Abuse Poem

I'm 17 and have been sexually abused for 8 years. It's still not over it completely, and the future doesn't seem too good. So for anyone in my position, please don't feel alone because I know what it feels like. I hope that for every abused child out there everything will be okay. Just don't ever give up the fight because you've done nothing wrong. I just wish someone, somewhere, would try and understand. I know it's hard to be happy...it's the hardest thing in the world. So I wrote this poem to express how I feel. I hope you like it.

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This was just so sad and painful to read and yet beautifully written. You are so brave, and I feel so very proud of you. My case was recently dropped in July because of not enough evidence....

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No Way Out From Sexual Abuse

©

Published: October 2008

He came into my life
when I was just a little girl.
I was happy and young,
And then he changed my world.

One night I was in bed,
And he came to say goodnight,
except he took a little longer
before he turned out the light.

He really hurt me that night,
and I didn't know what to do.
I thought it happened to most,
to every little boy and girl.

I lay in bed that night
hurting inside and out.
Tears streaming down my face,
I tried hard not to shout out.

I put that tragic night
to the back of my head,
playing games at school;
there was nothing to be said.

A year had passed along,
and then it happened again.
My mum was out at work;
it was him and me again.

I was sat next to him
just watching the TV
when he pulled me close to him
and again molested me.

I thought it only happened once
when I had done something bad,
but now I knew I was wrong.
I felt alone and sad.

And 8 years on I got
the courage to tell someone.
The police got involved and stuff.
I was hated by my mum.

She kicked me out that day
and stuck right by his side,
saying I was attention-seeking
and that it was all lies.

So in the end it got too much,
and I told the police I lied.
Everything went back to normal
I swear I wish I'd died.

Everything was going well
until he sent me those texts
saying he would kill himself;
it was all my fault instead.

So I went back to the police
and told them it all again.
He's moved out for now.
It's investigating time again.

But my mum still hates me
and thinks it's all a lie.
I feel so alone right now.
I wish I would just die.

I've told a couple of friends,
but it's hard for them, you see,
to put up with something as stupid
as a teenager like me.

All I do is mope and cry
because no one understands
what I feel inside each day.
Please, someone take my hand.

I cut myself sometimes
when the pain gets too much.
I hate him for what he did
and where he used to touch.

I often think I'll run away
or step into the road.
My future seems so black and dim.
I'm only 17 years old.

And if the case is dropped,
he will come back home again,
and I'll be back to where I began...
in a world of sadness and pain.

I hope someone hears my cry
and says they understand.
I just don't know what to do anymore.
I'm scared and on my own.

So you see, I'm stuck forever.
I just want to scream and shout,
but there's something you have to know.
That for me, there's no way out.

more by Louise

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Has this poem touched you? Share your story!
  • by Skylarrae162
  • 7 months ago

I can relate to this somehow. I was sexually abused when I was in a relationship with my ex. I was with him for 7 and a half months. I wanted to leave, but he threatened everyone that I cared about if I told a soul. My friend found out through my poems and the bruises I had and all the ER visits. She told my teacher. Then she told the counselors, and it kept on going and going. I had not been so embarrassed in my life before that. They called me slut and said that I deserved it. Till this day I knew he had an ex, but she had it worse than I did, and together we took him down, but he recently got out on bail. I hope that no one ever has to go through what I did. It is a horrific act, and there is no justification for it.

  • by Anna Lostgirl
  • 7 months ago

I was sexually assaulted, and I will never forgive my abuser. But I forgive me. I was a victim. I was a child. They have to live with the fact of what they did. I, at 43 years old, have finally found peace. I'm no longer a victim. I'm a warrior. I survived. You will find the strength to get through it. Don't give up. Take a day, make it yours. You are stronger than you would ever believe it to be. Much love.

  • by Veronica M
  • 9 months ago

I'm sorry. I'm sorry your mom doesn't believe you. That hurts me. I wish I could be there for you. I was also sexually abused at age 13 and 14 and 18. I still cry at night. Sometimes I feel blessed that I have my mother who has been there since I told her. I hope your life gets better. It will be hard, but you're not alone.

  • by Mickayla Verhalen
  • 11 months ago

Too scared to think, how could she possible speak? To say no felt impossible. Instead she cried in pain. Like fire, tears ran down her face. The pillow soaked as she got up. Standing before the very man, she held her tears in the best she could. To scream is all she wanted, yet she stumbled as she walked away. She left that day feeling robbed, robbed of hope, happiness, her pride. And every feeling she felt before was gone. It was as if she'd left her own body behind. She could see everything going on around but couldn't do anything. She'd lost everything she had, still expected to cope with life. How could she ever live like this? Like she was nothing at all. Her heart breaking slowly as the tears ran faster. She cried and screamed, locked away, hidden in her room alone. Alone as always...she died inside.

  • by Laura Gibbard
  • 1 year ago

I have to say that this is probably one of the BEST and yet SADDEST poems I have ever read. As a survivor of all types of abuse, including sexual abuse by the hands of my own father, I can truly relate. I find it to be most disturbing, sickening, and maddening that your mother is in total denial and not protecting you as a mother should. Not sure how long ago this was written or if your situation is still the same or not, but for your sake and sanity, I hope it is not. Honey, you MUST get help from someone, somewhere. Call your local department of human services and explain your situation to them. They will know what to do, get you out of that environment and into a safe place.

  • by Anonymous123
  • 1 year ago

I came across this poem whilst searching solutions to being sexually abused as a child. Like many here, I feel like I can relate to this. I'm currently 17 years old and I was molested at the age of 12 by my step-father. My mother had recently given birth to my sister and they had been growing apart. I guess he thought coming to me would make himself feel better. The worst part was when I told her and she didn't believe me. She said I was exaggerating and I must have provoked it. To this day she still makes remarks about it and I can't stop myself from escaping to my room and bursting into tears. I have told a few close friends over the years which has not yet helped. At the time when I told my mother, she told me not to go to the police because then my sister would be taken into care and it would all be my fault. Now, I don't know what to do and I'm still stuck in this house, having to see him. I find it hard not to cry myself to sleep wondering what I did so wrong to suffer like this.

  • by Betty James
  • 1 year ago

You did nothing wrong. When you think it's your fault, rebuke it. Say out loud I am stronger than I think. I will climb way above this. That guy has to answer to God for this. I promise you. Cry out to Jesus, "Help me, Jesus." He will. Jesus is my best friend over all. I trust him. You will rise above, young lady. I'm praying now for you. Forgive him so you can let go and forgive yourself for blaming yourself. You are totally innocent of this.

  • by Marie Fisher
  • 1 year ago

I'm 48. I was sexually abused at the age five by two family members. It was from my stepfather and uncle. I have never gotten over it. I don't know how I'm ashamed of myself. I tried to be good, but even though I was, I still felt punished. Please tell me how to get through this.

  • by Anonymous123
  • 1 year ago

Thank you so much for your reply. My 18th birthday was a few days ago and it has made me realize how truly unhappy I am living in this household. So I've decided to move out. I am currently in the process of contacting my birth father for the first time and I am hoping he will take me in after the summer holidays. I have felt so lost for so long, but now I feel like finally things are looking better for me. My step father has gone abroad, and I'm glad to say that he will not be returning any time soon. But for now, I need to get away from this house and the bad memories it has created for me over the years. I won't be returning till after I finish university in a few years’ time and I hope that things will be better for me by then. I hope I no longer feel the pain I once felt.

  • by Michelle Dotson
  • 1 year ago

You need to go to the Department of Human Services. I am a Bible believer and a survivor of four years of molestation. God healed me, and I know that the same can happen for you. Your mom is wrong, and you did not do anything wrong. Suffering is part of living in this imperfect world. God knows this world is imperfect. Yet, the Bible says God will never leave us nor forsake us. When you give your life to God, all things, even the bad things work together for our good. It's a concept that only makes sense to believers. God loves you. Know that someone is praying for you that has never met you. As a first step, go to a church for support. My church is nondenominational, but COGIC and Assemblies of God have sound doctrine. The professionals will do what is necessary to help you and your sister. My hope is that the next time I check this thread, you will be able to say that you went to a church for support and/or the professionals for help.

  • by Debby Wininger
  • 1 year ago

Just wanted to say that I wrote a poem titled "Thoughts Of Easter" and my story stated that I was raped at 5 years old. So I do understand, and I pray that by now you're out of that situation! Praying for you always. There are many of us who have been there. Just keep trusting in God!

  • by JenniB
  • 1 year ago

I know this was from 2008 and I don't know if you'll see this, but I hope you are no longer in this place of despair. I've been there. I know exactly what you were feeling here, and it breaks my heart knowing how bad you hurt.
My older brother abused me for at least 10 years from as early as I can remember. Near daily abuse at night, whenever we were in the house alone, or if he was desperate enough to risk it with our mom just upstairs. I was too scared to shout, and I applaud your courage in speaking out. It took me many years to say something only to be met with a dropped case and a mother who despised me. Honestly, that hurt just as bad. Having a mother who doesn't believe you, blames you, or invalidates you is absolutely crushing.
Here is the hope: It will get better...or at least easier. You will realize one day that it doesn't matter what other people think. Your experiences are valid simply because they are yours. I'm 26 now and I am simply here to say that I understand you.

  • by Louise Poet
  • 1 year ago

Hi. I am the author of this poem. I check on here every now and then as the comments mean a lot to me. Thank you for your lovely words and your reply. I'm sorry for what happened to you. Last August I contacted the police and an investigation is now in full swing. Two other victims have come forward and I am believed. My mum has left him and we are getting our relationship back. I am 26 now and live with my loving partner and my 2 beautiful children. It's been a long road, but my life is now starting to change. I hope my story will inspire anyone else who feels like there isn't a way out. There is always a way out. It's hard, but there's me and a lot of other victims standing beside them sending you lots of love.

  • by Carolyn Isales
  • 1 year ago

I am 42 and have been raped and sexually abused by so many men as a child I can't even count. Everyone I was supposed to trust hurt me either physically, mentally, emotionally, and for the most part sexually. (I just wanted to post this for someone who needs it.) Do not allow this hurt to control you for the rest of your life. Give it to God and let it go. It can destroy your whole being if you allow it to. I'm a living witness.

  • by Hilz, London
  • 2 years ago

This was just so sad and painful to read and yet beautifully written. You are so brave, and I feel so very proud of you.
My case was recently dropped in July because of not enough evidence. I was so crushed. I don't think about it because it's too much disappointment. I finally got the guts to report this man who posed as a modeling agent yet was just a predator to kids. When I was 17 I was introduced to him by my friend from college. She knew him and worked for him. I thought it was going to be my big break into modeling, but he sexually abused me instead. It took me 8 years to report it. Even now, I'm being so reckless because I am so angry and bitterly disappointed that the case was dropped. I am especially angry that the one person who could have really helped my case, the "friend" who introduced me to that man, failed to turn up to the police station both times when they contacted her regarding giving her statement. She knew he was a sexual abuser yet still let me see him.

  • by Chloe
  • 2 years ago

I was sexually abused by my dad, the one person I trusted. I was 3 and never had the courage to speak until I was 6. I just hoped that someone would have come into his house. It is one of the hardest thing ever when you're any age. Any time I see him I want to vomit. It feels like I'm alone. I'm 14, and it happened a long time ago, but the pictures are still there, and that's something no one can ever change. My mum is so supportive and believes what I said. I'm only sorry yours didn't.

  • by Hatsune Miku
  • 2 years ago

I wish I could've been there for you. I wish I could've knocked some sense into your friends. I wish I could've offered you support when you needed it with the investigations and your mom. I wish, I wish, I wish, but all I can do is offer you sympathy and understanding from a computer screen several years after all of this has happened to you. I'm so sorry you had to experience such horrors in your life. All I can do is pray you do not experience this again and that this is over for you, and pray for others like you who have experienced this as well or are currently going through this. This poem touched me, as I'm sure you've guessed by now, and I'm glad you wrote it. It made me remember that not everyone has had a good life, that not everyone has had a life devoid of pain, and that I should help others with their demons in whatever way I can, since we're all human and need love and compassion to get through the hard times in our short lives. Thank you for this. Thank you.

  • by Halia Ireland Mueller Classen
  • 2 years ago

My name is Halia and I am 13 years old at the moment. When I was 6, I was sexually abused by my uncle. I remember the first time quite clearly. He told me he wanted to talk to me and pulled me into his room. He told me to lie down and then he lifted up my skirt. When he was finished, he bribed me with treats and goodies to keep me quiet, all the while telling me that what he was doing was allowed. He continued with this every week while I was visiting my grandmother because he lived there. It continued for two years until I finally told because he told me that he was abusing his own son and quite a few other members of my family. I know that my story is not as harsh or as touching as someone else's story, but for a 6 year old, this was traumatizing. I have told many people about my experiences of sexual abuse hoping that my story might encourage others to find their voice during a crisis. Every person has a voice, they just have to find it.

  • by Mandy L. Elliott
  • 2 years ago

I was molested by my father almost my whole life after my mother died when I was 5. I had a little brother and sister and felt that I was their protector. I allowed this to happen because I didn't know it was wrong until late teens. I also went to the police and ended up saying I lied because my family turned their backs on me and I was afraid of losing them. I didn't go back to the police until I was an adult and he tried to do things to my children. It was then that I was given the courage to stand up for myself, my children and put that evil person in prison no matter who turned their backs on me. Although he is behind bars, he still lives free to torture me by memories and nightmares. Is he living in prison or am I? I pray that you live life to the fullest and use your strength to help others also for there are far too many who drown in the pain. I think of us as God's strongest soldiers put on earth to help the weak ones.

  • by Rose Lynn, Oregon
  • 3 years ago

I know how it feels, to be abused at a young age. Mine started at age four and continued till 8. I never thought a State Police Officer could do so much harm. Or take away something I would never get back, innocence. I reached out to my mother, but she never believed me. Ever since then, I've only been used, somebody's play toy to use and abuse. I don't trust men nor even the cops. At 14 years old, I finally spoke out, in hopes someone would hear my cries. We went to court, but it never went any further then that. How could someone so young, depressed, fat and ugly charge a Noble State Officer with something such as Sexual Abuse? It's been 6 years since then. I just got out of a 3 year abusive relationship. He nearly killed me.... Every night spent crying in a corner, I thought I could find the answers at the bottom of a bottle. Thanks to a friend, I'm out of that and trying to recover. Just know everything will be okay, it's always darkest before dawn. Safety and Peace.

  • by Kariana Reyes
  • 3 years ago

Heather, Indiana
Hello,
I came across your story and realized it was very similar to mine. I was molested by my older brother for 4 years, and he was the person I most looked up to and trusted. I too lost my faith in God and it took me about 6 years to get my faith back. I have advice but I don't know whether to post it on here or if you wish to have reach you in some way? Well in any case don't give up. For awhile I hated God, and was full of so much bitterness and anger. It took me awhile to realize that Hey, God didn't make my brother do that to me. He doesn't make these people hurt us like this. It was my brother's choice to do what he did. Once I understood this I let go of my hatred and turned to God. He took my pain and anger, and since then things have gotten better. Every day is still a battle but the scars are slowly healing now. Don't give up.

