Addiction Poem about Family

My mother has been addicted to meth for as long as I can remember. It has affected my life in so many bad ways. I wrote this and put it into her mailbox as a way to tell her that I will have nothing to do with her anymore.

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My Mother Vs. Meth

©

Published by Family Friend Poems November 2008 with permission of the Author.

Most days I feel like screaming at the top of my lungs.
I want my mother back; who is this monster you have become?

I really haven't known who you are for quite a while,
But I try to act tough, so I force this fake smile.

You love someone else way more than me.
Her name is Crystal Meth, and I don't think she'll ever set you free.

She's had you in her hands for about 10 years,
But all of those years are nothing compared to my fear.

Fear of you lying,
Fear of you dying,
Fear of having so much faith in you and just being left crying.

You wrote me letters from prison and promised the sky.
More than 3 years later and nothing but lies.

Nothing but heartache, pain, and misery...
I GET IT NOW; you chose her over me.

You've told me to my face that it was drugs over me.
Even that wasn't enough to make me see.

Today you will tell me that you are clean.
You give me so much hope, then tomorrow it's the same ole' dope phen.

I'm telling you now that I am through with you.
This comes from my heart and every word of it is true.

I can't promise that I will be around to see,
But when you get tired of that meth, you will see.
All along you had something way better,
And it was your family.

I do thank you so much for one thing.
Thank you for showing me how important a good mother should be
And to never show my children the pain that you showed me.

So, today I officially set myself free
Because I know there's a stronger woman in me.

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Has this poem touched you? Share your story!
  • Carmen Murphy by Carmen Murphy
  • 2 years ago

I am an addict, semi-recovered, and I don't know what it feels like to have a mum who's in the throes of addiction. But what I do know is she didn't choose drugs over you. She was just oblivious to how her precious meth affected everyone she loved. Addicts always think the drug makes them a better person - like it did at the start. I hope you're all good.

  • Jamie Steele by Jamie Steele
  • 3 years ago

This really touched home with me. I am a meth addict and my kids did exactly what this poem reflects. I try every day to overcome the control it has over me. I can visualize and hear the sound of my 3 daughters' and sons' voices as they spoke these exact words. As they say, when you're ready, nothing can stop you, but I beg to differ. I am ready and I want to recover not only for myself but for my family and loved ones as well. The struggle is real...I just believe that if I had my family and loved ones as a support team, the struggle would be less.

  • Michele Lane by Michele Lane
  • 2 years ago

Dear addicts & families, I too was a mom, addicted to cocaine for 20 years and meth for four, before beating all substances and drink. 13th April 2018 at 56, I quit completely. I am 4 years totally clean and sober, have never missed any of my mad, mad world from before and for me it was giving up all 12 step programs and trusting God to work with me daily, instead. I had to trust Him as I never WHOLEHEARTEDLY had before.

In 2017, I lost my 20-year-old son. I lost our home where I raised him by having the brilliant idea to "...just move somewhere else..." Five years later with 4 years sobriety and spiritual awakening with humility, I didn't regain my son except a few texts a year. Nor a new home. I slowly faced the many hurtful things I said to my boy. I pray humility, willingness & for his happiness.
I live in my van with my cat, but I have more than I did before. Thank you, Jesus.

  • Alyssa Hall by Alyssa Hall
  • 5 years ago

This poem really hit me hard. My mother is a drug addict, and it has gone on for most of my life. I am 16 years old and many may say that I have no idea what I'm talking about, but ever since I was little I was taking care of my brothers and sisters because my mother couldn't be bothered. It didn't get super bad until about two or three years ago when my youngest sibling was born. My mom would go missing for days at a time and never contact anyone, but I got used to it. After living like that for almost two years she had been caught with drugs and was thrown into jail. When that happened all of her kids had to go and live with their fathers. We had never been separated until then. It's been about six months since I've seen my mom, but within those six months she has gone back to jail at least five different times. I know I haven't had my mom absent for as long, but it still matters.

  • Zoe by Zoe
  • 6 years ago

Why does this happen to so many innocent children? As the daughter of a drug addict, it is not fun. I have not seen my mother in 5 years. She is to the the point that she is passed out on the couch with pills scattered all over the place. I used to think my mother was the best person in the entire world, but it's not true. My mother also has bi-polar, but that is no excuse for what she has done. I currently have a restraining order on her. She threw her husband through a door. She told the doctor she was getting medicine for me, but it was really drugs for her. I wish the people would realize this hurts so many people. People die from overdose every day. I am scared that it will happen to my mother one day, but I have to pray for it to get better. Let your voice speak out to fight against drugs.

