Alone Poem

This is a poem of how I have felt abandoned by those few that claimed to love me throughout my life.

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Welcome into the world of an outcast and survivor! Since I was born, my mother didn't want me and said I ruined her life, but my dad loved me. When she gave birth to my sister and brother,...

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Feelings Of Abandonment

© more by Angela Fernatt

Published: November 2007

I keep looking for comfort from you
I sit and wonder if your love is true
You see me crying
Inside you have to know I'm dying
Don't you see these tears
Don't you see the hurt from so many years
The little girl that was hurt so bad
Is now 30 years old and utterly sad
No one to listen or even to talk to
Recalling memories that hurt me through and through
The things you ask of me
It triggers a memory
Memories I'd rather forget
Memories embedded in my mind, completely set
The hurt, the pain and anger won't go away
I wonder who "loves me" and will turn their back today
I can't explain how I feel inside
Feelings of abandonment rush in like the tide
Ghosts haunt me no matter where I go
I do love you still, that you should know
I wish you could understand
I would be there holding your hand
I would take away all your pain
So in the end, you'd have a life to gain
But for me, darkness is all I see
No happiness for this little girl is to be
The adult lives her life
Taking on happiness, sorrow and strife
I hope someday you'll understand
Someday I hope you'll be here to comfort me and hold my hand
Until that day all I feel is punishment
Along with those never-ending feelings of abandonment

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more by Angela Fernatt

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Has this poem touched you? Share your story!
  • StephAngie Cote by StephAngie Cote
  • 9 months ago

Welcome into the world of an outcast and survivor! Since I was born, my mother didn't want me and said I ruined her life, but my dad loved me. When she gave birth to my sister and brother, they have always been her favorite ones. They turned the family against me. I was bullied at school and at home. I was dealing with depression and I was alone, no one to talk to. When I got married and had two children, I always wanted to protect my children from mental abuse or alcoholics. When I moved out, I never told my folks where I moved, and they had no way of contacting me. When I gave birth to my daughter, they didn't know, until she was 4 years old, and ever since, they’ve been into our lives. Nothing changed. We live in Ottawa and they live in the Quebec side. The more distance, the better it is. My son is 19 and my daughter is 14 (we lost a baby boy at birth in 2016).

  • Rebecca Stra8ght by Rebecca Stra8ght
  • 2 years ago

The poem touched me. I never could get close to my family. My dad left my mom when I was 11 years old. I saw how my dad would beat my mom up all the time. When my dad would have visits with me, he and his new wife treated me like crap. They made me go bed at 8 pm every night. I could only eat when they said. I had to sneak snacks when they were not around. They called me all kinds of names. My mom had all kinds of boyfriends, and one of them raped me when I was 12 years old. I told my mom about it, and she did not believe me. I tried to kill myself. My mom was a very religious person, and I was not allowed to go to dances or have a boyfriend. In order to get away from being abused, I went to the job corps in 1987. Now since I was abused, I have problems trusting men.

  • Unknown by Unknown, Brownsville Tx
  • 5 years ago

I just don't understand why this had to happen to me. I didn't do anything & I wish I was dead or never born. My dad left when I was not even 3. My mom & I moved around a lot & finally my mom found work in another city. So that meant we had to live with my grandma & uncle. It was hell. My uncle would go into my bed & sexually abused me. I didn't do anything. I was 8 & it didn't stop until I was 14. My mom caught him. We moved & then my mom got a boyfriend. Now she's never here. She's always with him & I have always felt abandoned, but hey I'm just sugar coating it. I have never hated myself & my life so much.

  • Darla Stoltzfus by Darla Stoltzfus
  • 3 years ago

Hello friend. Sorry to hear of your losses and the pain that you have been going through. How are you doing now? I will be praying for you.

  • Kanz by Kanz, London
  • 9 years ago

This story reminds me of a traumatic childhood. it makes me feel so much in just a few lines and yet it brings me comfort. nobody but the one person I love know my secret. so I'm alone and not alone, the simplest question that brings a memory, takes me away from this reality. Thanks for reading.

  • Fiz by Fiz
  • 9 years ago

I can't help but cry when I read this poem. It reached out to my heart. Born out of wedlock in an Asian community almost 40 yrs ago, I struggled with vicious comments and hurtful attitude by relatives. All this while my own mother ignored me.

  • StephAngie Cote by StephAngie Cote
  • 9 months ago

It's not your fault...no one should have to feel blamed, and we are all in the same boat...survivors. They have issues and they need help...we are stronger, pure souls. Some people are evil, and we are threats for them...we have the power of God, faith, love, and peace in our hearts. Just remember...always be proud, love and believe in yourself no matter what. Who cares what they think, say or believe?

  • Donna by Donna
  • 10 years ago

I am very much effected by. I feel as if I wrote this myself. Whoever wrote this poem, made me feel a lot of feelings I haven't had in years. It actually reminded me of being a SURVIVOR and not a victim. I was abandoned at 3 months old. Left at a mental health hospital for anyone to have whatever, or whoever took me what would end up my destiny. Not a good outcome but, I guess it could of been a whole lot worse. No, wait, no it was the worse... Thank-You for your thoughts and sharing them.

  • Denver CO by Denver CO
  • 10 years ago

It's like this person knows my life story my mom pimped me out because she had a drug problem so I had to grow up fast.

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