  • by Jasmine, Ohio
  • 3 years ago

Kariana, I didn't actually think there was a possibility that there would actually be someone who went through something so close to what I went through. I am 17 years old and when I was 10 I started getting molested by my older brother and this continued for 6 years. I called the cops on him about a year ago. But nothing was ever done about it. So he never got punished for what he did to me.

  • by Esta Moore, Sydeny
  • 4 years ago

When I was 8 my dad sexually assaulted me, I am 15 now and haven't seen him since. When I was 7 my mum got a boyfriend, he sexually assaulted me when I was 11 for about two years until I told my beautiful best friend who went on to tell her mum who told my mum. My mother said she believed me but nothing happened, she didn't care and 3 years later he's still here. He still touches me but not to the extent that it was previously. A few days ago I found out my mother is pregnant to him, I hope to god that child isn't a little girl but either way by the time it's my age it will want to kill itself too.

  • by Alexandria Satterley
  • 4 years ago

I understand. I was sexually abused from the age of 7 to 9. I know it's not as long as you. But it was scary and I felt alone. When I first told, my mom didn't believe me so I changed my story. Then it happened again and I told her again. She still didn't believe me. It wasn't until I told some friends at school that things changed. The day I told them I went home and took a nap like normal, then there was a knock at the door. The police were there and then I was gone. They put me into foster care. And him in jail. I found out while I was in foster care that he killed himself in jail. I was mad I had wanted him to suffer. He got out of it the easy way.

  • by Trudi, England
  • 3 years ago

I was sexually abused from the age 5 - 32years old. You will wonder why at that age I did not leave. 1. I was terrified for him, 2. He told me he would kill me and my mother if I left. 3. I had no money. 4. I was a very timid as a child, teenager, twenty year old. I had no pals. He was a bully and he loved to torment us both. I did tell my mother, but she stood by him. I forgave her now as I am nearly 50 but it has taken along time. Things changed when I made a friend when I was 32, and he helped me to escape from the area where I lived, helped me find a place to live and a job. In the end I took him to court but on the day of the trial, he killed himself. I wanted him to suffer, he took the easy way out. Even thought I am free of him, I still have nightmares, I have bi-polar and I am on medication for my mental health problems. I am not timid anymore but I am a strong person, being tattooed from top to bottom helps. I have pals and a husband. No kids, that is because of him and what he did to me. I do work but I prefer to be alone. I will hate him to the day I die. I hope he rots in hell forever.

  • by Jessica Henry
  • 4 years ago

I know exactly how you feel. I was sexually abused from the age of five to the age of fifteen. I thought that no one would understand. I despise the people that sexually abuse others. It took me so long to finally come out about it. I felt like no one would believe me. But it helps to tell. I give my love to all of those who have gone through abuse.

  • by Madi, Australia
  • 4 years ago

You beautiful girl. What courage.
I survived the hand of my best friends dad at a sleepover. My sexual abuse was not continued. I was 13, still had not kissed a boy yet.
My heart goes out to all of these beautiful people who have been harmed by someone. You are all so strong and so brave.
One thing I have learned, no matter how bad things get, and taking your own life seems like the best choice. I PROMISE you that things will get better.

  • by Thomas Dowling
  • 4 years ago

I went through this from the ages of 1-5. Then my step-dad walked out on my mom, So we moved back to Florida. It took me 5 years to finally tell.

  • by Naomi
  • 4 years ago

I was sexually abused when I was 7 years old, I had never told anyone and I forcefully convinced myself that it was only a dream and tried to forget, until it happened again. I had never told anyone. I UNDERSTAND YOU completely. When I told someone they rejected me and told me I was only seeking for attention and wanted to get that person in trouble. That same person later on sexually abused me as well. I wanted to say you're not alone at all. There is a way out for you, and I promise you things will get better, and at this time I know it seems as if things will only get worse but I tell you, it's up to you to make things better you're only 17 one more year and you can leave that horrid place. Get yourself together stay in school, get a job and show the world that you are worth something. Your past can either break you or make you. I have faith in you, things will get better. It's hard for people to understand how much being sexuall abuse can hurt. Have faith in god.

  • by Jahsel, USA
  • 4 years ago

I was sexually abused at the age of 4 years, I didn't say anything to anyone because I was afraid of it happening again, but when I got older I realized that holding it in will get you more down and I decided to tell my dad, and I told my family and they were heart broken, I prayed to the lord and he answer my prays and I thank him for giving a family who cares about me. I am now 16 and I don't think about it anymore but it hurts my feelings when I hear someone else has been through that or still is. Have faith and trust in the lord.

  • by Paige, UK
  • 4 years ago

I was sexually abused by my mum's husband between the ages of 13 and 16. The only reason it stopped for me is because they got a divorce, even after the divorce I still remained silent. At almost 18 he tried to take my little sister away from my mum. At that point I couldn't stay silent any longer. When I went to the police, they were really nice about the whole thing. Yes it was tough and painful to relive the whole experience again and again but at the end of the day I knew that if I didn't do something my little sister could get hurt too. Finally it was over and done with and he is currently in his second year of a 10.5 year sentence. For me, even two years on, things can be tough but I have to remind myself oh just how far I have come. This poem reminds me that I am no longer hiding my feelings and that I did the right thing even if it was years after it stopped.

  • by Tori, FL
  • 4 years ago

I was sexually touched by one of my best friends I never told anyone until I was 14 it happen when I was in the 6th grade it really was hard but I got through it.

  • by Los Angeles
  • 4 years ago

THIS IS A REALLY SAD POEM :( I remember when I got sexually touched by my own dad someone I thought was my hero. At first I thought it was okay I was only 7 until he kept doing it everyday and would come to my room every night when my mom would go sleep until now I don't know what to do because I'm afraid no one would listen and would think I'm a liar. What should I do? :(

  • by Unknown, London Essex
  • 3 years ago

Please do tell you will lift a huge load off your shoulders...

  • by Ashley
  • 4 years ago

I'm 14 and I have a best friend who got raped by her stepdad and had a baby at the age of 14. When I was little me and my older brother got touched by our dad so I feel your pain

  • by Thehopefulpoet
  • 4 years ago

To all of you who feel as if no one understands...I DO! Many, many, many people understand and have been through sexual abuse. While you will never forget and never "get over it" you can heal and feel better about yourself. I too was a victim and have found a lot of relief in writing and sharing my story. If you're interested you can look me up on Facebook or Hubpages. Also, I recently learned some interesting things that I would like to share with all of you... Abuse during childhood CAN physically damage your brain. Ever hear of PTSD? That doesn't only apply to solders! Also bad or painful memories take up more space in your brain than good or happy memories. So the more traumatic events you have lived through the less space there is in your brain for good things to be stored. Sometimes the horrible things are suppressed because the brain is trying to protect itself from damage. To anyone who is or has been a victim of sexual abuse...speak up and speak out!

  • by Karla Janet
  • 5 years ago

I was 6 years old when i was sexually and physically abused. My mother had no idea. She was so in love with my stepdad, it seemed like he was a god to her. The abuse kept going for years until the year I turned 14, I gathered my courage and told my closest aunt what was going on. Of course I couldn't trust my mom with something so big. I'm glad I told my aunt, she helped me and my younger sister get out of this situation. Now I'm 16 going on to 17 and I try to maintain my mind occupied with positive things. I used to cut to liberate all that pain that would cause me to feel numb. Now I signed up for a quilting class, go to therapy, go to a teen group for abused girl teens and I work out. It really helps because you forget everything for a while and feel better.

  • by Heather, Indiana
  • 5 years ago

I was sexually molested for 6 years. I got raped twice by the man I thought I could trust more than anyone, my older brother. I never told my mom (my dad was never around) nor will I. I'm afraid she'll hate me somehow. I only told my boyfriend who is really supportive and caring. I lost all faith in god and I can't trust any man, how can I. My boyfriend is trying to find a way for me to believe in god again but so far he hasn't found anything. My older brother ruined a lot for me even faith if anyone could help me find faith again my boyfriend and I would appreciate it.

  • by Justme
  • 1 year ago

WOW, you poor thing. I will pray for you even now. I pray for all mankind every morning and night. I am still praying for all you beautiful strong survivors of this horrible nightmare. Please believe in God. He is the best friend you could ever had. :) Keep strong, and we will all pray for everyone in these situations.

  • by Michelle Dotson
  • 1 year ago

I turned to God for healing. Only God knows you from the molding of you in your Mother's womb. God loves you. I was molested from the age of 5 to 11. God is Creator, Healer, our everything. Your life is really only worth living when you give yourself to God. Accept Jesus Christ as Savior. There is so much I could say but I I'll end by saying God is love, and I pray that you start truly living. A life without God is really a continual death spiral. It is not life.

  • by Brittany Ann Sells
  • 3 years ago

I may not understand completely what you went through because every human experiences sexual abuse differently. But I will say this: I've been in your shoes. My sexual abuse started with my biological father at the age of 2 years old and it continued every night while my mother was at work. I would be laying in my mom and dad's bed and he would start touching me in places you shouldn't be touched without your permission. Anyway I went through this up until I turned 4 years old, then me and my mom moved out to Colorado to be with my grandparents. So point being I had no chance to keep my innocence for very long.
I didn't ever tell my mom for the fear that he would kill her and me just like he threatened to every night. I told my mom while I was in a psychiatric hospital. I was 25 years old at this time and had multiple other men take advantage of me in that way in the years before. I had lost all faith in god and everything else in my life I was starting to question. I have had multiple suicide attempts but there is a way to get your faith back. You can start by letting it be known clearly that this abuse will not be tolerated. As well as going to therapy really helps, at least for me it did. You have to learn and realize that it is never your fault no matter what age, especially children. You were the child and they were the adult. They knew right from wrong and still chose to do it. Also you are now in control of your life, you are no longer the puppet and them your master. Instead you're the master.
God will never ever give you more than you can physically handle. Read the bible daily even if it's just one verse. Go to church and stay involved in church activities as much as possible. Do other things you enjoy as well such as listening to your favorite song(s) etc.
I am telling you, it does get better, time does not heal all hurt but time does ease the pain and you don't have to forget to be able to let go. But do forgive them, not for their sake but for your personal well-being. Because the longer you don't forgive them the more control you're giving them over your life. Once again you be your own puppet master not anyone else. Love you always. And remember to smile daily. Stop playing the victim and be the survivor.

  • by Josie Gardiner
  • 5 years ago

I can't believe so many children are abused and many of us are just silent and we blame ourselves and never speak about it and years and years pass by and still we do not open our mouths. We do not speak, because it was a close family member we trusted and yes we loved. Even though I write. I don't want to talk about it. But I've read your stories but it doesn't make me want to tell mine. The offenders die but you still remember. It is a tragedy and a travesty against the innocent.

  • by Nicole
  • 5 years ago

40 years of age and it still haunts me - 7 years old sexually abused by a step uncle - I remember fainting the day after and my life went down. Started with wetting the bed, and became isolated quiet around men, and failed in school ....turned to recreational drugs, then alcohol and somehow managed to get raped while pregnant by my partners father- remember feeling so vulnerable and for many years believed it was all my fault. 40 years of age and my grandfather has just passed away - I have to return to France to say goodbyes but the issue I have is I may have to see this step uncle I'm scared I will attack him for messing my life up as well as my sisters and cousins - I'm angry and feel I have no closure I've tried counselling and hypnosis nothing as worked - I still drink to destruction and relationships are effected I just don't know what to do anymore

  • by Bubblegum
  • 5 years ago

That mom is a b****. Who would not believe their own child? Why would that poor girl lie anyways? Don't ever under estimate what older boys can do.

  • by Ella
  • 5 years ago

So many stories of pain. I am just another one. I don't even feel like telling mine as the previous stories say it all.

The time has arrived for this sexual abuse to STOP. By communicating the pain and outing the crime the collective consciousness of our human race will make sure it stops. So thank you brave young woman for starting off this website and revealing your experience. I am 52, have been sexually abused and am only now (in line with the super moon) able to deal with this. I am a writer, too, and am lucky to be able express myself through poetry, prose and music. Creativity/art is a wonderful healing quality that the body has within, in order to heal itself.

Well done and I would love to hear how you are now. Wow this was started 5 years ago! As I read and began scrolling down, the stories just kept rolling on down like my tears. My thoughts and prayers go out to you all but tell your stories where you can and let the world know your pain (where you are safe) and then get on with living as I'm sure you do xx

  • by Andrew J
  • 5 years ago

For everyone touched or angered by this, please join me at No More Fear Foundation on Facebook. It's a non-profit I'm trying to get started to help victims of child abuse and child sexual abuse.

  • by Brittney P
  • 5 years ago

I can't say the exact thing has happened to me but I was raped by a very well known person. I've told my Mom but she just puts it off like it doesn't matter. I've been to therapy and talked to the counselor at school but nobody can really help.
For you, to know your Mom's not there and to not be able to go to your Dad must be the most difficult struggle.
If it helps at all, I'm here if you ever want to talk about it. It's always nice to have somebody to talk to. :3
I'm very very sorry for what you're going through and I really hope you get through it.
Stay Strong <3

  • by Springdale, AR
  • 5 years ago

THIS IS VERY IMPORTANT TO ALL OF US:
There is only ONE place like this one opened in the entire US. It is located in Arkansas: Children's Safety Center: 1-800-961-3157. Like I said, there is only 1 in the entire US that will provide you with the services and help you if you decide to go to them and confess what happened. I know it, I did it. The record is 1 in 4 girls and 1 in 6 boys. It's a BIG FAT LIE. The more you report what has happened to you all officially, the more they will realize what a HUGE PROBLEM this is and how many more girls are abused. I know two women, three generations abused: Grandmother, Mother & Daughter for BOTH WOMEN. Another one, also abused from Childhood until she left the house. NO ONE REPORTS IT, NO ONE KNOWS THAT THERE ARE SO MANY OF US LIKE THIS!!!! NO ONE (or the government) THINKS THAT IT'S A BIG DEAL!!! Please report them officially!

  • by Springdale, AR
  • 5 years ago

THIS IS VERY IMPORTANT TO ALL OF US:
There is only ONE place like this one opened in the entire US. It is located in Arkansas: Children's Safety Center: 1-800-961-3157. Like I said, there is only 1 in the entire US that will provide you with the services and help you if you decide to go to them and confess what happened. I know it, I did it. The record is 1 in 4 girls and 1 in 6 boys. It's a BIG FAT LIE. The more you report what has happened to you all officially, the more they will realize what a HUGE PROBLEM this is and how many more girls are abused. I know two women, three generations abused: Grandmother, Mother & Daughter for BOTH WOMEN. Another one, also abused from Childhood until she left the house. NO ONE REPORTS IT, NO ONE KNOWS THAT THERE ARE SO MANY OF US LIKE THIS!!!! NO ONE (or the government) THINKS THAT IT'S A BIG DEAL!!! Please report them officially!

