Meaningful Poem

Confusion Of Life

My name is Judy Einhorn. Since I can remember, I have had a deep love and appreciation for writing and poetry. Most importantly, I often use poetry as a tool for healing and expressing pain that I have a hard time verbalizing or sharing with people. The following poem I wrote while undergoing therapy.

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Chasing Shadows

©

Published: July 2017

For me, life is a struggle.
It's an impossible reality every single day.
I try to understand, try to unlock the secrets,
To unravel the mystery.
I search for meaning, for reasons behind it all,
But I keep on stumbling.
I keep on hitting brick walls.
It's like going in circles, running after something,
With no beginning at all.
But there must be a reason.

I can't precisely describe the way I usually feel,
But I know I'm not happy,
Yet I'm not exactly sad either.
I don't feel like I'm living,
But I don't feel dead either.
I dread my existence,
However, I choose to continue going.
It's like I'm caught in a jumble of emotions,
Enveloped in emptiness and confusion.

I've learned
Unexpressed emotions never die.
They may be buried alive,
But later
They will come forth in uglier ways.
So perhaps,
After so many years of successful subjugation,
I've reached that point
Where all the suppression has broken loose.
It has all been unleashed,
Forced out in desperation,
Creating a storm of raging emotions.
And I am now left to deal
With an endless stream
Of relentless agitation.

more by Judy Einhorn

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