Mental Illness Poem

My name is Brittany, and I suffer from panic disorder, which stops me from doing regular things. I can't go into a store or car, for example, without having a panic attack. I write a lot of poetry so I thought I'd share this with you describing how I feel when I have one.

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I'm Rose, I'm only 14, and have suffered from severe anxiety and social anxiety since I was around 10. For the past 2 years I've suffered from depression, this poem literally lit up my heart....

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Panic Attack

© more by Brittany

Published by Family Friend Poems July 2011 with permission of the Author.

Closing in all around me,
a fear I can't describe.
All shaky and confused,
I think I'm going to die.

Thoughts so unsettling
are blocking everyone's attempts.
When all they try is to help me,
I can't make sense of this.

My heart hurts,
my head hurts,
and crying about it
only makes it worse.

Nobody can ever
truly understand,
and unless you've gone through it,
you wouldn't stand a chance.

It's just anxiety,
another day of black.
You must think that I'm crazy.
It's just another panic attack.

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Has this poem touched you? Share your story!
  • Julia Vin by Julia Vin
  • 6 years ago

Hi, my name is Julia. I'm 15 and I've had anxiety and I can't go out in public without having at least 3 panic attacks. I've had them since I was about 5. It started when I heard my parents' first fight. I heard all of them after that and my parents got divorced. My panic attacks have been getting worse with symptoms such as loss of feeling in my legs, blacking out, not being able to hear people, rapidly shaking until I fall, and sometimes passing out. It takes me about 30 minutes for the attack to be over, but I shake and feel unbalanced for a few hours after it. I haven't had any help with "dealing" with them since I don't have a very good home life. I haven't told my mother how bad they have gotten. I think they got worse because of school and we are moving. Thank you if you read all of this. I think I really needed to get this out.

  • Anonomous by Anonomous
  • 8 years ago

I used to have really bad panic attacks (luckily they've gotten better now), but this and everyone else's comments makes me feel a lot better. I had a few friends that were going through similar things, but if I talked about it then it would make me sound like an attention seeker. I still get anxious sometimes, but at least I know that I'm not the only one. Thank you for writing this poem.

  • Rose H. Mari by Rose H. Mari
  • 8 years ago

I'm Rose, I'm only 14, and have suffered from severe anxiety and social anxiety since I was around 10. For the past 2 years I've suffered from depression, this poem literally lit up my heart. When I have panic attacks everybody tells me to get through it, breathe deep. But it doesn't work, I know it's never going to go away and I envy people that live with no constant fear. My parents don't understand that my social anxiety will affect my life. Going up and asking people questions is my worst nightmare. Ordering things from menus? Forget about it. I always thought that nobody understands, what it felt like what I'm going through, but you do. You understand the dark snaps, and the loneliness and the shaky breaths. I've read so many of these poems that are fake and attention begging. But yours truly stands out. This literally made me cry. Thank you. Thank you so much for helping me realize I'm not alone.

  • Kota by Kota, Michigan
  • 8 years ago

I'm Kota. Honestly I don't know what to say besides this spoke to me on so many different levels. I absolutely love this for the ounces of truth in this. I don't really know why, but I just want to thank you. I used to write all of the time and I just threw it all out. I couldn't continue to pick myself apart. I absolutely love poetry. And I don't know what life is like without terrible anxiety, or any mental "illnesses" to be exact. It's panic attacks constantly. It's drowning yourself in worry, doubt, and not even realizing what is even happening until you snap out of it. I could go on about this forever. And I was always that person who could talk about everything and anything. And I still can to an extent. The line is drawn between constantly fighting my own demons and letting people in. The more you feed them, the hungrier they become. I'm running out of characters. But I swear if you ever want to share poems. I should start writing again. I would love to read them. Take care.

  • Samantha K by Samantha K
  • 8 years ago

I'm 17 and I have severe anxiety also.

I can really relate to your poem. People who don't have panic attacks really don't know the kind of pain it causes. It's like a war that never ends. Fighting all day every day...it's exhausting and horrible.

And when you tell people about it, they just tell you to take a deep breath or something, as if that's some magical cure. If that really worked, I wouldn't still be suffering from this, now would I?

  • Amaab9 by Amaab9
  • 7 years ago

I feel so bad for you. I wish that taking a deep breath was a magical cure, but that's not the way it is. "People who don't have panic attacks really don't know the kind of pain it causes. It's like a war that never ends. Fighting all day every day...it's exhausting and horrible." Reading this made me feel really sad. People that don't have it think you're just asking for attention, and that don't really try to help. Some people are jealous because they want all the attention, but if they had this they wouldn't wish so, huh? Such a sad and deep poem. I wish there was a pill in the world that cures everything, mentally and physically. I don't have severe anxiety, so I have a few questions. Is sleep a relief to you, or does it give you endless nightmares? I don't want to seem ignorant or rude, I just want to ask from someone who actually has it.

  • Jade by Jade
  • 8 years ago

Hi Brittney, I basically just wanted to let you know that I went through panic attacks everyday when I was 17. I did not leave the house. It was an awful feeling; for me it would start out as electric shock feelings in my veins and the fear of the pain would escalate into a full blown panic attack where I would completely freak out. Afterwards, I wouldn't remember what happened. I've had other versions of panic attacks as well; my first panic attack I was 11 years old and called 911. I am now 21 years old and I have Jesus Christ as my Lord and saviour. He is very real, and there is power in his name. Try calling on him if you like, ask to know him if you so desire. I no longer suffer from panic attacks like that. I am set free from the demonic oppression. I also came to a realization years ago that really ended the panic: I'm either gonna die and it will be over or it will eventually end and everything will be OK like it always is. Much love. I speak peace to you in Jesus name!

  • Blondiegirl by Blondiegirl
  • 10 years ago

I have been struggling with anxiety for a few years now. It just came out of the blue. It is such an awful dreadful thing and for people that don't have any idea what it is like, it is hard for them to understand. They think you can just pull yourself out of it. Better said than done. I wish it was that easy. I get weird pains, feel like I can't breath and that scares the crap out of me. Sometimes I feel like just crying and I don't know why. It is an everyday fight, a constant battle. Will it ever be over?????

  • Britain by Britain
  • 10 years ago

I suffer from panic attack every day, I find it embarrassing to go out with friends or family. I know exactly what you mean. I felt comfort when I read your story, thank yo and I hope anyone who is suffering get past it and lives the life that we want.

  • Kaity by Kaity, Oregon
  • 11 years ago

I have panic attacks. Anxiety disorders run in my family so we call them anxiety attacks but it's the exact same thing. It feels like my throat is closing and I shake like you wouldn't believe. Does it get hot to you? I feel so hot like everything is closing in more and more and I can't stop fidgeting. I have the full-on fight/flight/freeze reaction. I've done all of them. Screamed at my friends to "Please be quiet for once!", ditched classes to hide in the bathroom and frozen...staring straight ahead at nothing. Teachers are so hard on me about my grades. They don't get that I'm doing the best I can.

  • Lucy Nocella by Lucy Nocella
  • 11 years ago

I a bipolar, and I have panic attacks too. I cried when I read this poem. Many people make fun of mental illness. If you could only understand what it is like to have a panic attack, I loose my breath, I can't swallow, my heart beats fast, when you explain this to people it is all in your head. How sad.

The poem I read should be framed.

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