  • by Jessica, Maquoketa
  • 5 years ago

When I was 5, my moms bf started molesting me. She was never home, always trying to provide food for the family and what not. Then they had a baby together, and he beat her. she was on drugs, and also prostituted. Then my gpa and my moms friend had started up as well. By the time I was 9 and had 5 years of three people doing such things to me, I had attempted to take my own life with encouragement of it from my oldest brother. My mom come home to hearing about it since the rope had failed me. I was sent to a hospital, being released back into my moms custody, then being pawned off to my dad. I caused my mom to think of it daily, she lost her jobs made everything. my lil bro went to his dad's where his dad beats him as well, and my big bro had come to live with my father, his girlfriend (which we can not stand) and me. I used to love riding in the semi with my father up until he started that as well. 10 years old, and he knew what had happened before, telling me "its okay, daddy's here. he will protect you. I won't let them hurt you again". then my uncle started up, and my dad abandoned us at my aunt's house whom physically and mentally abused my brother and I. we have been recently removed from there and put with my grandmother who we are doing better with. long story short, I had 10 years of it by 5 people. I learned I have few people here for me, including my bf and LIFE GOES ON.

  • by Jennifer Johnson
  • 5 years ago

This poem made me drop to the floor and cry. About 6 months ago I found out that my boyfriend at the time had been sexually abusing my 4 year old daughter for a year. I don't think I ever would have found out if it wasn't for the camera I found. This haunts me everyday. I didn't see any signs of anything going on. I blame myself for what happened to her. I hate him for what he has done and I want nothing more but for him to die. He is now in jail and about to face 45 years in prison but I feel that's not good enough. My daughter now has so many problems that I cant fix and that kills me everyday. It gets a little easier to deal with as the days go by but the pain will never go away. Keep your head up honey and do what ever it takes to keep him behind bars because with you doing that you could save so many others lives. Hugs and kisses go out to you my dear. You are a very strong young lady and I'm proud of how far you have come so far. You will always be in my thoughts and prayers

  • by Jeta, USA
  • 5 years ago

I too was abused by my dad. I too told and was ignored and not believed and considered crazy. When things got heated I lied that he did not touch me so my mother could enjoy her sexual experience with my dad without guilt. After 28 years of trying to prove myself he told the truth after my mom found his writing or diary. She never apologized they divorced and now that I am 30 and disabled with a son I still go through all the emotional abuse from her. If you are abused do not wait tell. Tell everyone. Have no shame because you did nothing wrong and do not stick around leave. I have a kid and everyday I battle. It was my mistake to trust her. A mother that does not believed a kid ...she's not a mother.... She is a abuser also. The more my son grows ...the more I love him... The more I realize how much I was hated. No 8 year old gets turned on by her dad or can creatively lie that daddy made me put his ... In my .... And it hurt.

  • by Classof2012
  • 5 years ago

When I was two years old I started getting touched by my great uncle he would be holding me while I was asleep and I would wake up crying in pain while he was putting his finger inside me and as I laid there crying he told me it was all just a bad dream go back to sleep so I done what he told me. When I was 7 years old that's when it all ended with him see I loved helping fix things with the guys because I'm a tomboy. So while I was up there helping him he had touched me and as I was leaving not knowing anything bad had just happened he told me not to tell anyone and when he said that it scared me. I told my Mon and dad my dad went and talked to him because he did not want my name to look bad and be called names. when I was 13 my cousin that is in his 20's lived with me and my family he would come in my room every morning to wake me up for school but how he woke me up for school was by touching me telling me how bad he wanted to rape me and telling me how he would do it. He would make me.

  • by United States
  • 5 years ago

When I was eight years old my cousin and me were alone. He was 16 and I remember him saying we were gonna play house well he started to touch me and he took of my pants and underwear and started to rub me. He then took off my shirt and kissed me and then he took his pants off I told him no and he laughed I lost my virginity that day. Well a couple days later his brother did the same thing then their step brother. It stopped for a year and then went on again. It is tough to go through. I am now 21 it still happens now the stepbrother and me are living under the same roof and he does it so much in a day it hurts so much and I wish I could stop but I can't. The whole family thinks it's all a lie. I went to the police and they didn't do anything it was me against him. I am stuck and it will never end but I'm keeping strong because I have a three year old son who needs me and I will not break.

  • by United States
  • 5 years ago

I have a friend who went through something like that. It's hard just listening to it all so I can only imagine what it was like for you I'm so sorry

  • by Missloveable
  • 5 years ago

You girls are very strong. My heart sank as I read each one of your poems. Just let me say this no matter how dark the road may be there is always someone that cares. Someone that carries the same pain as you. Writing about it is a great way to control and get over it. You're stronger than you think don't give them the power over you.

  • by El Stevens, Rochester
  • 5 years ago

As I start my story, I'm about to tear, b/c my body is living, but my mind is still in fear. When I say in fear, I mean, for my sister, that still lives in the town where it all took place. She is the sister that got the worse end of the storm. Let me say, that I'm the ELDEST of 12 siblings, 9 girls & 3 bros., one of my sisters, passed away 8/9 yrs. ago. The man that WE TRUSTED, called DADDY, took are love for granted, and for himself! At the time of the sexual abuse, my dear mother was sick, but at that time, we didn't know how sick she was until later on. While mommy was ill, daddy (Kenny) played on our upbringing and teaching of the bible to snatch us in his grace. He would come in to the bedroom me and my twins sister's shared and fondle the youngest twin so much to where she would pee the bed every night after he touched her. Then he would go to the lower bunk and touch the other twin as well. When it was my turn, I would yawn and act like I'm wakening up and hurry and run out the room. But, one time he got me! And I didn't like it at all. He always went in to my other timid sister's room, over and over again, till she got pregnant. I didn't know then who did this to her, for she was so shy and quiet. I can't remember how it was found out that he was that father, but when it hit the fan, he was told to sign the birth certificate or pay child support. WELL, the COWARD paid support. All this stuff, took placed in the late 70's, to where there we're no sex offender list, now, WE are stuck. A man of GOD, he calls himself....ha, what a laugh. I want him to pay for his FILTH! But, I cant because it's to late. I hate him!!!! He took everything away and he's still walking around like he did NOTHING. Where is the FAIRNESS in that!?....GOD, PLEASE HELP US GET CLOSURE....thank you

  • by Megan Whright
  • 5 years ago

I was sexually abused by my brother who was 18 and I was 12. I came out of the shower (Home Alone) and found him sitting on my bed, nude. I told him to get out, but he tied me to the bed and raped me. It went on for 4 years and I'm now 16. He is now 24. He still talks to me about it. And he sometimes still does it. I don't tell ANYONE! But now I'm very scared I could get pregnant, as most 16 year old girls are in their period. So, if you could, please help me out! + THAT WAS HEARTBREAKING! I'm crying because it reminded me. God Bless you for telling us! Megan x

  • by Jersey
  • 5 years ago

I am amazed of all the voices that have spoken on this page. As a kid my mom was not around, I had to bring up myself. When I was 10 years old, I entered the elevator in the building where I lived. A man got on the elevator, and when the elevator started moving, he stopped it between floors. He told me that I better do what he said or he would shoot me. He took me to the roof landing and told me to take down my pants. I did. A girlfriend from school walked by and saw what was happening, and I thought that she was going to bring help. She never did. After the guy finished he told me that if I tell anyone, he would kill me and my family. That was 50 years ago and it is still with me today. What I learned from reading that heart felt poem the stories; we have a hell of a lot of guts; no matter how we feel, we have the power to regain our sense of self and power. Yell your story, we have the right to be heard. We have the right to live a Great Life! And help others along the way.

  • by Jadie, Leicestershire
  • 5 years ago

Hi - what an amazingly powerful poem. I think it's amazing that you could pour your feelings out so eloquently at 17. I have a very similar story: abused from the age of 14 to 18 by my stead. it always happened when my mum was in bed. I told my bestfriend and boyfriend at the time - but as 15 yr olds they had no knowledge or skill to deal with that info!! At the age of 20, I spoke out again. I guess I was very naive as I expected my family (my mother particularly) to support me. I was wrong-and like you she told me I was an attention seeking liar who had always had a tendency for the dramatic!! I was devastated... I've gone through life trying to put it out of my mind ... But as I look back I have self abused a lived in a state of misery. Something snapped last year in me and I managed to get referred to a psychotherapist. It has been brilliant and he has enabled me to realize all my internal anger should be directed towards my abuser. Don't give up on your truth xxx

  • by Grace, New Zealand
  • 5 years ago

I was raped by my teenage brother around five and was given money for lollies and told not to tell mum, I never did to this day. Even though I didn't know what he had done I was aware something wrong had happened. After that experience our neighbors teenager used to sneak in when I was alone at home and take advantage to sexually abuse me. Soon I was sent to work at the age of 9 and after a while was sexually abused, by my employers brother-in-law . No one knew what had happened to me and I never told, I lived in a dark place and my life just stopped I grew up but never moved on still trying to find answers to what had happened. At 19 I went to live with my older sister and was abused, molested by My brother-in-law. I was told if I confessed my sister would kill herself or throw me out of the house, he continued for six more years until I found the strength to fight back. I am 46 and struggling to cope with it again I have been abused by the pastor of the church for 3 years.

  • by Christina, USA
  • 5 years ago

Hi, everyone! I had write a small portion of what happened to me at the age of 13 and 14. I was molested by my biological father, half brother and a couple of other people (sick world I know) but I had a question in my last post asking if it was possible after all these years of keeping inside if it wasn't too late to report it to the police. I finally had the guts to take it to the police after 7 years. And ever since that day I have felt a little relieved. I no longer have to worry about seeing my molesters face to face out in public. All three are rotting in jail as I write this. It was a tough one when I had to see two of them at the hearing. I'm waiting for jury trial for the two and now waiting for another jury trial for the other. I'm so thankful for my amazing family for my support as well as my amazing boyfriend. As of last month I started counseling and so far it's going really good. This message was for victims like myself. I want you all to know that you all weren't the only ones. I was a victim of it. I'm glad I am taking action to better myself as far as counseling. Because I have been angry with the world for a very long time. I never wanted to talk about my nightmare and now I feel a lot better then I did for the last past years. Don't be afraid to say what they did. (These monsters who took that special thing from us) that's what they want. And we can't give them that power over us.

  • by Kara, Missouri
  • 5 years ago

I was sexually abused by my brother for 7 years and I still have not been strong enough to go to the police or tell more than 9 people. You are so strong. Please don't give up.

  • by Roesha
  • 5 years ago

When I was a little girl about six years of age I got sexually abused by my foster care's boyfriend. He touched me in a place where it felt so wrong I cried myself to sleep every night. I was in care for 6 months and I had to put up with it. This story touched me, I don't know why but I really feel for you. I hope you work something out good luck xo.

  • by Marcella Woodridge
  • 5 years ago

We had a fire and then my mom left my father. He did not vaginally rape me, but he made me perform oral sex on him and he did the same to me. He would kiss me on the mouth and after he had his way with me he wanted to pillow talk. He then once greased himself and raped me anally which resulted in me bleeding a lot and screaming uncontrollably. He made me replace my mom in every way even down to his physical abuse. He beat me and slapped me until my eyes were shut and my mouth swollen. The sexual abuse went on everyday and sometimes several times a day. I was his fantasy come true. His to do with as he pleased as often as he pleased and to beat and belittle as he pleased. The abuse did not stop until the day my mom returned. I was five years old then and it took 45 years for the memories to come back. My physical virginity was taken at age 8 by my dad's 25 year old cousin. Yet despite it all I discovered there is life after abuse. It is hard work but my healing is worth it all.

  • by Shen, Uk
  • 5 years ago

Mum used to gang up on me with all my brothers/sisters kick and punch me to the floor everyday till l walked out at the age of 18, she used to stave me for days my clothes used to rip but she never brought me another. I used to wait till my brothers/sisters ate the food and then l used to picked out the left overs and survive on that, most of the times I used to sneak sugar and eat that. From the age of 9 to 18 my older brother raped me. l am 33 and l still have not moved on this has effected all my relationship since l could never trust anyone.....

  • by Lmb
  • 5 years ago

I just want to say that you are so incredibly strong. I know that you have heard this a lot, but I can't even fathom this. You are an amazing person. I have read some of the comments and it is heart breaking to me to read all of these stories of abuse. Anyone who shared their story on this website is a survivor of a horrible crime. You are all so young. I want you to hear something that a very good friend told me - "you can get through anything you set your mind to. Suicide is a permanent solution to a temporary problem." I want you to know that I think you and all the people that posted are incredible, and I cried when I read your poem.

  • by Fay Trezise
  • 5 years ago

I just cried.
You're 20 now, honey. Where are you in life? What happened?
If ever you need a space... I shared my Facebook profile link.
I'm 23. Life has thrown me shit too (I was sexually abused by my grandfather when I was little, as well as other stuff). I've dealt with it. Spent more than 2 and a half years on both eating disorder units, acute psych units and medical wards. Never really tried to kill myself but only because I don't feel I even have that as a right. But hurt myself, god yes, and I've nearly died so many times from self-harm.
I have diagnoses of Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder (I was in a very abusive situation when I was 20 and was repeatedly violently raped and assaulted), Anorexia Nervosa binge-purge subtype, Borderline Personality Disorder, and alcohol dependence. I've just come straight out of 16 months on a specialist EDU that deals with BPD as a co-diagnosis - and I'm at frikking Uni. Never thought I'd get here. Hang on. Message me? <3

  • by Houston Texas
  • 6 years ago

I was molested when I was ten by my step brother. I had a little girl who is now 26 years old I told my family but no one did anything about it I was forced to live with him after that as if nothing happened. I have had a horrible life of failed abusive relationships and not being able to succeed in life. I am miserable. Now that I am 39 and have not been able to succeed at anything in life. He is still here in my life and I realized I do not have to hold this pain inside anymore I was hurt and now I want to tell.

  • by Kara, Denver
  • 6 years ago

I found your poem searching the web as I'm trying to heal from having been physically abused all growing up. I am so sorry to everyone here who has written, so sorry. I cried for you all. I think no matter how much searching and keep trying to find some people who really care who won't hurt us who can be of support. I've isolated myself from people but I'm realizing I need the most to find some people who really care that I'm certain won't hurt me. As a teen, I always wanted to go to someone and tell them who would be supportive. I was always scared to. I'm at a church now where there are some ladies and people in the church I feel at least can be a friend that cares about me. I've not ever tried a support group, it might help. I'm getting counseling now and am cautiously, carefully trying to find others I can trust to care about me even if I don't tell them about my abuse and hurt, just people that care about me as a person to replace those who didn't care.

  • by Iowa
  • 6 years ago

Your poem really hit home with me. I was raped for 24 years of my 32 years here on this wonderful world. Well I moved faraway, to begin my healing process with the help of my now husband & a lot of myself ,I worked my butt off. In a lil more than 3&1/2 yrs I was healed. Now this man was suppose to be my biological dad well, I finally found out he wasn't but he got me pregnant at 16, then I had to lie to everyone. I can happily say he doesn't control me anymore. He started a war but in the end I won the battle. He was never punished here on earth, but God will make him pay come his judgment day. I wish him no harm, I have no ill feelings b/c I forgave him so I could get better, I pray everyday &night that God has mercy on his soul. I hope that all of theses comments help you heal.

