Abuse Poems - Page 3

I try to rationalize
it all
as you
tear
right through me.

The monster's back tonight.

Fueled by alcohol
and past conversation,
by rage and
imagination,
you've become a beast
I hardly know
yet know too well.

I can't build walls fast enough
for you.

All these years have taught you well.

The assault
begins,
you're armed
with the thoughts
inside your head,
barbed words and
insinuations.

You leave wounds
no one sees
but me.

The monster's back tonight.

I can't build walls fast enough.

I try to rationalize it
all.

his belt hung on the wall, 
in the backroom where he victimized me;
as mom tried to stop it
the door slammed shut, click,
the feeling of leather against my skin,
cold sweats running through me
you could hear my cries,
begging him to stop,
like dogs screaming. 

he says he loves me,
but does he? 

his behavior was ugly,
picking me up by my arms,
pinning me against the wall,
in my face,
shouting ugly things. 

hiding in the bedroom corner while weeping in pain?
begging a higher power to make it all go away,
Why me? "I asked"
trying to imagine it all away,
the fighting, the phone calls, 
911
the knock at the door,
the young man in uniform, slender and tall.
the badge on his shirt,
two children clinging to their mom's leg,
not saying a word,
while imagining being saved,
does one deserve to shake?
shake like a creaking broken fence in the wind!

Yesterday might've gone down in flame
But I remember the nights spent alone
I remember your shame I called my own
I remember you and your twisted games

Yesterday might've gone down in flame
But I remember the days full of pain
I remember the scars and the pouring rain
I remember you and your twisted games

Yesterday might've gone down in flame
But I remember the storm and hurricane
I remember the clouds above my head
I remember the days I used to dread