  • Whitney Godfrey by Whitney Godfrey, 6 Glenmont Lane
  • 6 years ago

I am a 41 year old mother who has battled meth addiction for almost 10 years. I have put it before anything and anyone in my life, the main one being my now 16 year old son. Back when he was born, I put being a mom over everything and loved it, but as he grew up I began to experiment with meth. I have an addictive personality, so I went head first into addiction. I sold his clothes, toys, even food for my habit. I walked away from him multiple times. His dad and my mom had to step up. It took losing my dad 6 years ago and my mom one month ago to see what meth had taken from me, and today I fight with all I have to have a relationship with not only my sister, aunt, and niece, but also my son.

  • Michele Lane by Michele Lane
  • 2 years ago

Dear Whitney, please know that you are like so many of us. Don't give up on hope, love, and faith. These are all from God. He loves us and our families. We still have today to stay clean, sober, humble and loving on our families and selves. God bless each one of us, amen.

  • Shelly Idontknow by Shelly Idontknow
  • 6 years ago

As an addict, I sit here in fear of the unknown. I have tried and tried to stay clean, and it seems hopeless! I get to day 3 or 4, and the agony I feel is like an out of body experience. It's like I'm already dead and I'm looking at my lying there, praying someone will understand. I want to beat this devil inside of me, but I'm so weak without the meth and can barely move. I don't know where to look for help.

  • M SANTA CRUZ by M SANTA CRUZ
  • 5 years ago

The answer on how to beat the addiction is in the same words you said earlier. You said "It's like I'm already dead and I'm looking at my lying there." Not die physically but committing yourself and believing into kicking it. When Jesus wanted to free us, he had to die for us. He has been through this, so pray and ask him for strength. Philippians 4:13 says - I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me. Colossians 1:10-12 - We pray that you'll have the strength to stick it out over the long haul...Strength that endures the unendurable and spills over into joy...Strong enough to take part in everything bright and beautiful that the Father has for you. Luke 1:37 - For nothing is impossible with God. Philippians 4:7 - God will give you strength for every battle, wisdom for every decision and peace that surpasses all understanding. Just believe!

  • Chelsi by Chelsi
  • 6 years ago

I couldn't relate to your story any more if I tried. My mother left when I was 4 and my dad raised me alone. I thought my mom had died for years when I was under the age of ten. I had letters that she would send me from rehab and jail, and my dad would hide them until I was I was old enough to understand. She came back around after getting clean was I was 13. That didn't even last a year. I am now 28, almost 29, and the last time I saw my mom was in jail after seeing her on the news and hardly recognizing her. Before that was 2 years ago this month, and she was 5 hours late and high. She now has cirrhosis of the liver and more than likely hep. I spoke to my aunt last week who told me my mom was talking to herself and hearing voices all the time. I feel your pain and many others out there in similar situations like ours. Like you put in the bottom section of your poem, this has made me the best mother to my two babies. I couldn't imagine hurting them the way she has.

  • Kimberly A. Walker by Kimberly A. Walker
  • 7 years ago

My story starts May 12, 1993. I lost my kids due to drugs and alcohol. I had three beautiful children, a boy and two girls. I had four, but she died six days after her birth. My oldest daughter had blond hair and blue eyes. My second daughter had deep brown eyes and very black hair with tan skin. Oh how I loved my children. I did everything I could to get them back, but the state had their minds made up. So in 1995 I decided adoption would be the best option for them and for me as I wanted the very best for my birth kids. For 17 years I sat and wondered are they dead or alive. All I could do was give them to God, and when I did I felt a peace come over me that I still cannot describe.

  • Crystal Green by Crystal Green
  • 6 years ago

This is me now. I lost my two girls. I chose meth over them. Everyone can keep telling me, "No you didn't, your addition did." No, I made a choice and I chose the drugs. I knew DFCS was coming back, and when they did I would have to take a drug test. I had weeks to get clean and stay clean. Just a couple of week, but no, I could not do that, even knowing what I was going to lose. And sure enough, they came back, and I had used, so the rest is history. Almost three years later, and I'm still fighting for my children. I've been clean a year (since 12-28-16), and they still haven't talked about them coming back.

  • Asia Sherie by Asia Sherie
  • 7 years ago

My best advice to you is to love her as much as you can and know that this life we have here on earth is only temporary. Whether she comes and goes every so often, don't push her away. Instead, when you see her, hug her. Laugh with her and make her smile. Do anything and everything you can to give her a memory of you that she takes with her wherever she goes. Don't love your mother according to her faults. Nobody understands the power of addiction until they suffer from it. Just pray for her, every day and every night. Pray that the Lord gives her strength, that he strengthens your relationship with her. That he opens her eyes and touches her heart. Pray these things with faith that the Lord will answer the desires of your heart. Be strong, baby girl, and NEVER STOP LOVING YOUR MOTHER! It is the one person on this earth you should have an everlasting love for, because she is your mother. If not for anything else, love her because she's your mom.