  • by Courtney, Australia
  • 6 years ago

Wow this poem is amazing. I stumbled across it at work today and sat there and read it while crying. you are so brave.
Everyone ones comments and so strong and I send you all my love and support. I have a friend who is living with me after she told her mother she got kicked out.
I will get her to read this. Your Poem lets everyone know you're not alone.
Thank you

  • by Inez Aurora, Co.
  • 6 years ago

I did not expect to write my story, but if it will help me, and most importantly help others then it is worth it. I am 50 years old now, and never talked to anyone about my nightmare!! First it started with my brother (he is in prison because he tried the same thing with my nieces when they were infants). when I was 7 years old he used to take me into his bedroom and said he had a present for me, of course I didn't know any better, then he said I would get my present after we played the game. he was the husband and I was the wife. (oh my god) He removed my panties and stuck his penis inside me. (oh I wanted to scream)!! but no one was home. After he was done he told me not to tell anyone cuz we were husband and wife, and that is what they do. My mom was sick and had other kids to raise, so this went on for about 2 years, until he got married. (thank god). Then about 1 year later, my other brother, (we had a big family) my mom used to go to the store, OH HOW I BEGGED HER TO TAKE ME WITH HER, BUT SHE DIDN'T DRIVE, my other brother took me in the room, and pulled my panties down and threatened me. (If I ever told he would kill me) I kept that in all these years! That went on for 1 year. I'm sooo miserable!!
Please if you are being molested tell someone that you trust!! Please. Don't be afraid. I was, and I tried to kill myself 3 times. If this is happening to you, you don't wait! I know its hard, but it's harder when he is doing it to you! And remember it's not your fault! He is sick and has to b punished. Even if your mom doesn't believe you, she is just as sick!!! Maybe it happened to her, but you have to SPEAK UP. I WISH I WOULD HAVE!!! GOD BLESS YOU. PLEASE BE STRONG! THERE ARE PEOPLE THAT WILL HELP YOU, NOT IN MY DAY!

  • by Lydia, Sacramento
  • 6 years ago

To the writer of the poem. I just wanted for you to know that you're not alone and I wish my two beautiful daughters know that they're not alone neither. They were molested by their father whom, they trusted with their lives. The girls cried out and no one listened to them. I went back to court and fought for four months before he was put in jail and was released after seven months. The DA said they were his own children not an outsider so he is free. Is it justice? Now he is taking me to court to ask for the child support that he thinks I owed to him when he had the girls. I had never asked for a penny from him when I was awarded the custody of my two girls, so that was my mistake. When I got the custody of them, they had nothing but anger and hatred towards life especially the older girl. she attempted to take her own life numerous times. I was so busy taking care of them that nothing really concerns to me about the future ahead of me. I pray that you will get your justice.

  • by Carol Hunt, Jacksonville
  • 6 years ago

Accidently came upon this poem...felt the pain of the writer; am sad there are so many of us who can relate to it. I will be 70 this year and am still touched by sexual abuse as a child by my father. How can a man continue the abuse with the terrified, crying child he is forcing himself upon?
In summer I would put all my clothes on as layers between he and I...as if that would stop him..how could he not see? My mother said "You read too much"..."girls who lie can be put away" and the most painful response to the situation was "You're a big girl; stay away from him." We have to be survivors and reach out to one another. I am so envious of the girls who I've seen who have never had to fear their dad. When my father died, it was such a relief but he had changed me forever.

  • by Bahaushiya, Nigeria
  • 6 years ago

I read all these stories and I think to myself, "so there are so many of us!" it's kind of better in your society coz you often can speak out and get help. Where I come from, people run away from you like the plague and you never want anyone to find out that you are not even a virgin in the first place. Never mind how you lost it! In my case, it was my father's cousin who was living with us at the time. I can remember as early as age 3 although I'm almost certain it began a lot earlier! He did everything you can think of which takes place between a grown woman and a man. By the time I was 10-11, I knew more about sex than most people in their late adulthoods. I started to enjoy reading porn material and when I could get on the net, I started to visit porn sites. until I realized what was happening. He already has a family of his own with about four kids and here I was at age 27 and I've never even had a boyfriend! I can't trust men. I simply can't and believe me, I tried! I don't think I can ever be normal!

  • by Lynn, USA
  • 6 years ago

Oh my dear young lady...I know that this was written yrs ago, but I just needed to tell you how Very STRONG you are! I'm Happy (in a sad way) that you were able to go to court, and I hope that everything ended up in your favor.
I, too, am a victim of Sexual and other Physical Abuse-mine started-well the earliest time I can remember-I was 5, yes 5 (my own father). Like you, my Mom found out and blamed me (a typical response when someone you love hurts someone else, you blame the victim-yes even in cases like this when it is husband over child). I only wish I had the Courage You had to go to court!
I Hope You Found Your "Way Out", I know it Never goes away (I even had a baby by my father when I was just 15, and he was such a powerful man, that I had all new 'papers' (SSN, BC, Name, etc.) and I was sent away to have the baby, and the baby girl was taken from me, and everything re: me and the baby was burned! I will never know my 1st child, however, there IS A HEALING~KEEP SEARCHING FOR IT

  • by Rani, Uk
  • 6 years ago

Has this girl got help now? She is 17, so she can contact Women's Refuge since her mother is a right cow! I wished I had a home to offer her - so she can come and live with me and away from these monsters!

Her poem breaks my heart - my little boys were being molested by their father since they were babies in diapers! He is taking me to court to gain custody of them! The trial begins on Monday with the court fiercely suppressing my evidence, and refusing witnesses to testify! What kind of a trial is that????

  • by Angela, Kansas City
  • 6 years ago

You whom wrote this poem, everyone here and then some, we are very much for you, and your safety, work with the police and have this sicko put in jail !!! One thing I want to tell everyone a child molester does NOT stop. My aunt was 14 years old and a man we will call Buck, raped her, years later my mother married and had three children from him, he molested me from age 7 till 9, when the case was being investigated, my mother decided to send me to my real fathers, and went on the run with Buck. Buck went to Oklahoma back in the late 70's where at that time was a non extraditable state ,so he was not taken back to Illinois, he then went back eventually to Illinois, and he done it again with my cousin, and my sister caught him doing it. We pushed and pushed and pushed and continue to push...because "statue of limitations" was in the law, they stand behind not prosecuting. Please tell, and let what happens happens, I believe in God's ways and I also know there is revenge on the other side. Please first get help, it hurts, I know, but God made us all strong for reasons.

  • by Ashley, Nc
  • 6 years ago

Hi, I am 16 yrs old.. I was sexually abused by my step brother while I was a little girl my family only knows of one situation.. I never told them of all the things he and his sister did to me.. she would beat me in the head and he would put his hands all over my body. One night he slid his hands in the front and back of my pants and made me lay on him. His sister made me dog food and said if I told I would be dead. They also made me stand in front of a dart board while he threw darts at my head. They laughed at me when I peed my pants. I grew up without my mother around because she is a drug addict and has never been around. I do not know her only the age and her name. My father mentally abuses me and a couple times has threw me against the wall and choked me then walked away laughing while I just stood there crying. I have a part of me that hates men and I date girls now, but I know god is with me every step of the way. Keep your heads up girls. You are stronger than you think..

  • by New Beginnings
  • 6 years ago

I was abused by my step-father from the time he and my mother married when I was two, until my baby sister told on him when I was 9. He molested all four of my little sisters and myself. My 7-year-old sister testified against him in 1999 putting him in prison, apparently this was his second time on trial for abuse of a minor. I blamed my mother for trusting him and bringing him in our life without knowing who he truly was: a monster. It would happen any time my mother was gone. I even put myself in the position to be the one he molested, so my little sisters wouldn't get it as much. He got out of prison in 2010 and I lived every day in fear after that that he would come find me, and punish me for telling. I found out this morning that he was stabbed to death in a cemetery near the halfway house he was living at in Grand Rapids, MI, a family member emailed me the link. Is it horrible that I'm glad? I just keep thinking.. I don't have to be afraid of him any more.

  • by Love Urselfs
  • 6 years ago

Is there a connection between childhood molestation and being a self proclaimed masochist as a adult? I also cut myself and it rapidly progressed to needing love and reassurance it seems that I enjoy pain inflicted and being used though I know I don't enjoy being used I feel that is the signals I have been putting out. I never got help or told anyone about my childhood rapes and molestation. and now it's to late. So for all you girls please tell someone you feel close to. So that you don't end up allowing yourself to be treated like dirt and used and abused all of your lives. Please please please, I don't wish what I put myself thru daily to be anyone else's fate. Thanks.

  • by Deborah, British Columbia
  • 6 years ago

We can all relate to this heart felt story...thank you for sharing. I too am a child survivor of sexual abuse. I have been isolated from my entire family most of my life since I told my mother. branded the liar and can't be trusted I have spent my life hiding. I wish I could say that God has some kind of purpose in my life but unfortunately for me I have huge trust issues with my God. I have been emotionally paralyzed all my life because of the abuse...unable to forge a beautiful life for myself because I'm not good enough and don't deserve happiness. The good news is that 3 of my sisters have come forward and step daddy dearest has been charged for this 40 year old crime. There may be some time for me to heal before I'm laid to rest in the ground.

  • by Sandrs
  • 6 years ago

I can relate to this poem. I'm sorry for all the little girls and boys that have to go thru things like that but its true our parents are blind when it comes to things like this but don't let it bring your whole life down. I went through this and I thought I would never be happy but I just got strong and now I have a great husband that understands and I have 5 great kids that I watch like a hawk. It hurts not to have your mom there but sometimes its better.

  • by Dean-Na
  • 6 years ago

Your poem really was great it is just like what happened to me. I was sexually abused by my uncle in grade 8. I am in grade 11 now. My mom didn't believe me and told me not to tell. In grade 9 I tried to tell. My mom got mad at me so I told the police I lied. In grade 10 I met two wonderful teachers and they both helped me tell the police what happened and stayed by my side ever since. One of them went to court with me this year because I was afraid to tell my mom. Next year the other teacher is going to come with me because I don't want my mom to come.

  • by Hannah Arendt
  • 6 years ago

I am now 14 and I was molested by my father from the ages of 5-10 and I couldn't even tell anybody about it until I was 13. My father is now in jail but he is trying to win an appeal for the case he is also saying that since mom has epilepsy (condition where you have seizures) that she should not be allowed to drive because she could kill me or my brother and that she is not letting me or my brother see his side of the family. Sometimes I feel like throwing myself in front of cars too. I have also cut myself several times

  • by Morgan, Lansing Michigan
  • 6 years ago

I am currently 24 yrs old and in a court battle with my stepdad. He molested me from the ages of 8 to sixteen. At ten years old I told my mother she asked me not to tell my sister nor anyone else. Well, I hadn't said anything for a long time until the summer of 2010. Well everyone just kind of let it go but I couldn't it was killing me mentally I couldn't stand the sight of him or my mother. She denies me ever telling her about this to protect herself but she is a liar now that I have gone to the police and have started a case against her pretty much most of my family has turned against me. Court will be coming up soon in fact it has already pretty much started. I am willing to share my story with others.

  • by Timothy O.
  • 6 years ago

This is not a poem to say, "I like", & pause. It deserves far more and better, in commentary. This poem and the story behind it is sadder than sad. If a mom fails to believe a child in all conscience, then who should? So, I know how you feel Louise and I believe you. Your poem radiates so much aura of sadness and reminds me of this abuse and mole station or precisely, incest thing. Sometime in my villa a mom caught her man using his fingers to penetrate their 6 months old daughter. She was attracted by the continuous cries of the baby, wondering why, in the company of the dad. That was the end of the union. This is the forgotten memory this poem dug up within me. I believe this poem has a soul of its own that will go out there and touch the thoughts of reason in people and lead them to come to your aid Louise. I pray you will be able to overcome or come over the experience and move on. A concerned comment from a contributor above (Lin, Carson) suggested that since you no longer trust the police and your mom that you should make contact with the following, to wit National Hotlines; 1-800-4-A-CHILD & 1-800-799-7233. And tell it as you know it. I go with them even though I'm thousands of miles away and don't worry, one day, the Lords of Karma will come after him. Yours is a living poem with a problem shared. Consider the said problem solved. Let it not take away your happiness in future. With love and affection.

  • by Warren, Houston Texas
  • 6 years ago

To Louise,
I doubt if you will see my response. But if you do. I want you to know reading your words made me hurt inside.
I hurt because someone abused their authority, responsibility and the blind trust of a child.
Most of all I hurt because someone hurt you and that should have never happened.
I am the father of two wonderful 9 year old girls. I am beginning to suspect they could be experiencing something similar when they visit their mother.
I am just a stupid Dad who knows nothing about nothing (or so I'm told). One thing I do know, I love my children and I don't want them (or anyone for that matter) to ever imagine feelings like those mentioned in your poem.
Thank you for sharing your feelings for us stupid Dads to read.
You should be about 20 years old now. I pray, such feelings are no longer in your life. I hope you are happy and have found people who give you honest love. Lastly, I pray the situation was dealt with as our laws require. We don't need people like that.

  • by Christina, USA
  • 6 years ago

I'm so sorry that this horrible nightmare happened to you, as well as everyone on here. No one can really understand what you or are going through. But, I do. I was molested by my biological father, whom I NEVER wanted to meet. I finally met him for the first time (when I was 13) I am 21 now. He molested me when I was 14 and 15. I recently told my mom about a week ago that the accusations that were made were true. It took me this long not to deny it anymore. It's something I have to live with everyday of my life. My question is? Can I still prosecute him, even if it's been 8 years ago?

  • by Gabriella, Surrey
  • 6 years ago

This really touched me, I'm only fourteen but OMG this is just amazing and your so special and I used to cut but I've managed to stop, my stepdad was abusive towards me and he often comes back but I know I'm not alone and I think your poem is wonderful <3
Wherever you are, I hope your safe and I wish you the best!
Merry Christmas! :D

  • by Cherie, Bay Area
  • 6 years ago

My dearest children of God. As child I was bitten and throw into the dark and wet basement all night until the next day. As child I was so in love with the siren of the train. When I was in basement, I used to hear the siren of the train, and I used to catch the train and travel at faster than speed, I used to travel all over the world inside my mind, until the morning. I have been raped over and over. But one think I learned that is problems are guide post not stop sign, and the best way to cope is to be surrounded with people who love you, and stay away from all those people who hurt you. I am so sorry for all those pain and suffering and lots we all went through but you remember that winner never lose and loser never wine.

  • by Melissa, Chester
  • 6 years ago

Thank you for writing this. It makes me feel like someone understands what happened to me. For me it was my father and sometimes, my mother. It's nice to not feel alone.

  • by Meagan, USA
  • 6 years ago

This poem was incredible and heart wrenching. I too suffered from sexual abuse. I endure it everyday for two and a half years and the worse part is a lot of people knew about it because it was all during school. I cope by cutting and think I am worthless. I hate myself and the world around me.

  • by Jo, USA
  • 7 years ago

This poem really helped me, I'm in the same boat. it started when I was 3 my mom met him and ruined my life. I never told, but my mom finally left him when I was 14, 10 years of abuse and when we left I missed him. so I went to his house after school and life was ok again but I still hated myself. Then my mom said no more and the court said you can't see him because he hits me sometimes when he is mad. But if I just learn to be better it will be ok. When I was 15 my mom dropped the restraining order and now at 18, I still see him once or twice every week its hard because he remarried if I just did things better he wouldn't need someone else to take care of him he would only need me. I miss him and I hate me.

