Humorous Poem

Humorous Poem About Testing Gold

After spending over 40 years as an academic and industrial research chemist, I have become intrigued with the large number of important scientific discoveries that have been advanced through serendipity and humor.

Most of the chemists and physicists that I have had the pleasure to work with could easily start a second career as stand-up comedians. The public at large, especially young people, need to know that working as a scientist, although very challenging, is never dull or boring!

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Archemedes Was All Wet

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Published: May 2014

King Hero of old Syracuse had doubts that made him frown.
"Perhaps my goldsmith did not use pure gold to make the crown."
Since proof of mischief must be strong to put a thief in collar,
The king who feared his judgment wrong called on his science scholar.
"Archimedes, friend of old, find me the solution!
Is my crown pure solid gold, or is that an illusion?"
The scholar's task was serious; he struggled hard with math.
His mind was near delirious until he poured his bath.
He noticed how the water pushed him up as he stepped in.
He thought about it harder as he stroked his bearded chin.
"The weight of displaced liquid should always let me know
When any golden solid has a density too low!"
"Eureka!", he resounded. "I have such a clever mind".
Yet his claim was unfounded 'cause he left his clothes behind!

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