  • Michele Lane by Michele Lane
  • 2 years ago

Dear Asia Sherie, I love your message and am inspired by your generosity, enduring love, and positivity. As an adult child of a terribly abusive father and stepMonster, as well as a 4+ year recovering addict mom to an adult son, you gave me much hope.
I do sometimes - in these last few years of total sobriety - pray for my enemies (my father, his wife, my sisters, and former friends all of whom turned their backs on my son and me decades ago). I know Jesus calls me to pray for His strength to do so. It makes me feel light and freer when I humbly do it. Take care all - God loves us all no matter what.

  • B Olivia by B Olivia
  • 6 years ago

I love this because I once was that mother, and all I needed was faith from others as well as myself. I never lost my children, and that I thank the Lord for. Today I am 97 days clean from a 25 year meth and heroin addiction. Thank you for sharing.

  • Dora by Dora
  • 7 years ago

I am in tears as I am reading this poem. My daughter is an addict and I am now taking care of my grandkids. It tears my heart to see her destroy herself because of this drug. She is homeless now and rather than to be with her kids, the streets where she can get her fix is better than being with her family. They love her unconditionally and wait excitedly for her to come and visit them, even if only for a few moments of happiness, followed by tears once she leaves back to the streets. They believe their mommy will come back to get them once she gets better. As her mother, my heart aches for her, wanting to hug her and hold her to make it all better; but my hugs and love are not enough for her. I just keep praying every day and night and hope that one day my girl will be back, their mommy will be back.

  • Y Moyer by Y Moyer
  • 5 years ago

I am in the same situation. I hope your situation has gotten better since your last post. My daughter never comes to see her daughter. But her daughter waits patiently as our whole family does. It just hurts so bad. She was a beautiful productive person with so much going for her. I am so afraid I am going to lose her forever.

  • Heather by Heather
  • 7 years ago

I love all of these.... sometimes I feel a little ashamed when I think of my life growing up with 2 addict parents.... always fighting, cussing, "making up," and never enough time for me and my big brother... literally never enough time to see that my big brother and his friend were secretly molesting me... along with the other 2 older girls. Yes, this literally happened to me when I was 3. My mom and dad trusted the wrong people and eventually they would see. July 4th, 1999, when I was 10 years old they were busted. There had been a 10 year investigation and several CI's came forward to tell what they knew. To this day no one knows who it was exactly, and I guess it'll stay that way. Daddy went to jail for 3 months. And it was the worst 3 months in my life. He was 300 miles away and that meant my mama had nothing to hold her down, nothing to keep her straight. She relapsed again, pretty bad to see. Daddy whooped her ass when he got out. She went 6 years sober...til sometime last May!

  • Raquel Sigafoos by Raquel Sigafoos
  • 8 years ago

Both of my parents were addicts. And of course I fell in love and married a addict. I've never been a addict myself, seeing what it did to my mother and our family. Growing up in the system I want more for my kids. Its made me loath people being high in front of me, it's given me extreme anxiety. But the addict in my husband didn't come out for almost 13 yrs. I had never seen that side of him, watching him give up on life, on his kids, in me, on our love, which is truly magical, the meaning of unconditional love, is killing me. I know I'm fighting a fight I can never win, he'll never understand the hurt and pain, and my desperation to save the man I love.

  • Leah Niswonger by Leah Niswonger
  • 7 years ago

Your story touched me inside. Thinking about my life and what I have been through, your story reminds me of myself and how I was an addict. I was also in foster care from day 1 till I was 2. Never knew my parents and never want to. Meth changes who a person is inside: their personalities, their character, their attitude. They will push people out of their life, and no knows it at the time. Meth is a extremely dangerous drug that will tear a person's life to shreds. I should know, I have done it for 3 years so far and I got locked up, and since then I've been clean. I enjoyed your story.

  • Donna-marie Card by Donna-marie Card, Essex
  • 8 years ago

I can only imagine my daughter thinking the same, I quit too, because of family we sometimes find strength, though for some sadly they cannot re salvage theirs. We are strong women, because of our family, somehow we managed not to leave it too late....we beat the addiction, it never beat us x

  • Teresa Tanig by Teresa Tanig
  • 9 years ago

I used meth for a long period The disappointment on her face in her eyes just tore me up! I quit!!!

  • Lauren by Lauren, Florida
  • 10 years ago

Thank you for sharing your story in this poem. I recently took legal custody of my two grandchildren from their meth addicted parents. This poem validates that what I am doing is right, and that refusing to let the parents see or speak with the children until they present a clean drug screen is ultimately protecting the children.

My heart and soul grieves for you, my kids and grandkids, and everyone in the world affected by this horrific addiction.

  • Sally by Sally
  • 10 years ago

Thanks for sharing. Your mother doesn't deserve you. I will never understand why someone will choose drugs over their children...never. So sorry that she did that to you. I wish I was your mother. I'd hug you every day and tell you that I love you more than life itself.