  • by N''tasha Cook
  • 7 years ago

I am only 13 years old and when I was 8 my so called uncle (really friend to the family) used to pick me up from school... Bathe me, do his disgusting deeds then told me to take a shower once more! This was regular till I turned 10. When my real aunt noticed that I started becoming a sad child....why? Because I kept hearing about this topic at school and how it was bad! With this I was ashamed but after when I heard about death I decided it was time for me to spill! And I did but to this day the man that put me in depression is still alive and living in his house! Not a day goes by that I don't see his face and wonder...I swear some days I feel like I wanna go on the insanity team but writing poetry helps but not all the way cause I still have thoughts I need to tell someone but trust isn't in my vocabulary. Maybe....one day......

  • by Lin, Carson
  • 7 years ago

She wasn't being abused. She still is! Where is she supposed to turn? SHE ALREADY SAID SHE CAN NOT GO TO THE POLICE. SHE CANNOT GO TO HER MOM. Where? I was abused by half of my bio sperms family. Where can she go? And do not go with anyone from the internet!!!! National Hotlines; 1-800-4-A-CHILD & 1-800-799-7233. numbers you can trust. Tell them you cannot trust your mom or the police. Tell them everything!!! PLEASE!! Please let us know if you get help!!??

  • by Cae
  • 7 years ago

I understand the your pain, your loneliness, feeling of abandonment. I am 50 years old, incest survivor. I was raped, beaten, degraded, belittled for over 12 years straight, by my father from the ages 4-16, and my mother knew and did nothing. Pregnant at 12, yes by my father, my mother took me to San Francisco to terminate the pregnancy. She made me lie about the father.. told me If I told the truth they would take us away (my 2 sisters and brother and myself) I didn't know what that meant but I could tell by my mothers behavior it wasn't good. So I had to lie and say it was a boy friends. Ironic.. I wasn't even allowed to have friends. I lived in hell, night after night. Day after day. Week after week. Month after month. Year after year. Begging god to make him stop, make him go away..to please, take me to heaven, let me die. Anything, anything but this.
12 yrs, God never answered.. I am 50, and my family has abandoned me because I haven't been able to forget and move on.

  • by Maria, Anaheim
  • 7 years ago

I feel the same way too. I was sexually abused once when I was five and the other time was when I was 14 1/2, they were two different guys. When I was five it was a guy who we used to live with at my godmother's house, and he asked me if I wanted ice cream, I said "what flavors do you have?" And he said "any flavor you like!" I yelled with excitement "Vanilla!" he took me to his room and closed the door, I didn't know any better so I just went with the flow. I sat down on his bed and he raised my dress, I heard a zipper, since my dress on one side was transparent and I saw his pull his pants down. I closed my eyes when he put my dress how it was and he said to open my mouth, for being stupid I did, and I gave him a blowjob, until someone knocked on the door, thank God it was my mom. My mom asked for me and he said that I wasn't there, because he told me to hide. But I didn't want to anymore. So I just jumped out and rushed out the door when my mom was about to close it.

  • by Amanda, 18
  • 7 years ago

I know exactly how you're feeling, or felt. I was sexually abused from 13 years old till 17 when I completely left my life at home. My uncle was the bastard who fucked my whole life up. I was still young only just got into 9th grade. And it wasn't just one time. I couldn't even tell you how many times it occurred. Whenever my parents would leave or go to sleep he'd be there waiting. He lived with me till I was 16 and almost everyday it was occurring. I had lost my virginity at 13, and it was as soon as he found out that it began. I was a dumb kid, but I never in a million years wanted him to do those things to me. I'm living in my own apartment now never graduated, because from 13 to 16 I honestly never went to school I skipped about everyday and when I was there I'd sleep. I could never pay attention. Even now even though it hasn't happened recently it kills me everyday I tried so hard to tell my parents without telling them. I remember the 1st time he touched me, like he just touched didn't go more than that, I was in his room drinking beers because I could and my friend was over and he felt me up when my friend left the room, I ran out and cried. I even told her. Not even a week later is when he destroyed my life forever. His face haunts me everyday, every night, and no matter what I do I can't forget, and I can't get over it. It's like drilled in my head I just get flashbacks and get angry now , and I get mad and take it out on people I care about . I feel so fucked up in the head. like no one can help me. I am taking bipolar meds now and anxiety pills for the past 3 years. It can't take this pain away, nothing can. I feel useless and used, and I just wish I could have done something different, or maybe even kept proof of what he did instead of showering trying to scrub the dirty prick off and out of me. I was 15 and I became pregnant. I thought it was with my boyfriend at the time who was 24 but he went to the doctor it turned out he can't have kids, and he was born that way ..so what does this tell you? How do you think I feel knowing that it was my uncles. I took a lot of drugs ended up having a miscarriage and I never went to hospital. I think about it everyday. Like what could I have done so wrong at 13, to deserve it? Repeatedly he would do it for years. and he gets to walk away and act like it never happened and enjoy his life while I'm stuck here everyday wishing I'd die. I feel dead. I wish I was. I really do. I try everyday to move ahead and I just can't. I fell to far back. I don't know but I never told on him to my parents, or police. If I did it would ruin my family and I already lost enough. I'm done writing I just needed to vent. Thank you.

  • by Chrystal, Chicago
  • 7 years ago

I'm SO VERY SORRY about what you're suffering through, honey...I was physically & sexually abused from the time I was 2...it went on for almost 15 years. I can't remember the number of times social workers & police officers were at my home, poking around and asking questions, only to be convinced that there was NOTHING GOING ON. It's a very long road you have in front of you, but keep your head up and NEVER STOP telling your story. Blessings to you, honey!

  • by Katherine
  • 7 years ago

I understand your pain I was molested by my brother for a couple of years and I pushed it out of my mind. When he died 3 years ago I was 12. I had a boyfriend who wanted in my pants and I kept telling him NO! Well after I remember all of the stuff about my bro it was a month after he died and I was getting high and drunk at party (I didn't cut myself yet). I got an abortion 3 weeks later I started seeing things, weird things, and I lost control everytime I wasn't around an adult. I started cutting at parties drop ALL my old friends got involved in a gang (not IN in it just hung out in) and I got into drugs even worse I was a whore. I'll admit it but I'm doing better now and you are strong I might only be 15 but I can feel your pain just as much I'm sure as you can feel mine, but I gave up, hope you didn't and for that you have MY RESPECT.

  • by Destiny Baynham
  • 7 years ago

When I was nine I was sexually abused by my step dad it went on for about 6 years..the only person that knew about it was my diary and god..a couple of day ago I was over my friend house and my mom called me up crying. she told me that she was looking in my diary and found something very disturbing about what I wrote in it about my step dad (him molesting me). I was silent, my heart started to race then I began to cry..after 5 years of keeping this secret.. the truth is finally out..tearsss..I know your pain I felt the exact same way..and I kind of still do. I feel like committing suicide!!

  • by Neveah
  • 7 years ago

Honey, I know how you feel, my older cousin did that to me, molest and beat me. He would always be the one to offer to babysit me.....so many times. I got pregnant by him when I was 15.... I lied to my parents and told them it happened at some party.....they kicked me out....he never did do anything about it....I don't even talk to my family anymore. I tried to talk to my mom but she said she could never forgive a little whore like me....I'm 17 now and I've been living with my friends. The little girl is 2 and I love her but she looks so much like him it's so hard!!!!

  • by Lisa Louise Lee
  • 7 years ago

I know how it feels to be touched and sexually abused. My dad used to sexually me too. One night I was in bed and I heard the floor boards creek he was getting close and closer towards my bedroom door I start to hide under my covers. He was drunk sometimes I can hear him calling my name while stumbling around the house. He used to grab me -- He was hurting me so bad but would not let me go.
I can still feel him touching me, grabbing me, Forcing my body closer to his The feeling of his cold fingers all over my body it has stopped now I was adopted when I was seven years old. I am 15 now.

  • by Julie, Minnesota
  • 7 years ago

I was sexually abused by my brother and physically abused by my mom it happened when I was like 6 and 7 maybe 8 I can't remember that well (not that I would want to) I'm 13 now and it hurts me to think about it. I cut myself sometimes and I have wanted to commit suicide :( I know how you feel I've only told three people about it and one of them says I should tell the cops...but that would totally destroy my whole family I don't know what to do. I'm scared :(

  • by Elicia Rojas
  • 1 year ago

I don't know if you have or haven't told the cops, but in case you haven't you really need to because by you not telling, you're continuing to give him what he wants as long as nobody knows. He is in the safe zone and hasn't done anything, but you know the truth, and if he touches you he is bound to touch another innocent girl. :(

  • by Kayla
  • 7 years ago

I know how this feels I understand. It's so painful and lonesome in that world. I'm fourteen my dad started molesting me at 3 I told when I was 12 & got out but a lot of that side of the family doesn't talk to me and it hurts. I have 2 little brothers who still live with him and my step-mom. when I told she said to me "Kayla I think you're watching too much lifetime" then smacked me. It went to the police, what he did, but he didn't go to jail cuz they said there wasn't enough evidence. Since the day I told I have nightmares that he is going to kill me. I'm hurting till this day and I know it'll never go away.

  • by Areli
  • 7 years ago

My daughters have been through sexual, physical, mental abuse by their father, luckily they came to me and I helped them, now he's in prison serving time for what he has done to them, I think anyone who has the courage to tell is a hero because when you speak up you're saving someone else from the pain that person could cause them, it's not easy getting over it but patients and love is a must, know its been 3 years since he was put away and he's serving 13 years, and my daughters are now starting to manage the pain, and move forward. Sorry that your mother is of no help to you in these most critical years for you, but I think you and your mother should get some help real soon, yourself for the abuse and your mother for low self esteem.

  • by Carol, Michigan
  • 7 years ago

Dear victim posters, can you imagine if everyone who has suffered sexual abuse could stand in one place and all cry out at the same time? Cry out for anger, pain and the need to GET OUR LIFE BACK. I was amazed in reading through the reply's how many people can openly discuss their experiences yet society seems to do nothing. How can this go on? Why does it still go on? We need to protect our children from the incredible amount of pedophiles that prey on innocence and completely ruin lives for their own sexual pleasure. Deep sickening selfishness. I want to do something, strength comes in numbers. Please attend all advocating events that you can find in your area to stick up for others. Nothing will change, if we don't move beyond the posts. Carol age 33, victim of multiple sexual child abuse.

  • by Abbie
  • 7 years ago

I'm so sorry this happened to you. I have not been sexually abused, though I have been sexually harassed and assaulted by a boy at my school. No one tried to help me on the bus. The driver saw it and didn't do anything about it. I tried to tell people.. I tried to tell my parents, then one day he did something so horrible I went home in so many tears, my mom and dad finally listened, and went into my school. this occurred very recently, and he's still suspended.. but I know what it feels like to be afraid of what might happen after a case is finished, though mine is not as severe, I know some of the suspense you're feeling. I just hope that know one else has to go through what you have been through or what I have been through. you are in my prayer. god bless you and the ones who you love, love you and have listened to you.

  • by Travianna, Michigan
  • 7 years ago

I trusted you. You where suppose to be my dad . I loved you, but now I'm just afraid. I didn't come near you again. I didn't want to speak to anyone. I was depressed for 2 months. And now you stand in front of me and tell me you're sorry for messing up my life. You're sorry for splitting up me and my brother, your sorry for us being in foster care and moving for home to home. Well, I'm standing up and saying that your apology means nothing to me and that I'm free from you, now you're finally out of my life for good!

  • by Scared And Alone
  • 7 years ago

I know how you feel I was raped and beaten at the age of three to the age of 12 I got prego by him and then had a miscarriage at six mouths my mom and family don't believe me. It was my uncle I still have nightmares and I'm 15 and last week I went to court because I stabbed someone that tried to do it again I was soooooo scared but I'm trying to be strong it's not really working I'm doing drugs and drinking I'm trying to stop. You are helping me be strong thank you lot of love keep sharing your story for people like me

  • by Grace
  • 7 years ago

after reading this poem it brings so many memories rushing back. I'm 28 years old never had a childhood growing up. you see my step dad raped and beat me and my siblings for years. my mother would stand by and watch and soon enough she joined in on the beating. I tried to protect my siblings when I could even though I was the middle child I was the strongest. we were taking away three times but my mom could lie her way out of anything so we were given right back and beaten because we open are mouth then locked in a closet for a couple of days till we said we were sorry. really the only reason we said we were sorry is because we were hungry. when I was 16 my stepdad was arrested for 34 counts of 1st, 2nd and 3rd degree of csc (Criminal Sexual Conduct) but he took a plea bargain and got five years and my mother walked. but we all up and moved away and each of us has learned how to cope with it somehow. I'm now married and have custody of my little brother so I've learned to bury it.

  • by Danielle22
  • 7 years ago

I understand where your coming from I was sexually abused at the ages of 8-16 by my dad ( who also sexually abused my cousins, 3 of them and my aunt). He started off just making me touch him then he started touching me, then the older I got the worst things got. I kind of blocked things out my mind for years but now I'm 23 and have a 2 year old daughter and every thing seem to come back to me. I hate him and will never trust him around my child. As far as my mom goes she caught him on top of me rubbing his ( you no what) against my ( you no what) When I was about 8 years old AND DID NOTHING. To this day they're still together. I'm still kind of messed up in the head a lil but I will tell you, I will kill before I let it happen to my baby. Sweetie you have to be strong and he will get what's coming to him believe in god.

  • by Jen, California
  • 7 years ago

I was abused twice growing up once when I was 6 yrs old by my male babysitter. I never said anything until I was about 9 and no one believed me. Then my step brother started abusing me daily and remember how it was until I was 15 yrs old and I finally spoke. My father looked me in the eyes and said he didn't believe me and I was kicked out of my house. I was forced to go live with a mother I never knew in California. To see this monster being a part of my family still accepted and loved and me I was discarded like yesterdays trash hurt far more. I am 30 now and I still live in the shame of it. No matter what people say I still feel it was my fault

  • by Jade, England
  • 7 years ago

I know exactly where your coming from I was sexually abused when I was a little girl I am also 17. I haven't told anyone except my partner who had a right to know. He only know I was abused he doesn't know the whole story. I don't feel I am strong enough or able to tell him or anyone what happened I suppose it's scary. It's really hard going through this on my own so I can relate when you had to do it just remember there are people that have been through the same thing. You're not on your own!! X

  • by Alma, South Philadelphia
  • 7 years ago

I feel your pain... I went through something very similar, it was my own father and his friends who did it, my mother had to go to work one night and my fathers friends came over I went upstairs but they got drunk and came after me and... it went on 12 years, anytime my mother left the house I haven't told my mother...or anyone else for that matter. the man moved away 4 years ago, and that was the brightest day I've had since everything began, anyway, I FEEL YOUR PAIN...people care about you trust me!!!

  • by Danielle
  • 7 years ago

My god that was heartbreaking to read. I know how you feel though. I'm 32 and my sister 39 and we are just now getting the courage to take him to court. My mom took his side as well as my brothers....it hurts but if he's locked up, he will never hurt anyone ever again. Stay strong sweet girl...tell someone...there are ways to get out. Your poem touched me and changed me. I am sharing it with my friends on fb..so it can touch more lives. Hugs sweetheart!!

