41. Running From The Bear
I've spent many years now
Running from the bear.
Just when I think you're gone,
You once again are there.
I've spent many years now
Running from the bear.
Just when I think you're gone,
You once again are there.
As I lay silently, my heartbeat in my ear
The thunder of footsteps ringing in fear
The night is long and the anger strong
I wonder, is this where I belong?
I saw a monster, I promise he was real,
A presence haunting with a touch you could feel.
His footsteps echoed like a beast's heavy tread,
A roar of laughter that filled me with dread.
Daddy I remember
I remember it all
Everything you did to me
Don't you recall?
I look around for myself,
But a ghost is all I see.
I only see this ghost of a person I used to be.
I don't know who you are, but I know why you are here.
his belt hung on the wall,
in the backroom where he victimized me;
as mom tried to stop it
the door slammed shut, click,
I never thought I would have this conversation with you.
Listen, you were only 10 and didn't know what to do.
You did the best you could from the choices you had to chose.
It wasn't your fault.
Yesterday might've gone down in flame
But I remember the nights spent alone
I remember your shame I called my own
I remember you and your twisted games
Bodies contaminated, tainted by his sin,
Trapped in cycles, impossible to win.
Forced into silence, bearing heavy weight,
Burdened by shame, consumed by hate.