  • Monica Ramirez by Monica Ramirez
  • 7 years ago

With all due respect, Sally, my name is Monica, and I was an addict since I was 8 years old. I'm 34 now and I have 5 children. Yes, I didn't use with 2 of my pregnancies. I know I may sound like the worse parent ever, but I got 6 months clean now and it's been 7 years I haven't had my kids, but they are back in my life and I finally get to be a part of their lives. My meaning to this is that I don't blame the addict; I blame the addiction, the disease. It totally takes over you and just ruins your life until it practically owns you and you don't even know yourself anymore. Yes, I understand that some parents really don't care, but not all of them. I love my kids with every beat of my heart, but that addiction had a hold of me. Thank you, Jesus, for saving me.

  • Shedlon Maybem by Shedlon Maybem
  • 10 years ago

I've never told the story of my life but yet it's comforting to see more people have been through similar situations. My mom has been addicted to meth for about 12 years or so. I was clueless for awhile but found out one day when she decided to write on the shower in blood when I was about 5. Then years had passed and she would be suicidal. Or have different episodes of her being a clean freak and hitting us when the house wasn't clean enough. It's said to be hereditary, the addiction. She gets it from her mom and all of her sisters are addicted as well. She'll go through periods of time where she convinces us that she is done, that she'll never do it again. She swears that my sister and I are more important than drugs. But then CPS shows up and she's worried about them testing her? Yep, she's at it again. Just today I found for the first time her stash. I honestly don't know what to do. I even found a needle. Part of me wants to die right now, the other half is thinking maybe I should make her feel the way she's made me feel all my life and use it too. I love her so much but she just keeps making new bad friends that she says aren't bad. And then she gets the drugs. My life feels like it's in ruins. I don't want to come home again to an ambulance taking my mom to the hospital. Oh god, I'm worried.

  • Francine M. Garcia by Francine M. Garcia, 7410 ledgewood place
  • 8 years ago

Please don't pick up. I will pray for you. DON'T DO IT TOO.

  • Amy Romero by Amy Romero
  • 10 years ago

My mother was a beautiful woman nice, pretty face. I can't even remember when she was using, all I remember is she lost her job. I found out when I got out from high school I was 18 years, that she lost it because of a failed drugs test. I moved out of my mom's house, the house was a mess. Dog sh*t everywhere really bad odor. She would sleep all day my dad would work and come to a mess. It was really sad. I moved back 5 years later, I help clean up me and my daughter. So time healed, but things got weird again she would treat me like trash, would cook for my dad she just started caring more and more about herself, till one day she had my whole family thinking she was sick from a plant. She had sores all over her skin and face she looked scary like that's not my mother anymore. So my grandma and my cousin came over and we all pray for her thinking that the plant was the reason her skin look like that. The next day I need to take my daughter to head start preschool I needed to take her to school, I was going to use my mom's car. She left with my dad to the doctors for her skin, as I was looking through her stuff I found a glass pipe with straws, and white stuffs. I knew what it was so I told my brother and we were tripping out because she had my grandma and everyone fool. I think that pray was for me to find out about her using. My parents came home I showed my dad he was speechless, my mom act like she didn't care and acted like it was nothing. Till this day she hasn't stopped.

  • Glen by Glen, Perth
  • 10 years ago

My wife and mother of my three beautiful kids is addicted to meth, has been for eight years. She leaves to the shops and we don't see her for weeks. It is tearing my family apart what can I do to make her realize what she is doing to her kids and what she is sacrificing. Please help.

  • Christele Kennedy by Christele Kennedy
  • 7 years ago

I'm not an expert by any means, but what I do know is your wife is being controlled by this drug. Everything in her life is controlled by meth. Incredibly sad for you and the children involved. My suggestion to you is get in touch with a support group that can help support you in dealing with the multitude of issues you all face. Above all, you need to put your children first now. The damage that can be done to these innocents is mind blowing. Realize that coming off meth is incredibly hard but needs professional help to do so. I'm so sorry you're going through this and wish you the very best.

  • Lorna by Lorna, Washington
  • 10 years ago

I'm touched by this poem...my mom has been on drugs for 2 years she's tearing me and my siblings apart. She's had 3 marriages 2 of her ex husbands one being my dad have died so there is hurt and pain, but there's always a way to get help, if you want it. I thought 6 kids would motivate change but she lost custody of my two sisters ages 8 and 10. I'm happy because today I help people get into recovery from drugs. I pray one day she will surrender and get help and mean it. I saw her today on her way to get drugs walking 4 miles to get them and I decided to let her be because she was in a rush and had no time to hug me as she turned to walk away, I said mom, "tell your granddaughter you love her please". Sad I had to tell her I know, and she said "oh I'm sorry" and hugged her and left. I wanted to hug her because I never know when she will die...it's very painful even though I'm grown but she made me realize how important it is to be there for your child. I know the mom I don't want to be and that's the mom of me.