  • by Aisha
  • 7 years ago

Wow I was sexually abused but it was so hard to tell anyone or trust anyone at first, but then I had the courage and told someone that was very close to me for years. I finally told that person and she have helped me since then. Still till this day, I have to go to counseling because I have so many memories in my head and I am only 13 years old. I feel like nothing is going to end ever..

  • by Crystal, Heflin Al
  • 7 years ago

I know what you are going through I am 25 years old and I was molested from the ages of 9-13 and it's still hard for me because unlike you I wasn't strong enough to go to the police and he is still out there and I am scared sometimes that he might find me... I still have a very hard time with it. I still haven't gotten over the fact that he done that to me and he did it to my sister and brother only once but I feel like its my fault that it happened to them. I try to keep a diary and everything but it's hard for me to do sometimes, see I am a mother of 2 kids and in the back of my mind I am scared its going to happen to them, but right now I am in therapy and it seems to help just as long as I am on my meds.. but you are a lot stronger then me and I know you will make it through this... Just keep your head up..

  • by Pauline, Canada
  • 7 years ago

I've been there to, by my father when I was 6 to 8 its hard to go though your poems made me cry and remember it all and I live everyday scared for my daughter and hoping they never go though it. It's a horrible thing to go though and hard to get over...

  • by Antrim
  • 7 years ago

I know just how you feel my grandad sexually abused me when I was 10 until I was 16 and when I told what was happening when I was 15 no one believed me. My dad beat me bad and said I was lying. So it went on until I was 16 until I got to old for him then it stopped. I'm 24 now and I have two kids of my own but I've been to counseling and my head is a mess I never told the police because my family told me they would never speak to me again and when I had my daughter I had a lot of flashbacks and was going to go to the police but he told me he would hurt my daughter if I did. He still lives with my granny and the family still doesn't believe me. You will find someone that will believe you. I found my boyfriend and he's very understanding of it all and stuck by me all these years even with everything I've put him through xxxx

  • by Pennsylvania
  • 7 years ago

I understand how this makes you feel, as I've been there. When you move out and on with your life seek good friends and counseling, or you'll probably end up unhappy in every relationship. Trust me it's important to realize you are more than what they've made you feel like! Stop the cycle!

  • by Shirley
  • 7 years ago

I don't know how so many sick people out there can do this to children! I wasn't abused but my mom was when she was 6 by her older brother, she says that she thinks that her sister was abused as well but doesn't know for sure since she doesn't admit it when asked. He is still out there in New York I believe, I hate him so much for what he did and wish I could make him pay, who knows maybe he still does this, I wish I knew where he was so I could spy on him and make him pay! Much love to all of the victims out there, I know its hard but keep on going there is always an end to this and I hope to never experience this since I'm still a teen. Many prayers for the author of the poem above, stay strong! God Bless you!

  • by Ashley
  • 7 years ago

Similar thing happened to me, the police didn't believe me so I said I was lying, in the end I ended up telling everyone that what he did was true. Keep your head up high because one thing it'll start getting better, one day you'll find friends that will accept your bad days just like your good days.

  • by Jassica, Illinois
  • 7 years ago

What's scary is how one can be so pure and try to confess the truth but no one chooses to hear you. Well I do and my biological father is a convicted pedophile he's been out of my life since I was 7 years old. He sexually molested my older sister which is now 23 and I'm 15. I've lost most of my memory because of this. My mom got remarried to an actual man when my father was sent to prison but now he's out and lives less than a mile away. Lucky for my sister she has nothing to worry for but he knows exactly where I live. I've tried to tell my mother but she refuses to listen I know your pain I've felt it for years, but you can get emancipated and live your life the way you want and not have to worry about him. I have to live with my mother because she's not well and I promised her I wouldn't leave her by herself, but stay strong. This poem cut me deep and I've got to tell a speech about it for my English class this following Tuesday thank you finally I'm not alone

  • by Mariah
  • 8 years ago

Your poems is devastating, and unimaginable, I am 13 and when I was about 7 or 8, I'm not really sure, I slept at my grandfathers house for the night I had always loved going there, but that night I watched a scary movie and sorta freaked, so as I did with my parents I ran into his bed with him, I didn't know he was naked plus I didn't think I was really that bother with it then cause I had loved him so much and never thought he would do anything bad, this is the part I get confused with, I'm not entirely sure what molesting is, so I don't know if thats what he did but he touched my privates that entire night, I remember being very uncomfortable with it and trying to move away but I couldn't. I have not told anyone because he never mentioned it ever, I haven't told my family because it would tear my mother apart, he's her only family plus it happened so long ago, I will never trust him and hate being alone with him and even when he touches my arm or anywhere I feel dirty I'm so sorry

  • by Summer Chase Alone
  • 8 years ago

I was raped 6 years ago and I have flash backs and I almost killed myself today, I wrote a suicide note to my best friend and he stopped me and he told me every thing will be ok. All I wanted was someone to hold me and say its ok. I'm 17 and I'm still going thru a lot and I don't know what to do, this poem gave me an answer (tell someone what I feel)

  • by Wendy
  • 8 years ago

Unfortunately there are a lot more children & adults who have suffered this way. Your story sounds all to familiar except mine was my own dad. Don't ever give up and KNOW you are better than this and deserve soooo much more. You are old enough to be emancipated. I was. Take charge of your life and be happy. And GOOD LUCK - I am so sorry you are living this.

  • by Stephanie
  • 8 years ago

I kind of know how you feel, I have been physically abused by my dad for years, it started when I was 5 and I am now 16. but thankfully right now me and my mom are working on getting me out of that house, I just want to say that there is ALWAYS HOPE! but don't run away, trust me, that's not a good idea. just hang in there a little bit longer! I will pray for you to be safe and for God to keep that 'man' away from you.

  • by Patricia, Grande Prairie AB
  • 8 years ago

This has happened to me on various occasions with my dad, uncle, grandfather...never told anyone...as I got older went from man to man not ever happy...finally went to hypnosis counseling it was the best 500 dollars spent...I have been with the same guy for two years and love him very much. There is a light, Pray to God, he is there but still get the counseling you so much need... let it out and let the professional help you...there is free counseling available...rape is a vicious cycle it has to be stopped...God will make them pay each one of them has died a painful death...The sad thing is they were molested when they were little...stop the cycle! Believe in our children

  • by Gabrielle
  • 8 years ago

I have been raped in my childhood the first time I was molested was when I was 3, it was by my moms husband no one suspected the sexual and physical abuse. I told my mom and she left her husband. My mom has always all my life been trying to find me a man to be my dad I have had some good ones and some bad one, but what's weird is that they were all good at first then we would meet the real them the last time I was raped was when I was 15, it was by my mom's boyfriend he was also my baby brother Michael's dad (r.i.p. baby boy) I had gotten pregnant I don't want to talk about the baby but I know how you feel because this time my mom didn't believe me. I like to believe the only reason she didn't believe me is because of the drugs she was on at the time made her forget the last time he raped me was march 2008 that night I slept in the bed with my mom something I never do and the next I called social services.

  • by Xena
  • 8 years ago

I cant believe your own mother would say something like that. I've never experienced anything like this but reading this poem really made me want to cry. I pictured very clearly. That is one touching poem. I felt like I was in your shoes but obviously I wasn't. You are so strong to face have faced that. And I feel deeply for you. :)

  • by Keri
  • 8 years ago

Ohh am so sorry darling. Touched me when I was reading it because I was sexually abused by my grandad at 11 yrs old and stopped when I was 15 but only told my parents in Jan 2010.. and police are now involved.. very scared to go court.. I also feel alone.. not got no-one to talk to.. no-one understands how I feel.. and all I got off my boyfriend was "Get over it". :/.
I got called an attention seeker.. because I started to cut my left arm quiet a lot.. but I was just crying out for help.. but in the end I told my mum. You are a very brave girl and am pleased you told someone. Looking up to you, this poem means a lot! Hope these people who ever been abused open up and tell the police and do something about it.. because the more you keep it to yourself, the more it eats away at you. <3 xoxox Hope you are getting better.

  • by Chesla Brown, GA
  • 8 years ago

I have been in your shoes! There are lots of girls who go through the same thing you are dealing with! Eventually things will be alright, Just be happy that you were BRAVE enough to tell someone, I wasn't that brave! My best friend had to tell someone for me because I was to scared to speak up. I let a lot of people get hurt because I didn't speak up! Just be proud of yourself for standing up for yourself! No matter how long it took you to speak up, You still did it. A lot of girls would love to be as brave as you are! Many people will read this poem and look up to you! You are teaching people that's it's alright to speak up for themselves! Congrats on being so brave! And thank you for posting this amazing poem for the world to read!

  • by Bella, Geelong Australia
  • 8 years ago

I loved this poem it's so true, but what do you do when the person who raped you for years still lives with you and is your brother. When he made you do things with him that are horrible. I can't tell my mum that my brother did that. What would happen to my family? I want to tell her but I can't. He hasn't done it in 8 months but I'm scared he will. I don't want it to happen again. Why can't it just not have happened? I want to be the same little girl I once was.

  • by Terilynn
  • 8 years ago

This story bothered me because the same thing happened to my daughter she was molested and raped 12 years by my husband and all he got was a slap on the wrist and her and I were left destitute. But today we are no longer victims but survivors. I can assure you my daughter and I have gone through all that pain. And there was not a time I didn't believe her, but there was a time he manipulated me into believing he was sick and needed help. There are no cures for molesters and rapist. there is no reform. They are what they are and they never stop. He only got 6 months of jail time on a 99 year sentence. But I know someday he will re-offend and he won't get another chance!

  • by Mrs. Shah, Asia
  • 8 years ago

I really appreciate Louise for her courage, hoping she would be a pioneer to raise voice against all these predators. I was shocked to read and by the number of stories in comments. just imagine if All these Ladies would be courageous enough not to hide this abuse, then the day is not far when these sick predators will find no place to hide there ugly faces.
May GOD be with all of you and ease your pain.

  • by Tina, WI
  • 8 years ago

When I turned 17 I moved to upstate WI. and ran into my most loved and favorite uncle in the whole world. I remember him as a kid he meant so much to me! Well when we were reconnected years later,we went to the bar I worked at and had a couple cocktails. Well at some point that night he slipped 3 zanex in to my drink and I got very sleepy. He offered to drive me to his house and let me sleep it off, I never thought twice about going to his house not once. When we got there I was beaten and raped, afterwards I was drugged and he dropped me off 3 miles out of town on a country road, I ran nonstop all the way home. I came into my moms home balling and told her what happened. Turns out I was his 3rd victim. The 1st girl was in a coma for 3 months, the 2nd was beaten worse then me. he got months in jail with huber (Work Release) tell me how that works? I am here to support you and wish you nothing but peace and happiness!

  • by Betty, Columbus OH
  • 8 years ago

I have never been abused but I have worked with girls and ladies who have been abused and there is away out even for you. Never ever give up hope. Giving up gives him permission to take total control of your life. He is holding you hostage, body, mind, soul and spirit. Where there is life, there is hope. You are important. It is not your fault. Soul ties can be broken, forgiveness can take place and God can heal you. Talk to someone who can take you through the forgiveness process. Also, forgive yourself even though it is NOT your fault. Forgiving yourself stops the root of bitterness from forming in you heart against him, your mother and many others in the future. Forgiveness is healing. Resort to your gifts and talents and move forward. You are special and some day you will be able to help someone else. God Bless

  • by Lauras Little Sister
  • 8 years ago

It happened to my sister I never understood because we had such different lives, she is 50 years old now and I still hear her pain, I've always been there for her -to listen, my dad didn't believe her either and 10 years later the man abusing her was put in jail for molesting his daughters soccer team, my sister got justice but it changed her- her soul forever, she'll never be a complete person, I'm sorry for you, don't back down your mom will regret not standing by your side, be patient. I lost my 16 year old Amanda - I'll never be a whole person again either...

  • by Laura, Chicago Illinois
  • 8 years ago

Wow this really sounds like my story. I was sexually molested for two years by my grandfather. That was when I was 7-9 years old. I am now approaching my 18 birthdays and I still have nightmares about it. That side of the my family (my dads) don't believe me at all. It hurts really bad when people you thought loved you brings you so much hurt and pain. So I completely understand how you are feeling. You are not alone and I want to extend my hand out to you. We are rape survivors and that's what we have to keep in mind to keep moving. And if you have friends let them be your source of comfort . And if not God is always there. Thank you for sharing your story.

  • by Brenda, North Carolina
  • 8 years ago

This really touched my heart because it hit home. I was not molested but our 2 year old great niece was. When she was 3 she told me her daddy (stepfather) hurt her in her privates. Amy has been with us most of her life, her mother worked odd hrs and so we raised her. Her mother married this man when Amy was just a baby (not her real father, he has nothing to do with her). There were times when he was with her alone. I told my sister because she was keeping Amy the next day. My sister called me crying, Amy had told her that her daddy put his privates in her mouth. We then called the law, and social services got involved. We gained temporary custody, but one day the Dept of SS came and took her away to give her to her real father, a man that hadn't seen her in over 2 years, a total stranger. They took her out of our home kicking and screaming, please don't let them take me Aunt Brenna. I will never forget that day. Now he won't let any of us c her. It is so heartbreaking.

  • by Carla Peters
  • 8 years ago

I am sorry that you are going through this alone not much different from you. I am 26, from the time I was 6 years old until 9 when my parents divorced my brother was 8 years older than me would come into my room and make me watch porno movies and play the scene. I never told no one about it except my best friend. When I was 13 I told my mom when it was going on, all she had to say was don't tell your dad and at 6-7 years old I thought ok don't tell dad. My brother was my half brother he was not my dads kid. I finally told my dad at 17 and then my brother heard that I had told and he called one night he told me he was sorry for what he did and ruining my childhood I acted like I couldn't hear him and told him I had to switch phones I had my dad pick up the other phone and just listen my brother repeated himself and my dad threatened to kill him. I haven't talked to my brother in a really long time he is in prison now for shooting his wife guess what goes around comes around he'll pay one way or another. Stay strong.

  • by Twice South Africa
  • 8 years ago

It really pained me to see this poem, it hurts to see many ladies & young girls being victims of such cruel people. My sister was raped in 2007 together with her friend, they were virgins. It hurt me so much, I cried so much when I was told, she was hurting, she attended counseling but it was not helping, she would just take off to her friends without telling anyone & come back late at night, then the counselor said she was trying to claim back her life, sometimes it would be too bad, I remember my aunt telling her that she wanted it, I was so hurt. Thanks be to God because she is becoming better by the day, I remember when she went to varsity, my aunts were saying bad stuff like she won't make it there, she will have boys & fall pregnant but she passed everything.

My dear you wonderfully made, writing this poem is a shout out, tell your story never stop even if your mom doesn't believe you, I pray that you heal & there is a way through GOD!

  • by Tracey, South Africa
  • 8 years ago

My heart broke into a million pieces reading this poem. How can any mother turn against her own flesh and blood. I was never abused, except for 1 time my brother pulled me towards him and it was horrifying. I can't imagine being abused for such a long time. My heart goes out to you and every other child being abused and I remember you in my prayers!

