Abuse Poem

Exposing My Vulnerabilities

I was sexually abused by my brother during my childhood. Dividing my inner self from the "me" I show the world has allowed me to rise to success in many areas: social, economic, and academic. Yet, it is this driving force which isolates; it creates a giant wall between myself and the people around me. They think I am beautiful, successful, lucky. The guilt and pain I perpetually endure as a result of the abuse makes me feel as though I am living a double life.

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I feel this pain deep within my heart when I read this poem over and over again. I’m currently living with my mom and she can make every second of my life a living hell if I don’t do what she...

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Published by Family Friend Poems October 2018 with permission of the author.

Don't believe my words;
they're lies that I fabricate to
project a perfect life and
convince you I'm okay.   
       
Don't trust the smile you see; 
it's a facade to conceal
searing pain, acute shame,
sheer heartache.

Don't get fooled by my laughter;
it is merely an echo
of hollow insides, yearning
for senses to return.

Don't get convinced by my clarity and order;
borne in attempt to
control the chaos   
and pacify the storm brewing inside.

Don't be blinded by
The perfection I exude,
The courage I fake,
The innocence I feign, 
The confidence I wear-
For I am broken.

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Has this poem touched you? Share your story!
  • Ramona by Ramona
  • 2 years ago

I feel this pain deep within my heart when I read this poem over and over again. I’m currently living with my mom and she can make every second of my life a living hell if I don’t do what she wants...I’m currently in the 9th grade, and I don’t have anyone to talk to...I don’t want to turn out like her. She curses me and says that I'm a curse to her life. When she’s happy everybody else has to play the happy family, but when she’s mad, I’m scared that she might possibly kill me. Once, she made me look at the wall in my room and she beat me up with a broomstick until it broke, and after that she acts as if everything is okay. I feel like I’m getting dumber. I usually am an A and B student, but my grades have been slipping. I don’t have anyone to talk to, and I’m scared that I may not be able to cope with the situation any longer. I don’t want to turn out like her, but if I don’t get therapy, I’m scared that I might just be what I fear.

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  • Chaya M. Movsikov by Chaya M. Movsikov
  • 4 years ago

I was abused by my dad when I was a child. Whenever I think about it, it hurts. It hurts, and the worst part of it is that I can't tell anyone, not because I'm not allowed, but because of me. I'm scared to tell. I'm scared that they won't understand me, and I'm scared of being ashamed. I already feel ashamed. I love this poem that you wrote because it made me feel like I'm not the only one who went through something like this. Thank you for giving me strength to get through this.

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  • Saul Guereca by Saul Guereca
  • 2 years ago

I have gone through something very similar and it can be a living hell, you are not alone I can relate to the pain you feel, find someone who can help whatever you do you must release everything you are holding within, I know every second can be painful, but when you find someone to talk to trust me it's almost like you're pouring all the hurt on them and of course that's not what your doing but it feels really good "GOD FORGIVE ME" You shouldn't have to cope with it, just deal with it and heal it and move on with our lives my friend, look for spiritual help on how to heal your past traumas trust me from someone who wanted to commit suicide everyday I tried everything. I tell you spiritual healing is the only truth thing that works and that can heal your wounds, hope this helps my friend you are not alone, maybe you heal. One last note I suggest learning about chakras and reiki energy i know it seems weird but trust okay

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