  • Starr Chinnery by Starr Chinnery
  • 10 years ago

Hey. This poem is literally amazing. You did an awesome job! My mother is addicted to meth and has been for about 15 years. She has chosen drugs over all 7 of her kids and her house got busted on 12/12/12. My stepfather who was also using was sent to prison for about 14 and 1/2 years. It's a very devastating thing to go through. She went to rehab just a bit ago and passed. but she came back and immediately started using again.

  • Taylor by Taylor, Florida
  • 10 years ago

This story hits close to home, my mom was addicted to she choose drugs over her kids and went to prison for it. The whole time she was in prison she told me everything was going to change, she was going to change, no more drugs she said... She finally got out of prison moved three states away with out even trying to see her kids. Then three months later she died because she OD

  • Marty Lundegreen by Marty Lundegreen
  • 11 years ago

This is my story. I never went to prison but I lived in my own prison & held my kids hostage as well. My son was 7 and my daughter was 9. Their dad took them from me. At the time I thought I was a great mom and they didn't know I did drugs (their dad used too) & one day I was mom and the next their dad told them I gave them up for drugs. 7 years of pure hell. I finally found strength to fight for my kids and to get clean. I succeeded. 2 years later my daughter is now 18. I have had a one time relapse and she feels betrayed, lied too and angry. I'm trying to stay clean and keep fighting to prove to her that I'm not going to go backwards. But she isn't ready to let me back into her life. Its discouraging. It sounds selfish and I hate myself. But I need her love and support to stay clean. Although I know I don't deserve it. Addiction is hard to fight. When you betray your children for your addiction it's hard to find a reason to live. I'm ashamed. Sorry. And devastated that I hurt my babies. I'm lost.

  • Kerri Wilson by Kerri Wilson
  • 8 years ago

I've been there myself but thankfully my kids have never given up on me, the key to staying clean is to want it for YOURSELF. I still want to use but I choose not to, I don't like the feeling of being burnt all the time, forgetting the little things and not to mention the bigger ones, sitting there planning whatever and by the time I'm ready the day has passed. No I'm good and I don't need it and when it's overwhelming I take a cold shower ....and I find something to keep me busy till it passes...You do it for you and nobody else....wishing you nothing but success in your recovery...

  • Lara Gallaher by Lara Gallaher
  • 8 years ago

Please tell me how you did it. I am so lost and broken.. I feel like a failure and a terrible mom. I wish my 15 year old daughter would call me. I wanna hear her voice. I know I made the wrong choices but why am I being punished for so long. We all make bad decisions and I am terribly sorry. She told me she hated me and never called or texted again. I miss her so very much. She was my life and now that she is gone with her dad my life has been crushed and broken. Will I ever heal? Will I ever see my daughter again ~ the one that gave me a reason to live and to better myself has all been taken away from me and I will never be the same. God please help all of us suffering from parental alienation and teens hating one parent. Please someone hear my cry. Please . God bless you all

  • Fort Worth Tx by Fort Worth Tx
  • 11 years ago

I've gone through all of this this except I have never been to jail. About four months ago I gave up my rights to my two beautiful boys, who I miss very much. Everyday is a constant struggle in my head and heart. I'm still using and I'm still very unhappy. Everyday I hate myself as I battle my demons. This was the second time I fought my addiction and lost my kids. The last time I got them back was when I was sober 4 1/2 years ago. At that time my life fell apart and I had to fight everyday to live. My children are my world and I said I wouldn't live if I lost them. The first time I tried treatment I was sober thirty days. I became discouraged when I realized that no one acknowledged or cared. I gave up. I came from a dysfunctional home that also had drugs. I cry all the time and feel like my kids hate me. I constantly beat myself up because I never wanted this for them. My goal, since I was 12, was to be everything my mom wasn't and it eats me up that I failed. I don't want to use but I can't deal with life. I won't stand here and say I gave my kids up for meth because it was a lot of reasons. I wanted the kids out of my family and away from addiction. I also felt like I was lower then dirt and didn't deserve them. This was also a way to get them away from their horrible father, who I couldn't get away from myself. I hoped to get them a better life. I miss them every day, minute and second. Please moms don't ever think for one moment it's better to use, because I'm dead every day for my choice.

  • Mary Adelia Henderson by Mary Adelia Henderson
  • 4 years ago

I know your pain, but when the state removed my children over a positive drug test for meth, I was given a list of things to do and was told if I didn't do them, I would lose my kids and my newborn grandbaby. On that list was drug court, which is group three times a week and court every Monday. Every time my color popped up, I had to drug test not knowing when it would pop up. Well, I guess what also helped was I had only been doing meth for a little over three months when the state came in and took the kids. I thank God and the state for coming into my life or there's no telling where I would be. My kids were enough for me to say no more for me, and believe me, drug court's designed to either fix you or kill you. But I suffered from prescription addiction before that. It's hard, and someone that has never been through it will never understand someone that's going through it. The brain is a very powerful thing when it comes to addiction. I wish you all the best.