  • by Amber, Texas
  • 8 years ago

I read this poem and I knew exactly what she is going through. From the age of 6 I was molested by my mom's various boyfriends for 4 years. Then when I was 13 my brother molested me. The last straw was when I was raped by my mom's boyfriend when I was 17 and became pregnant. I gave birth to a beautiful baby girl and gave her up for adoption. She was later killed in a car accident. I was and even still am hated by my mother. I lived in various friends houses for 2 years because I did not want to go home. It is a hard thing to go through especially at such a young age, but I am here to tell you it does get better. I am now 20. I have gone through all of that, I was suicidal, and fought many addictions and STD's from the various men who molested me. I am now a sophomore in a junior college and will be transferring to medical school in about 2 years. I couldn't be happier with my life, and in the end all of the mishaps that have happened just make us stronger.

  • by Tisha, New Mexico
  • 8 years ago

This story really touch my heart and I know what it's like to go through that I been there myself.... but the only people that believed in me was my best friend and to this day she is still at my side and as my life went on my family started to notice what happened and he did it again to my other sisters. So you're not alone

  • by Gardenia, Los Angeles
  • 8 years ago

Hey there....I know exactly how you are feeling right now, I was raped at the age of 6 by my so called best friend's brother and I felt gross and dirty and I never told anyone about it because I was afraid that they were not going to believe me. I didn't even tell my mom, and she passed way 4 years ago and I regret it a lot. I have told some of my friends and they cant believe that would happen but it did. I am so proud of you because you had the strength to go to the police and tell them what happened and I didn't and up to this day I wonder what would have happened if I would have said something. I am 18 now and I still carry the memory with me but I NEVER let it get the best of me, because life goes on and there's worst shit that happens out there that we are not even aware of. My point is that many girls go through this and don't reporte and YOU did! That makes you a strong young lady!

  • by Maryann, Brunswick
  • 8 years ago

I was also molested, but I had to forgive, or else I would continuously be tortured. I still have flashbacks, but have to force them out of my head, in order to stay focused on what's ahead. I will always listen to my kids, if they tell me someone has hurt them. It's very rare that a child would ever make this up. Very very rare. So, please don't hurt your child by taking a molester's side. You will have damaged them further. God be with us all.

  • by Me, Washington
  • 8 years ago

WOW what a Poem! You tugged on my heart strings and then I read ALL the comments and now they are torn. I am a survivor of my step-grandfather who murdered his wife and got away with it. Then he lived with us for 4 years. You can see now why I believed his threats and to this day have not opened up. My Mom knows and blames herself for not protecting me but I love her dearly and never blamed her. But no one knows the details but me. I am very sad to see this many girls being abused, I can only imagine how many are REALLY out there. I thought this didn't happen to everyone else.

TO ALL SURVIVORS ~ You are all strong and beautiful. For those who say you never told anyone, you just did. It is the easy form of letting some of it go and a little glimmer of hope that someone will see this, find you and save you. I know I am doing the same thing.

I wish all the best for all of you, we can ALL make it through this. I love you all

  • by Cheryl Bianchi, Brisbane Australia
  • 8 years ago

My poor sweet girl. You are beautiful. The offender and your mother are the evil ones here. Please learn to love and forgive yourself. It can be done. I have done it. My Mum to did not believe me but I was there for her always. I regret she never said she was sorry to me but on her last days she reached out and told me she was so lucky to have had me in her life. To me that was her sorry. That healed me. The presence of the offender was not wanted to be seen by her when her time was close and that says she believed me. Please take care of the special girl that you are as one day you will have your children and you will be a good Mum to them and know what real love it.

  • by Sherri Wipperman
  • 8 years ago

All I can say is how very sorry I am for your pain...and all those you touched. Your healing will come with time. Do not think that you are not loved, and do not think that what they have done to you is real love. Real love is patient, kind, not selfish, not abusive. We humans have but a taste of the fullness of real love. I pray you and others find that internal peace and work through the horrors you have been through and help others. Sad to say, there will be others.

  • by Anastasia Moser
  • 8 years ago

OMG, all of you who have been sexually abused I am sooo so sorry for you! I started crying reading this poem ! and your stories,
I wasn't sexually abused, but I was abused when a little girl in Ukraine. I didn't have the courage to tell anyone either because I was so little, I was at the age of 3 4 and 5 and my parents sometimes wished I was never born and they abandoned me a lot of times in the streets, leaving me to survive all on my own in the cold nights of the dirty streets. I rather be out there instead of with them though. well I didn't tell anyone because all I was seeking was love from my parents, and even though they hit me at times I forgave them and I showed them love for that's what I wanted back from them !! that's the only thing I was seeking, love from my parents!

  • by Abby, Arkansas
  • 8 years ago

I think you are so brave. I truly look up to you. I am 15 right now. I was abused by my step dad when I was 7 and again when I was 9. I think you have a lot of courage. I have told no one in my family. My mom is still with him. I used to cut. My mom found out and made me promise not to do it again...I haven't done it since. I know I will never tell my mom. I can't bear it if she doesn't believe me or worse...blames me. This poem sort of fed the fear. I have told a couple of my friends. They just don't get it. They look at me with blank stares or just look at me like I'm crazy. Everyday I always wake up and think 3 more years., 3 more years until I'm 18. I feel ashamed and I know that I will have to carry this burden for the rest of my life. I have thought about the car suicide more than I would like to admit. I wish I had the courage to tell my family like you told your mom.

  • by Mechelle White
  • 8 years ago

I too was raped and molested, spent most of my life angry and bitter, full of sadness and feeling very lonely, I am in my middle forties and I have learned to forgive and move on but it's been a long hard road especially when most of my family wouldn't believe me or even help me, but I trust in God, and he has given me hope and peace. So please never give up let it make you a stronger person and make life worth living and help someone else when you can.
I am here to help in anyway I can. My name is Shelly.

  • by Crying
  • 8 years ago

I sat here reading all of these comments and it makes me wanna barf and cry for eternity just to know what happened to all of these girls in this message board that have suffered this horrible pain and it scares me to know how vicious and sick these men are and now I feel like a can't trust any men and I glare at any man that stares at me.

  • by Bella, Geelong Australia
  • 8 years ago

I know how you feel, I told my friends and I cry a lot of the time, they got so sick of it and told me to just get over it. Then when I couldn't, well lets just say I don't have friends any more, It was my brother I was so little when it started I didn't know it was wrong but I knew it was at the same time. Then as I got older he did it more and more he hasn't done it for 6 mouths now but I'm scared he will. I know how you feel. Our stories might be different and I hope you're ok. I know I'm not. No one in my family knows about it and every one who does know, they just don't understand

  • by Kirstin Gates
  • 8 years ago

Wow.....listen I just want to say I write poems all the time and well to be honest with you like everything in your poem happened to me I ran on the road and got hit by a car trying to commit suicide cause I wanted to die and I felt so alone my mom didn't believe me either and I'm 18 and my dad is only doing nine months and the sad thing is it will always be with me no matter what I do. We have so much in common but when I was sixteen I told about it and I told the cops I lied because mom needed his money to live off of, but then he tried to kill himself and so I went to school the next day and told them that it did really happen and it was happening for the ten years I lived with them. This was happening from my adopted dad.

  • by Marie, West Sussex
  • 8 years ago

Wow your poem touched me and I'd like to say that you are such a strong person and you will go on to inspire so many because of this. I was sexually abused when I was 7 up to the age of 12 by my mums partner and I went to the police today and reported him too.
I hope that your suffering ends soon and that you get your freedom you deserve. No one who doesn't stand by you is not worth your time.
And I know it's hard but if it happens again try and catch it on your mobile? Concrete evidence this way although it is painful :(
please stay strong and fight for your freedom and right to happiness. We could all choose to run from our pain but it will always catch up with us. I'm 21 now and it has taken me this long to be just about emotionally strong enough to make my abuser pay, and this has been hard as I see him often (he lives in the same town).
I really do wish you well, don't give up and never stop asking for help.. there's always someone who will listen, they have to.
Take care, I believe in you xx

  • by Wade Biloela
  • 8 years ago

We Care - Some advice.

Keep good records,

Write a diary full of detail - nail this man hard and hold your head high, mum will come around when she listens in court and sees his face of pretend remorse because he was caught. May he rot in there.

Protect others that he may have something to do with, keep him in jail. It's too late for you I know, I am sorry but please don't let him hurt anyone else.

P.S Your mum might be scared of being lonely, be there for mum and take care.
We pray you are ok and hope you are ok. It's not your fault that the predator did what he did. He is simply a predator. What else can you say.

Stay focused on what you want out of life and be proud and hold your head high that you beat a predator and saved other people.

God bless and take care

Wade and Chloe

  • by Iris
  • 8 years ago

I understand your pain... It is not your fault... I am in the 11th and I was hurt by my mom boyfriend...who told me he would kill me if I was to tell my mom on him...I just figured I would rather die before I let it continue...My mom went crazy when I told her...And of course he was going to deny it... But it's not your fault stay strong...

  • by Diane
  • 8 years ago

My heart hurts for you, my daughter was a victim too. It came out 3 years ago because of the abuse. We are here together and times are tough but I'm standing by my daughter. I wish I could hug you it's not easy for a mother to believe. There's a lot of guilt of how we couldn't see. I pray your mother wakes up before its too late.

  • by Krystal, Browns Plains
  • 8 years ago

I cried when I read this because I have been sexually abused myself. I wanted it badly to stop, but I didn't want to feel like a dibber dobber so I didn't tell anyone and I still haven't. He was my step uncle and I will NEVER forgive him for what he did. It only happened last year, when I was 13, but it feels likes it is still happening right now. I just wish I had the strength to tell somebody about it. I always tell GOD that I want to be better, but sometimes, it doesn't work. GOD is so powerful and will definitely help anyone through anything and I just hope that you pray to him/her every night/day.

In my prayers forever
Krystal
xx

  • by Crystal Galveston
  • 8 years ago

This story just made me cry and I do understand you because this happen to me to and I know how hard it is to get that out of your mind but just be strong and don't give up.

  • by Shelby, Louisiana
  • 8 years ago

Your story is almost exactly my own...but when I got scared and told them I lied... I couldn't take it no more and I ran away. The police found me an brought me back and he beat me. Then one day the cops came and took me away to a group home far far from him and my mom took his side each time, I know your pain. I use to cut really bad an I hated myself but there is a way out, I started going to church and I gave all my hurt to God and he healed me. I know God may be a hard thing to believe because I used to think if there is a God why would he let me hurt like this but I promise you when you have nothing left turn to God. He will heal your heart I promise you this. He healed mine, now I go every week to talk to abused girls that are at group homes and shelters to tell them about what God has done for me and what he can do for them. Maybe one day you too can be strong enough an help other girls like you.

  • by Danielle, California
  • 8 years ago

I am sorry for what has happened to you and I do understand how you feel. When I was a little girl I was molested by my cousin. It went on from the age of 5 till I was 10. I didn't know what to do I thought I did something wrong but it wasn't my fault at all. I am 16 now I will be 17 in June and until this day I still have memories of all those years of pain. I hope you find your way out and prosper in life I will pray for you every night before I go to bed. I love the poem and it made me cry.
Love Always,

  • by Clay, Asia
  • 8 years ago

I was molested when I was about 8 yrs of age by a guy that was older than me. Then 2 of my cousins took advantage of me and molested me too. Saying that they'd tell if I didn't let them. Then rumors started to spread everywhere and to my family. My family try to love me as best as they can, but never say a word and I know it hurts them. I can see it in their eyes. I've lost every friend I had for years after they learned that I was molested. People look at me like I'm gay or something, sometimes I just want to die! I would feel so hopeless and to this day I have hatred in my heart. Sometimes I find myself plotting to kill those responsible for all of it!

So you're not alone, I'm glad to share my story with you. The best way is to keep living your life to the fullest and don't give a damn about what people say about you and. Life is short, remember that.

  • by Claire, Peterborough
  • 8 years ago

SherryOMG!
honestly I do childcare at college, I have to do child protection.
I cant believe all the comments I have just read it makes me sick to my stomach that people can be so stupidly sick and abuse their children or any child for that matter.
I wish I could just save every child or adult who is being abused right now including all of you!
I seriously am almost crying right now.
God bless you all.
I hope one day I can try and make a change in the number of abusers in the world!

  • by Taija, Mesick
  • 8 years ago

I was sexually abused when I was younger by my cousins dad. He told me to never say a word or something bad would happen to my cousin, she's the only one younger then me so I felt like I had to protect her. I went back to make sure my cousin was OK I swore that night I felt the pain inside I would kill him before he ever touched my cousin. I can feel every touch still and I remember everytime it happened still. But, 2 years ago I started going to church and then I went to church camp. The 2nd year I went I ended up telling everyone what happened to me and they told my family. I still see that guy all the time and I just want to scream, I don't date at all cause I never know what's going to happen, I don't trust guys. The police said it's out of their hands cause they don't have proof. It was so long ago. One day I will confront him myself when I know I am strong enough and ask if he can sleep good at night knowing what he did to me and if he is proud of himself?

  • by Sue Metcalf
  • 8 years ago

My lovely Louise, I hope you read this. It is quite awful and horrendous, but there is a way out, of that I am convinced. you will never forget, but if you forgive that is a big help. ALWAYS remember that it is not your fault, always always always remember this. This same thing happened to my best friends daughter. It was awful and I was extremely close to her. I was able to take her out and talk for hours to her where she couldn't talk to her Mum about it, as it was her Mums partner who had done this awful thing to her. Louise, please don't think there is no way out. You won't forget, but PLEASE don't let it ruin your life. Don't let this person win, you are stronger than that. All my love, Sue xx

  • by kelsea
  • 9 years ago

I understand 100%, though my mom knew what he did to me she did nothing but let it happen but she's a slut that's why. She was in the room with us when he did it. She didn't care she told me it's normal and it's just a family thing something to be passed down to us that we'd never forget. She's right I wont forget. But what she doesn't know is I wont forgive. I left her at 15 and now I'm 17 and I have a 1 year old son and to him I have no family, when he is to ask I will tell him they all died. Because what was passed down should stop . I'm not that old and I know right from wrong and know what kind of mother I am and what kind she was. I will break the chain of what they pass down even if I have to tell my son the entire story I'll do the right thing.

  • by Tanya
  • 9 years ago

your poem is well written with lots of feeling in it. I also write poems on my life experience, its almost the same as yours, I was raped more than once and by more than one person and once by three guys at once...I know how you feel and all I can tell you is to just be strong and get away from that guy ASAP.

  • by nikki
  • 9 years ago

I completely understand how you feel I was raped by my mom's boyfriend from the age of 12 until May of last year. I am now 17 and have one child and one on the way with my fiancé` and we live on our own in our own house that we together own. So it doesn't always have to be bad in the end. Keep your head high and hang in there and always always remember your not alone

  • by Meljo
  • 9 years ago

You are so brave and your poem was so touching. There is a way out, you have made the first step, that is telling the world. Now go to the police and forget your Mom. In time, you will be healed and loved. There is hope.

  • by faith
  • 9 years ago

well I now how you feel my dads roommate raped me when I was only 5. I tried to tell someone but no one would listen they said I was lying and I hated them for it. Some times I think I don't belong I cut myself. Me and my friend feel the same its been so long since then I was 5 when it happened and now I'm turning 15. I've lived with it for so long I'm tired of it now no one believes it but my one friend. We often cry ourselves asleep. We hold each other and cry and say someday our misery will be over and we will be happy that all I got to say

  • by Beth
  • 9 years ago

Don't give up. keep fighting for your rights. Never think that your stuck forever, you will escape one day. you will be free. I know what it feels like to be alone. I am only 12 but life has not been to easy so far for me. I know you can get through this. just keep fighting. don't give up.

