. She thought that she could handle it on her own. No one can do it alone but there are places that will get you away from it.

by Tt, NY
12 years ago

I'm in a relationship like that now. My husband beats me and told people it was me. He tell me he will take my kids away. To make me stay. I was seeing a counselor and was making a safety plan. He found out and took my kids and now I facing jail time even after they know he choked and beats on me. I can't believe that he can get away with it, but he did. Telling me I have to beg to get back my kids and house... so thanks for telling your story

by babygirl
14 years ago

my daddy did this to my mommy...not as bad but he hurt her...I was very young. but it is always there and you will never be able to forget it

by Qt, Glendora, Ca
7 years ago

This last time he put his hands on me I thought he was going to rip my eye out. Thankfully he didn't, but unfortunately my daughter saw the whole thing and our newborn was in my arms when he tried to do that. I could tell my daughter was mortified to see her father doing this to her mother...that is when I said I'm through, I have to get out and never come back. I was thinking out loud and it cost me, he said that I was going to die but starting with my mother. He has a gun but would he really kill me? Is he capable of murder or is he just angry?? Tonight he was the angry-est he has ever been, it's almost as if he was posessed. I need to get out, I want to get out,...I'm getting ready, I have a plan.