  • Terri Lee by Terri Lee
  • 11 years ago

I'm sorry for your pain. I am printing your poem and sending to my friends daughter who is jail for the 10th or more time. She has a three year son who she lost custody off and wants him terribly. She loves him but can't seem to kick this addiction. I am sending this to her hoping it will help her see what her son will endure through the eyes of you. You are a strong woman and I'm sure your mother loves you! Thank you for sharing your story.

  • Helpless by Helpless, Philippines
  • 11 years ago

I'm going through the same thing. I have no idea what to do. We can't afford rehab, and that culture is very different here when it comes to that. I am so tempted to just get up and go, leave and free myself like you did, but I'd be leaving her with my grandparents. they've dealt with my mother's issues all her life, and it's easier for me to walk away. I just don't want them to feel like I left them with this burden. There's no getting through to my mom, and I'm only just realizing how deep I'm in this.

  • Cheri by Cheri
  • 11 years ago

I almost am that mother in the poem.
One difference- I never put it before my daughter, I kept it from her for over 10 years, never did it when I knew I would be seeing her, and when I was finally done with it, I admitted to her I had stopped. I knew in my heart and soul that I was done, so I had had a heart test and physical, I have been clean for over 2 years-almost 3 and find it amusing that when I had tried to explain to her that her dad was also involved she cut me off from her life completely. Irony of it all is now I am the mother she wanted and she is still holding strong to the false belief that her dad was the total solid citizen. Murphy's law is so appropriate.

  • Sweetie by Sweetie
  • 12 years ago

I'm going through this with my daddy. But I can't give up on him... He's now locked up but he's really done for good. And I'm so proud of how he's pulling thru. He's NEVER did drugs and in only two years it drug him down that quick.. Lord please help us through. You always do.!!

  • Deedee by Deedee, Tx
  • 12 years ago

My parents never used any type of drugs or alcohol. I ended up marrying a drug addict! It has made my life miserable and it has only gotten worse. He has lied to me and even stolen from me. I have decided after reading all of these wonderful messages, that I am going to ask him for a divorce. I am a Devout Catholic and I know it is wrong to divorce but things are not going to get any better. He is pulling my strength down and I need to be here for my children. I have prayed, I have asked him to seek help. It seems like he is trying to get help now but he just lost his job. I can't deal with it anymore. I have to get my children away from him.

  • Jessica by Jessica
  • 12 years ago

My name is Jessica Schiafone I'm 29 years old, My daughters #13 Birthday is TODAY...Her name is Brittney and she was 10 yrs. old when she was taken from my custody stemming from my addiction to Meth. I've spent 6 months in county lockup, completed a 12 month FAITH BASED rehabilitation program. I've been home and haven't had to pee in a cup for anyone since June 10th when I graduated THE FOUNDRY (This place is real.) I don't believe I've been clean since that day. I know that Brittney is disappointed in my because I just went in front of a judge and was awarded visitation with her under 1 condition that was to pass a drug screen, he continued on to praise me only to find out that I felled the drug test for meth, THC, and ecstasy. I have hurt my daughter in a way that can never be repaired. I only pray now that I can FORGIVE MYSELF. I knew a life without drugs and it was good, I FEEL that these are her words to me.....

  • Shyanne by Shyanne
  • 12 years ago

My mom and my dad both went down that road, then I did...... It still haunts me everyday....

  • Brooke by Brooke
  • 12 years ago

So this hit home for me, brought tears to my eyes, it reminds me of my own mother. Whoever wrote this you did a great job.

  • Frances by Frances, Seagoville
  • 12 years ago

Hello I would like to say to each and every one of you who have posted on the site about this poem. Which by the way is outstanding. I am a 48 year old recovered Meth user. For many years I used meth. and done what ever I had to just to get my next hit. Meth is a very strong drug and it is not very easy to just lay it down. It is harder to stop then any other Addiction in the world even smoking or drinking. By the Grace of God I am still here and only because I had a niece who would not give up on me and prayed for God to bring me back home. Well God answered that prayer in Jan, 2009. I was saved and stopped using meth. What will help each and every one of you is to find you a Celebrate Recovery close by your home look it up on the internet to see if one is close. It is a 12 step study for Hurts, Habits and hangups and I believe with all my heart it will help you all. Just give it a try. God bless you all and just don't turn your back on her all the way. She needs you now more then ever just keep praying.

  • Eve London by Eve London
  • 12 years ago

I have never had an addiction to drugs. I am sure it is a terrible thing and difficult to wrestle with. I do have so much sympathy for the children of drug addicts their lives are turned upside down and inside out it is very sad I wish these children good luck and hope they succeed in life. I can only imagine a little of what this young person is going through you are an individual and show great promise. Good Luck.