  • by Keri
  • 9 years ago

I am sorry for how you are being made to feel. I know the feeling to an extent. I was molested from 3 till 14. I never told ANYONE!. I still have not. I feel that I have a major trust issue with men for this reason. I have four children and guard them with my life, and for this I have current marital problems. Be sure to get help or at least find someone that you can talk to when you have the feelings and thoughts you need to get out. I wrote a lot of things down however I burned them because I never wanted anyone to find them. So in a sense I never had an out. I hope all goes well.

  • by swho
  • 9 years ago

Dear Abused 17 year old young lady,

Do not ever stop fighting for your rights. I have been abused myself when I was very young. Eventually, all stopped because I learned to fight and say NO. I screamed and God heard me crying and answered my prayers. Talk to a counselor at your school. Get help. Do not ever let him touch you again. Lock your room, refuse to be home alone with him, get a tape recorder or a camera and set it up in your room if you can. Have him pay for what he did. I will pray for you. Do not run away. Finish your education, be successful. In this world it is not safe to run away. You might get killed and you have a beautiful future ahead of you. Get professional help. Believe on yourself. Do not let others let you down. Have courage, be strong, fight for your safety.
Love,
S.

  • by Karleigh
  • 9 years ago

I Feel You Pain. My Mom's boyfriend sexually abused me from the age of 4 to16. It took me that long to say something. and now I'm 21 .although he said he would kill me if I said anything my mom does not believe me at all. She says I'm lying and I don't care about her..all that stuff he did does effect my relationship with men and it seems like no one understands me or what I'm going through......including my boyfriend

  • by Iz
  • 9 years ago

I feel your pain your not alone god will take care of you. I went through it my suppose to be grandpa raped me when I was in like 2nd grade it's sad the way I had to face that situation! But I did it kills me I am one sad girl and each year gets worst but I'm here 4 a reason and I chose to stay to fine out!Your the same you should just think of you and make the very best of the remaining time you have don't forget the past utilize it It will make you a stronger person he will rot and have a horrible after life that's if there is an afterlife he can't count with god. God stopped helping him the day he hurt you so hang in there try not to think about it let it go I know it's hard but if you keep it in your thoughts it's going to cause more hatred and build up emotions will be created and it's not worth it he's not worth your pain and suffer and we all know that. So don't worry be happy, live your life away from reckless sick mental idiots! Don't have nothing to do with it !

  • by holly
  • 9 years ago

I understand because I went through the same thing and no one believed me I didn't know what to do every one called me a liar

  • by Nikii
  • 9 years ago

WOW!! that poem made me cry! You're tough! be strong!

  • by Shanice
  • 9 years ago

this story/poem really touched me as its true there is no way out!
unless you are brave enough to tell someone but most little girls and boys aren't so the suffer inside =[

  • by Samantha
  • 9 years ago

I too have been sexually abused, and raped as a little girl by my uncle, and also by my ex boyfriend of almost two years. My uncle said he would kill me if I said anything so I never told the cops, just my mother. I couldn't press charges on my ex boyfriend because I didn't have physical proof. I am turning 17 soon, and know how you feel. There are people who do understand you and know what you feel. The feeling of being a victim of sexual abuse is horrible. But no one hide it, it's better to get it out and have something done, and to know that it can be put to a stop. I am sorry for what happened to you. I hope that everything works out for you, and I hope that you can find that one person that won't do that to you again. Best of luck. Take care.

  • by melissa
  • 9 years ago

this poem has touched me a lot I hate it when kids get rape or abused. its so sad. I had a friend who was abused by her dad she told me and her friends not to tell anyone. but we wanted to she was scared if she told the police that her dad would beat her up more. but she's in Florida right now with her mom. I miss her! stop child abuse!

  • by Maddie
  • 9 years ago

you are a beautiful person.
I hope you know that.
don't let anyone tell you you're not

  • by Jessica
  • 9 years ago

I'm going through this right now I'm 22 and just told my mom about my grandfather who molested me. He is still around and in our lives, well not since last week. Its hard cause that's who took care of us when my father left us and who my mother trusted. I never wanted her to know cause I knew it would hurt her and I didn't want to be the cause of that. I felt alone too at first but since I've told my story it seems there is more of us then we know and we all are going through the same things I'm sorry you have the pain I have. I wish you all the luck in the world and hopefully we will be happy one day!

  • by Shawn
  • 9 years ago

I completely understand where you are coming from. I am 27 years old now. When I was a little girl I was molested by one of my mom's cousins and she didn't believe me. Then when I was 11 years old I was sexually molested by my uncle for almost a year. He told me that if I ever told anyone he was going to kill me. So I never told. My aunt caught him in the act and blamed me for it. She then kicked me out of her house and I went to live with a family who eventually adopted me. It has been very hard for me and I have had many bad relationships. I hope you overcome everything you are going through and I will pray that you seek freedom.

  • by natashajohnson
  • 9 years ago

when I was 11 year old I got raped by my uncle for 3 year in a row. When I was a 11, 12 and the last time so far when I was 13. I keep it in for all those year until one day I just couldn't keep it in no longer to this day I am 15 years old and to this day it hurt when I try to have fun or watch a movie that has to do with sexual abuses I sit there and I have a flash back on what happen every time and I cry and now since that happen to me my whole life has change but I am going to over come sexual abuses, rape, getting beat, and everything that come my way. thank you for reading my story.

  • by Not gonna say
  • 9 years ago

I love this poem it describes me a lot. This same thing happened to me. My step dad still lives with us and I want to open the case so bad but am too scared. My mom doesn't believe me and when she found a note I wrote a friend about it she yelled at me and said what would you have done if he would have found it. I am so scared it is going to happen again.

  • by alyssa
  • 9 years ago

I was raped two years ago and I'm only 15. I thought I would never be me again. Sometimes it still hurts to recall it but you just got to know that in the end everything will be ok. There are ways out one way or another and death doesn't have to be one anymore. I'll pray for you.

  • by Mona
  • 9 years ago

don't worry you're not alone it seems like almost the same thing has happened to me to. I know how it feels to be sad and alone. but if you have made it this far that shows how strong you are to keep moving on.

  • by hannah
  • 9 years ago

This poem is good. I loved it. You know I'm a victim of sexual abuse too, it happened 2 years ago and by my step dad. I told my mom the night it happened and she believed me 100% and left him. It still comes to me now and what he did messed me up and changed who I am. I started cutting and doing drugs to take away the pain. The court didn't do anything they sent him to AA meetings and Parenting classes they said he should register as a sex offender and they're letting it slide... I thought it was my fault and went to therapy, I signed about 10 contracts saying I won't cut anymore. I failed out of 8th grade. But I know where your coming from this poem made me tear up. But keep your head up, don't show him he ruined your life. There's a light at the end of the tunnel, I promise!

  • by Tina Steele
  • 9 years ago

I was raped at the age of 6 by my stepfather and then continuously for 11 years. my mother blamed me and said "I let it happened cause I hated her and wanted to ruin her life by stealing her husband". so every time my stepdad chose to touch me she would beat me severely with a metal pipe. I called out for help over and over again but no one would listen or help but I finally got placed in foster care 5 months before my 18th birthday but by then it was too late for the damage had been done. your poem reminded me of this and really touched this. you used very vivid imagery and chose very nice wording. good job.

  • by Stephanie
  • 9 years ago

I really loved this poem I know how you feel except it was my uncle. My mom doesn't hate me but she doesn't believe me. But keep on writing and you will go far

  • by Sherepha
  • 9 years ago

I was raped when I was 12. I have dissociated (make myself forget it ever happened). reason being, I told my mom who was reluctant in believing and the police thought of it not as a rape they told me I wanted it. I was so confused as to why they would say such a horrid thing and for sometime I even started to actually think it was true, saying it was my fault. I became very depressed, sad and lonely. I felt isolated, I thought no one cared. then one night I told my best to just forget it ever happened since that is the only way I'd ever smile again and regain control over my life. I am now 17. I know living denial is the easy but the wrong way out and that dissociating only impedes recovery. but I just cant come face to face with this torment so I prefer to just forget about that nightmare :-(

  • by joana voice
  • 9 years ago

Trust me someone understands and she must say that this poem reminds her so much of her own story. It's been years since I was abused and I still look in the road and think how easy it would be to take one step into it, but I never do because I know that I'll survive and that I'm going to make a difference to someone like you did with your poem.

  • by cassy
  • 9 years ago

your story/poem helped me a lot my dad abused me from when I was seven till I was thirteen. you made me realize that my life is not that bad although I still suffer, my mum stuck by me and she has given me the strength to continue living. I hope it all turns out ok for you good luck

  • by stacy
  • 9 years ago

My mom did the same thing. She hates me. She would only use what he did to me to her advantage. I really hope you are able to read this because I DO understand. I'm sorry it happen to you to. I'm only 16. I thought my baby sister and I were the only ones who went through it and their own mother turned against them. I hope everything turns out in your favor. He NEEDS to be put away. Maybe show the police this poem. I plan to use mine against him. Good Luck & Love

  • by michelle
  • 9 years ago

I know how you feel my brother molested me and it continued for about 6 years

  • by aleeca
  • 9 years ago

your story/poem was amazing I know that I haven't really experienced what you had but I feel your pain I think its important to remember its not your fault I think you did the right thing by telling and don't let your mom get to you if she wants to be with that monster over you let it be and ill be praying for you hoping this man will be sent away. you seem so amazing!!

  • by jasmen
  • 9 years ago

omg that is the saddest thing I have ever read. I am thirteen but I can just imagine how you felt. Your so young to be going thru all this. your poem is really going to inspire one person out there. I hope you live and love your life. The past is the past just look forward to your future. = D

  • by Ebony Braylee
  • 9 years ago

you go over and over it in your mind. you push it right to the back but you still know that it is there. the pain you feel will not get better until you start to help it. you have done the first part, telling! I think you are so brave already. if you are strong enough to tell you are certainly strong enough to get through what is yet to come. just hang in there and know that you are an amazing person who can deal with anything life throws at you. thank you for writing such an amazing poem. my thoughts are with you always. stay strong!

  • by Marissa
  • 9 years ago

I was sexually abused from 3rd to 9th grade I'm in 11th now....and its hard for me every day no one understands
there's so many times I'll be walking down the street and when a car comes I just want to jump in front of it...
when my friends are with me and they see a car they grab me and make sure I stay on the right side of the road...
I use to cut but not no more
everyday I want to more and more
there's so many things that I hide inside and sometimes its just to much and I want to die!

  • by sheralee knight
  • 9 years ago

Reading this poem truly touched my heart. I'm 16 I have been abused by a family member only once but I understand the pain of a mother hating you and not believing a single word you say. Although you try your hardest to make it go away it won't and it can't until you are ready to let it go. My heart goes out to you, really it does, you are so brave to come forward and tell the world what the monster has done to you inside and out. I feel your pain but you will make it through you made it this far! and you have to keep fighting, for you have what it takes. You just have to believe in your self!! Amazing poem and amazing girl! I hope all works out xo

  • by Pamela.Annette
  • 9 years ago

I just want to tell you how brave you are, I am not going to go into MY story, because I don't want to take away from yours. Just remember, God is always here for you. He is a faithful God whom loves us unconditionally, if you reach out for him, he wont let you fall. I know it might seem hard to believe at times, just pray and everyone else pray, With GOD all things are possible! Blessings.

  • by Tina
  • 9 years ago

I was molested at the age of 7 it lasted a couple of years. I hate him and wanted for him to die. I'm now 31 yrs old and have let go and let God take care of him. Put your trust in God and He will get you thru. As for your mom she doesn't deserve you. She will one day regret it. Never give up. Take the hate out of your life and God will give you the peace that you need. I will pray for you. The truth will set you free.

  • by Allison
  • 10 years ago

I have been through abuse too, I am seventeen also. If you want to talk or want help, I can help you. You should do all that you can to get out of this situation. Remember, IT IS NOT YOUR FAULT!!! For the longest time I thought that I did something to provoke it. But as I got out of the situation I realized that I did nothing to deserve such a thing. No on deserves this! I am not a very religious person but I will pray for you. I really hope that things turn out okay for you. And don't let your mother get to you. Some people choose men over their kids cause they feel that they need them. Well honey, I'll tell you something nobody needs a man! I am just starting to get over all that has happened. JUST REMEMBER THERE IS HOPE!

Good Luck Honey
and I will be thinking about you

  • by Deanne
  • 10 years ago

My son at 2yrs. old was molested by his father. I felt the guilt that it was my fault I married the man. The man who took my son's innocence away at such a young age. But now he's 24 and still feels dirty. But he knows through it all I was there with him. I loved him and protected him all of his life. I hate when kids tell someone and no one believes them. I did believe my son and I'm still here for him.

  • by Karen M. Thiemermann
  • 10 years ago

I am a 52yr old woman who went through abuse as a child and a teenager for many years and kept it inside my whole life. It has manifested into a physical issue now and my doctor, who I finally came clean with after all these years has given me hope.
I would love to get in touch with her or just let her know, TELL SOMEONE-DON'T KEEP IT INSIDE!

  • by Melissa A Magrey
  • 10 years ago

I was sexually abused when I was a little girl by my grandfather (Dad's dad). It started when I was about 6. It felt like it went on for years, but it did for 4. I am 35 now. I do have control, he has died, so that was the hope I had that I could move on. I wanted to kill him myself but I was too late, his heart gave out. I have allot of issues I still try to deal with. My other grandfather just a few years back tried to sexually assault me, I was older, stronger.. I got out. He has died also a couple years ago, most say from guilt. I have not yet been able to forgive or forget but I am able to live. Just don't give up keep trying to deal, it wasn't our fault****Although we are affected by our abuse STILL, we as survivors need have to live.

  • by Melissa
  • 10 years ago

I feel so bad for anyone that goes through this. I did and so did my sister and a lot of other girls. It was my father and he also molested my daughter. She is 25 now and will not admit it...She has wiped it away, but I know that everyone deals with it different. I do not feel bad like I did anything, he was the sick person. I do care hate for him and always will. I believe in karma. 2 yrs. ago he became very sick and we (his children) had to make a decision to pull him off life support or let him live...Well we pulled it and watched him die. I know that sounds horrible...but it is nothing compared to what he did to my daughter, sisters and me and many more!! I will tell you this...what any molester does to u...don't give them the satisfaction of ruining your life. Move on and know that they will get theirs!! Smile inside and out and it will all be ok. I promise!!!

  • by Ariana
  • 10 years ago

that poem touched me and I cried as I read that I'm only 13 but I feel her pain! it is horrible what people do to some of us and I think they should all just die but that poem was the best one that I have ever read!

  • by Kari R. McGarvie
  • 10 years ago

when I was a little girl I was sexually and physically abused it went on for about 2 years every night my mom went to work I finally got the courage to tell someone it was hard but it had to be done I was scared and still am I am not myself and have difficulties with relationships but I am trying to work on it and I know everything will be just okay!

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