Poems That Grip The Heart

I want someone to hold me,
But I'm the only one here.
I want someone to listen to me,
But I'm the only ear.

Can anybody hear me?
Does anybody care?
Does anybody even know
I'm dealing with despair?

There are voices in my mind
Saying I should die.
Will anybody even tell me
They're only just a lie?

Does anybody love me?
Would they shed a tear?
Would anybody even care
If I were to disappear?

The ones who preach friendship
Have left me all alone.
The ones who are not here
Promised not to let me go.

Can anybody see me?
Does anybody care?
Does anybody even know
The burden that I bear?

I've built up this wall
To hide who I am,
And now that I need help,
I'm alone behind it all.

Can you see the real me?
Will you even try?
Can you even tell I need
A break in the wall tonight?

I'm crying all alone,
Not sure what to do.
Please just let me know
That at least I still have you.

The years have passed by
In the blink of an eye,
Moments of sadness
And joy have flown by.

People I loved
Have come and have gone,
But the world never stopped,
And we all carried on.

Life wasn't easy,
And the struggles were there,
Filled with times that it mattered,
Times I just didn't care.

I stood on my own,
And I still found my way,
Through some nights filled with tears,
And the dawn of new days.

And now with old age,
It's become very clear;
Things I once found important
Were not why I was here.

And how many things
That I managed to buy
Were never what made me
Feel better inside.

And the worries and fears
That plagued me each day,
In the end of it all,
Would just fade away.

But how much I reached out
To others when needed,
Would be the true measure
Of how I succeeded.

And how much I shared
Of my soul and my heart
Would ultimately be
What set me apart.

And what's really important,
Is my opinion of me,
And whether or not
I'm the best I can be.

And how much more kindness
And love I can show
Before the Lord tells me
It's my time to go.

We wear the mask that grins and lies,
It hides our cheeks and shades our eyes,—
This debt we pay to human guile;
With torn and bleeding hearts we smile,
And mouth with myriad subtleties.

Why should the world be over-wise,
In counting all our tears and sighs?
Nay, let them only see us, while
       We wear the mask.

We smile, but, O great Christ, our cries
To thee from tortured souls arise.
We sing, but oh the clay is vile
Beneath our feet, and long the mile;
But let the world dream otherwise,
       We wear the mask!

You're my love, my life,
The air that I breathe.
You're my soul, my happiness,
The all that I need.

You're my light, my dark,
The stars in the sky.
You're my ups, my downs,
The reason I try.

You're my strength, my weakness,
The love from the start.
You're my heartache, my pain,
The beat of my heart

You're my tears, my joy,
The love that you bring.
You're my world, my galaxy,
You're my everything.

She stood on the bridge
In silence and fear,
For the demons of darkness
Had driven her here.

They cut her heart
Right out of her chest,
Making her believe
That the demons knew best.

They were always there,
Sometimes just out of sight,
Waiting in the background
Till the time was right.

These demons were destructive,
Knocking down the life she knew,
Hating everything about her;
She hated herself, too.

These demons can't be seen,
But they're far from fairy tales.
They live inside your mind;
Their evilness prevails.

So on the bridge she stood,
About to end the fight.
Then she stopped and thought
I'll fight them one more night.

In every room of our time together there is a box
Of memories we shared.
Now is the time to pack away
With sadness and with care.

The first is a simple smile,
Whenever I thought of you.
Neatly folded into four,
It's the best that I could do.

Next are all the memories
Of the times when we were two,
Wrapped with love one by one,
Sealed with tears as glue.

And then there are the butterflies
I had when you were near,
Now in a cage of sadness
And locked up with a tear.

Next are the times we kissed,
Each one wrapped with a sigh,
Placed next to a rolled up list
Of all the times I've asked myself why.

Now to pack are the pieces of my heart,
Gathered in a pile.
Each one wrapped up tenderly
And placed next to a distant smile.

Finally all the shattered wishes,
Placed in softly so no more can break,
Covering them over trying not to cry
So they would not all ache.

Lastly walking round each room,
Closing each and every curtain,
Shutting each and every door,
Leaving behind each and ever pain.

Gathering up the memories we shared,
Making sure I've got them all,
Packing them softly because I cared,
Leaving them in the boxes in the hall.

Nobody knows it's empty,
The smile that I wear.
The real one is left behind in the past
Because I left you there...

Nobody knows I am crying.
They won't even see my tears.
When they think I am laughing,
I wish you were here...

Nobody knows it's painful.
They think that I am strong.
They say it won't kill me,
But I wonder if they are wrong...

Nobody knows I miss you.
They think I am all set free,
But I feel like I am bound with chains,
Trapped in the mystery...

Nobody knows I need you.
They think I can do it on my own,
But they don't know I am crying
When I am all alone...

Sometimes
I wish that you could see
This scared girl inside of me.
I'm not really as I seem.
I'm not tough, strong, or mean.
That isn't me.