  • Tia by Tia
  • 12 years ago

My moms been an addict my whole life!! I'm 19 I have 4 younger siblings 17, 14, 11, and 9. We have all suffered from her addictions... She's not only an IV meth user but shoots up morphine and she's an alcoholic!! I have a 2 year old son that means the world to me and I am currently 9 months pregnant with my baby girl!! And my 17 year old brother has a daughter on the way.. My mom hasn't changed for any of us so I don't think it will ever happen!! I love my mom but she needs help!! And I've tried.. I can't do it no more!!

  • Jdub by Jdub
  • 13 years ago

This poem brought tears to my eyes. This was my life. My mother has been addicted to meth since I was a child. I am now 28 years old. The only time I have ever seen her clean was the 10 years she was in prison. When she got out she went right back. I have a brother who is thirteen years younger than me. She had him while in prison and just like me another family member has always raised him. She says she is clean now but I know she is not. Thank God she doesn't come around often for my brother's sake because all she does is poison him with lies and gets money out of him. What mother takes money from a 15 year old little boy.. I am now a mother of a beautiful 5 year old little girl. And just like this poem the only thing I can thank my "mother" for is how NOT to treat your child. My daughter is my world, everything I do is for her and I make sure she never has to feel an ounce of the pain I did from my mother. Know you are not alone.

  • Ohio by Ohio
  • 13 years ago

I am so sorry for you. I am 43 now and was addicted to meth myself. I put my family thru a lot and regret every minute. My boys seen the things my husband and I did. and in return he became an addicted to pills. He is 24 and on the path to recovery with a lot of hard work. I will stand by him to get him thru so we can stay clean together. It sickens me to see what I did to my family. I have been clean 12 years and am proud of that.

  • Tiffany by Tiffany, WA
  • 13 years ago

I am a single mother of a two and a half year old and growing up seeing my mom throw her life away for meth I swore it would be different for my kid. I thought I would break the family cycle of addiction in my family. I had my son 5 weeks before turning 21 as my mom did. I was content with a party free life until I went out and remembered how much fun I had. One night I finally gave in to my "friends" and snorted oxy next thing I know I'm addicted within a year tent begging for money. I went to treatment after I had a failed suicide attempt, It saved my life I had a little clean time relapsed and went on a run. I began using meth when dope sick because it was all around my moms house and I need some relief from the pain. I figured I could use crystal to get off H with out getting addicted to it. I have never been soo wrong in my life.

  • Mimonix by Mimonix
  • 13 years ago

I live the same story. It is Mother's Day 2011 and some days before this I told my mom I hope she overdoses on meth and dies. Her reply was that she doesn't do it anymore, that she's over it. And of course I don't believe her for one second. If you need someone to talk to about this, please Facebook me. I would love company in this situation.

  • Faith Williams by Faith Williams
  • 13 years ago

This is a poem that is one of the best I have ever read! my mommy is an addict as well so I know how you feel. I pray for you!

  • Stephanie by Stephanie, Victora
  • 13 years ago

Hey, I'm so sorry to hear about your mum, my mum isn't on meth, but she takes any pill she can get her hands on. My mum has a 8 yr old son that now live with me and he calls me mum now and I'm 17. I had to move out of home at 15, it really upsets me to hear mothers like this, my mum still thinks she is fine, but she is way far from it, I don't know how to make her see anymore, I really like this poem, I hope your mum realizes what a great daughter she has, all the best xxx

  • Winnipeg by Winnipeg
  • 13 years ago

I just wanted to say that your poem touched me. I have a family member who has been addicted to meth as well as other drugs for many years and it has torn our family apart. I was looking on the internet just to try to make me feel a bit better as yesterday my brother trashed the house assaulted us. I had him arrested. The way you feel and the poem is how me and my family feel. Not many people understand and I just hope that one day our addicted family members realize what they are doing to their selves and families.

  • Christy by Christy, Utah
  • 13 years ago

I love this poem. I am a recovering meth addict. In April I will have 5 years clean and sober. I have 3 little boys and I dragged them through hell with my addiction. In the past 5 years, I have really tried to be the best mom I can be. I have tried to teach them a better way of life. Their dad hung himself in 2004 due to his addiction. I want my boys to know that there are better ways to cope with life besides doing drugs to cover up emotions. Sorry to all of you who are still suffering from a loved ones or your own addiction. You are all in my prayers.

  • Dickson by Dickson, Italy
  • 14 years ago

My mom and dad both died of addiction to a local brew known as changaa I know the pain, bitterness, and difficulties that the children of such parents undergo, as they don't have answers to the problems. But I believe so much that loving them, not abandoning them, can bring change to both. Love brings out the goodness in us, they knew that I loved them, and they tried to fight the addiction but it was all in vain. Some win and some lose. Love will make us a better people.

  • Alexandra by Alexandra
  • 14 years ago

This poem seriously describes my life down to every last detail except the fact that my mom does crack instead of meth. She went from being my best friend to some drug addict prostitute I don't even know anymore. Its impacted my life so much and I just know exactly how to feel. Its a great feeling knowing that there is someone out there that understands the pain. I'm sorry for the pain your mom and her drug has caused you. We just really need to break the cycle and rise above our parents.
Thank you for this beautiful poem.

