Humorous Poems - Page 2
21 - 40 of 58 Poems
21. Dead Is Dead
When somebody dies, folks hardly ever say "dead."
They prefer "expired" or "departed" instead.
Most of the euphemisms don't do any harm,
Like "biting the dust" or "buying the farm."Featured Shared Story
I found this poem very refreshing and true. Very good.
22. Travel Blues
A voyage abroad with my good wife Maude turned into a real mess
In need of some rest in Budapest, about all I got was stress
Then in France I took a chance on some pork a little too rare
I so regret that Monsieur's toilette was very crowded there
Willis the cowpoke rode into town
On his Old Jugs, just horsing around.
Down highway 26 he rode Old Jugs
To the local saloon for a few chug-a-lugs.Featured Shared Story
These men get very well acquainted with their horses, their ole pals you might say, The clumping of horse hooves, the whinney demand for carrots and sugar cubes, the barn yard smell. kinda...
I lived my life, I tried my best to follow all my dreams.
My great endeavors were forever bursting at the seams.
And though I tried to love what's mine, I failed and I confess
My bony knees made pants like these suffer much distressFeatured Shared Story
This is one of the best humor poems I have ever read!! I remember reciting the poem in a competition in grade seven. Not only did it win me first prize, it also got me a lot of praise....
It seemed like a good idea at the time,
But looking back now, I cringe just a little.
I was so hungry and it WAS once mine,
The week old milk and peanut butter brittle.
The typical skittish behaviour when my body begins t' bustle,
All in the fact that I've fallen in love with the one and only Mr. Muscle:
How his passionate vibe shines when cleaning down my decks,
As his toned, articulate body moves, rhythmical with his pecs!
Spring has sprung, the time has come, for the greening of the trees
A time of change, renewal and growth for my allergies
Like everything else in this great world, Spring has its pluses and minuses
But its features are quite singular when it comes to my poor sinuses
30. The Car
I was heading south to the city's biggest shopping center
To get a steak and other things that I could eat for dinner.
Then I noticed, luckily, I was nearly out of gas.
So, I headed for the Stall-Mart store out near the overpass.Featured Shared Story
Yeah, it did. It's called a cliff hanger, so all in all they did have a proper ending. *shrug
They looked good, at first, together,
tight laced and polished smart,
but wear and tear destroyed them:
A tale to break your heart!Featured Shared Story
Loved this poem. Very smart and funny too. Well done!
King Hero of old Syracuse had doubts that made him frown.
"Perhaps my goldsmith did not use pure gold to make the crown."
Since proof of mischief must be strong to put a thief in collar,
The king who feared his judgment wrong called on his science scholar.
I did not wish to write this poem,
But it would not leave me be.
Throughout the night,
Throughout the day,Featured Shared Story
Same, girl! I don't write poems either! Thanks for expressing it in poem form!
35. Pigheaded Pete
Pigheaded Pete was an obstinate fool,
who argued no matter the topic,
shredding opinions with outrageous drool,
and anger that bordered psychotic.
As I lay cozy, all snug in my bed,
I enjoy the imagination inside my head
Until I hear racket beside my bed.
It's my 5:00 alarm!Featured Shared Story
The poem is absolutely cool. Man it has happened to me not more than a hundred times.
37. King For A Day
I'm resting here quite regally,
The feature of the table.
Surrounded by potatoes that
I'd taste if I were able.Featured Shared Story
This poem is definitely original and unique. I just never would have thought of looking at Thanksgiving from the turkey's point of view. Very cute poem. I really enjoyed it!
39. A Boy Named Sue
Well, my daddy left home when I was three,
and he didn't leave much to Ma and me,
just this old guitar and a bottle of booze.
Now I don't blame him because he run and hid,Featured Shared Story
Johnny Cash was the right person to sing these lyrics. He made an interesting song from an awesome poem. Very entertaining. Love it! Jac. Judy A. Campbell
21 - 40 of 58 Poems