This isn't the real me.
I fight by day,
Yet cry at night.
No one can see through
My false identity.

I've been hurt,
As you can see,
So I created
A fake me.

No one ever tries
To get through my shield.
All I want to be is me.

How do I show
What I've kept hidden for years?
How do I show
All the silent fears?

What would you think
If I showed you me?
What would you say
Without my false identity?

The plates will still shift
and the clouds will still spew.
The sun will slowly rise
and the moon will follow too.

Life’s beauty will continue
to flourish all around,
but now you are gone,
these birds have no sound.

And my heart does not beat.
It is still inside my chest.
My tears keep on falling
and my head will not rest.

But I have no choice only
to move through this life.
Endlessly attempting
to fill this longing that is rife.

I help you through hard times, as you do I,
But you really don't know how much I hide.
Even though we are the best of friends,
I really don't think you can understand.
I can't bear the hurt; I can't stand the pain,
A feeling of numbness I can't explain.

This is a life in which I walk alone,
Full of hope shattered and broken,
Always angry for no reason at all,
Constantly wanting to end this brawl.
Fighting with myself again and again,
Sometimes I want this life to end.

Mom's depressed but chooses to hide,
Takes out her anger on those by her side,
Doesn't understand I try to help.
She shuns me out and hates instead.

Grandma's enduring an unstoppable fate.
Sickness has gotten her on the plate.
It's sad to see such an innocent person
Become another cancer victim.

Too many friends are hurt as well
Thinking that their life is hell.
Too many friends wanting to stop,
Thinking suicide is the only option.

But inside me is the worst of all.
I don't know how long I can stand tall.
Memories of happiness are shooed away,
But horrible twisted thoughts to stay.

Nothing I do can make her proud.
There's no silver lining on her clouds.
I'm a rainstorm filled with dark black skies
And a haunting rainfall full of lies.
I only wish I could make her see
I'm trying hard so I can be
Someone she that can trust and love.
Instead, she tells me I'm not good enough.
Everything I do is a wrong decision.
She constantly tells me I'm not living
The path that she truly wishes I'd take,
But I'm only one big mistake.
If I could I'd erase myself from here,
I wouldn't have to live this fear.

I also wish I could be skinny
And always happy, fun, and pretty.
Instead, I look at myself in the mirror,
Disappointed in the reflection that appears.
It's hard to live when you don't love who you are,
Wishing that you could change it all.

Every day I make a mental note.
How much would I miss if I decide to go?
And how much hurt makes me lean towards the edge
Is slowly creeping up the hedge.
How much longer can I last
Before my life becomes one of the past?

Her thoughts bob under the surface,
Her lost dreams circling around her in clouds.
Every fake smile, fake laugh,
Only feeds the emptiness inside.
She's lost the ability to cry,
Surrendered it to the numbness
So she no longer has to feel.

The thick, black cloud overcomes her,
Smothering her till she suffocates.
She gasps, while inside her,
Everything is torn apart.
Her heart ripped to shreds,
And repeatedly stabbed,
With a rusty dagger.

Her soul screams as the demons rip into it,
Those horrible monsters.
No. They're her demons,
Her horrible monsters.
She's her own monster.
The guilt's eating her alive,
As she slowly kills herself...

From the inside out.
She seems fine on the outside.
The same laughing, smiling girl she's always been.
The scars she keeps hidden are the only sign.
A silent scream,
But no one notices,
Or do they just not care?

She's so alone.
She's always been alone.
Ever since the shadows ate her essence,
Sacrificed herself to the cold tendrils of sin.
False promises tempting her away from the Light,
And into the barren Darkness.
She's always so LOST...

Inside her own body...
It seems her hands have a mind of their own,
As they slice her arms,
Her ankles,
Her thighs.
With the blade she's always kept as a close companion,
The same rusty razor.

She watches the blood as it leaks out,
Down her arms and thighs.
Her release from the never ending cold.
But it's not enough.
It's never enough.
Not when she carries the weight
Of the world on her shoulders.

But she knows what is enough.
She stares at the bottle of pills,
Knowing this is her escape
From the Darkness that surrounds her.
I'd be quick,
Painless.
She's already slowly killing herself.

Destroying her soul.
No one can help,
They've tried before,
And they helped...
For a while.
But then she was back to faking her joy
With the mask that became her best friend.

She began starving herself.
She could never look good enough,
She found joy in each ache of hunger.
It meant it was working,
She was going to be skinny,
But it was never enough.
How could it ever be?

When she couldn't resist food, she'd stuff herself,
Then made a point of throwing up.
She pushed everyone away,
Stuck in her solitude.
Her shadow her best friend,
But soon the shadow was her.
A forgotten ghost...

Just a piece of who she was,
Who she used to be.
Left behind as she slowly killed herself,
She's only a shadow,
A wisp in the wind.
Never finding happiness.
She lost herself.

With no hope of being found...