  • Brandi by Brandi, MO USA
  • 14 years ago

hi I'm 16 yrs old and my mom is addicted to meth recently she was arrested for stabbing her husband because they were fighting over meth she will now spend 3 to 7 yrs in prison because of this sick monster. I've wrote her so many times telling her how much I cry at night and she hasn't wrote back once.

  • Shanel by Shanel
  • 14 years ago

Meth stole my mom too, I am 26 years old, she has been addicted my whole life and still uses to this day, she has no idea how much she has hurt me or continues too. It's been very hard for me to tell her or talk about it, but this poem makes me realize I have to tell her what she's doing...It's a great poem, every word of it is what I think about saying to her everyday.. Thank you.

  • Laurie Stewart by Laurie Stewart
  • 14 years ago

That poem was so sad. I see that kind of pain in my nieces because of what their Mother has put them through. She is a meth addict and loves it more than her children. I understand Brittany's pain and wish her the best. I hope all children of addicts will learn from the pain their parents have caused them and not follow the same road. I have seen this happen and it makes me wonder why, when they know how much pain this causes and how many lives it destroys.

  • Brianna by Brianna
  • 14 years ago

Wow! This is so true with my like right now... I am 13 and my mother is addicted to Cocaine... She thinks that I don't know she is doing it... It tears me apart when I see her and she is high... I just want to tell her that I know, but I can't. This poem REALLY touched me, and brought me to tears... Thank you for publishing this poem

  • Isabella by Isabella, Chester Virginia
  • 15 years ago

My stories not as bad, my mom abandoned us for narcotics and Miss Mary Jane, not as bad as meth, but still the same concept. She was in jail, in and out since I was 8. She did it before I was born, but slowed down while I was little. My dad had no clue. Writing false prescriptions all up and down the east coast put her on 3 years probation, but she lived away from us. I've cut her from my life. I'm really sorry about your mom, I kind of know what its like to loose a mom.

  • liz by liz
  • 15 years ago

I'm blessed to say that my mother has never been on drugs but I was at a party one day and I met this girl that was on meth really bad and she was tripping. I later found out she has two kids and I know they are young. I can only imagine what they are going through and I hope that one day she will see. and I hope it wont be to late. Please don't put your drugs before kids.

  • lisa by lisa
  • 15 years ago

this poem reminds me of how things are. Life as an addict is scary it takes away every other thing in life

  • amy-21 by amy-21
  • 15 years ago

this poem touches me because my own mother was addicted to meth and it ruined a lot of good things in my life. my parents divorced over it, I was pulled from the home that I had known my whole life, and my relationship with my mother changed forever. she has been clean now for almost four years but the space that her addiction put between us can never be mended. I made a vow to myself that I would never put anything before my child and so far I haven't broken that promise. I don't want my daughter to ever feel the way I felt, see what I saw, or have to make the choices I felt I had to make.

  • Brittany by Brittany Poet
  • 15 years ago

Thanks to everyone for the feedback. For anyone that wants to talk you can email me on myspace. Thank you again.

  • yvonne by yvonne
  • 15 years ago

hi my dear, my goodness that WAS me and my daughter, I was addicted to meth for many years, it started off as socially than to lose weight than it grabbed me by every ounce of who I was it never let go of me until I let go of it, and believe me it was tragic what I did to my kids!!! but the power of Jesus set me FREE, free indeed, when people say there is no hope let me tell you the hope is in Jesus Christ!!!! His love for us is so awesome just give him that chance, He is the only way, amen,

  • bow_wow by bow_wow
  • 15 years ago

well I am going through the same but I'm only 14 and its scary really scary I usually cry myself to sleep but this poem is so true I know!

  • monica by monica
  • 15 years ago

this poem hit home hard, I too was on meth for over fifteen years, but by the grace of God I am sober and my adult children are still in my life and my grandson too. I thank God everyday for every day I'm blessed.

  • jessica by jessica
  • 15 years ago

Hey this poem was great I have been thru the same thing but it was my dad and he is in prison also for it me and you need to talk trust me I need some one to talk to that's been there to!!!!!!

  • Tarina by Tarina
  • 15 years ago

This poem hits close to home, I cried when I read it. My mom was addicted to heroin for about 12 years. That poem is all to true.

  • Tonja by Tonja
  • 15 years ago

Wow, this poem brings tears to my eyes. I was addicted to Meth only 3 yrs but my sons are what gave me the strength to get clean. They loved me enough to tell me they'd be there for me if I would only do whatever it took to get clean. It saddens me so much to know how many kids are out there with parents who wont get clean. I don't understand it. My children were my inspiration and my reason to get clean. The guilt never goes away, but I'm alive and I'm learning to live with it.

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